I slid the key card in the lock and the door opened with a click. It was dark, except for a few candles that were lit on either side of the bed. There was a note, just like all the rest, propped up against the largest candle. Underneath it there was a blindfold. My hands shook as I opened the note.
Donât speak. Donât think. You have trusted me so far. This is the last note. Have you figured out who I am? You will know tonight, if you stay. You can leave now, and you will never know. If you stay you must do exactly what I tell you.
If you want to leave, place the key on the table and walk out. If you want to stay, take off your clothes, put on the blindfold, and lie down on the bed. No peeking. Wait for me there and donât leave.
I swallowed hard as I contemplated what to do. I tried to think of every note I had received over the past nine months. Not one left a single clue as to who was writing them. I took a deep breath and figured that I had come this far, I couldnât turn away. I had to know who was behind this.
I did as I was instructed, shedding my clothes and placing them neatly on the chair next to the desk. I lay myself down on the silk sheets, placed the blindfold tightly over my eyes, and waited.
I began to grow tired as hours passed, but my body was anticipating what was going to happen. My mind began imagining the eveningâs possibilities and I grew more anxious. Suddenly, I sensed that someone was there. I heard no noise, but I felt as though someone was beside me. My heart began to pound, and I felt nervous. I started to sweat, and got myself ready to run out of this place without looking back. I must be crazy to put myself in this position. What was I thinking? There I was, naked, blind, and vulnerable to a stranger. I couldnât swallow as the reality of my situation started to set in. I wanted to scream, but something wouldnât let me. I felt as though I couldnât move. I was as good as dead. My fingers gripped the sheets on either side of me, squeezing them into a tight wad in my fists as I felt movement all around me. How many people are there? I never thought that there could be more than one. It seemed as though every bit of common sense that was in me, vanished under the persuasiveness of this stranger. Every possible scenario flashed through my mind, causing me to shake with fear. Still, I defied my urge to run, and fought to stay where I was. I couldnât turn back now.
My heart was pounding in my ears, and my breath was heavy. My eyes began to fill with tears and I felt my body getting cold, still wanting to scream and still unable to move. I heard the television turn on with a pop, confirming that I was definitely not alone. My whole body was on pins and needles, and began to burn from the top of my head to the tips of my toes.
My ears rang with a familiar sound from the television. I turned my head towards the source of the sound and listened as hard as I could. The volume was low, but I could almost make out the familiar voice. I felt my body burn with embarrassment when I realized what I was listening to.
A gift for you. I know youâve always wanted one, so this is for you. You can do with it whatever you want, but you have to do something for me first. If you donât want to do it, then you must leave it where it is and walk away. But if you want it, then youâll use it. I want to see you, all of you. I want you to touch yourself, and show me what you like. I want to know what pleases you. When you are done, leave the tape here, and I will get it.
Another note, attached to a video camera. Not the first note, but the most daring up until now. I closed my eyes tightly as the stupidity of my act rang in my ears. How do I know this tape isnât all over the internet, or copies being mailed to my friends and family? What was I thinking? For months, I looked at that camera in the backseat of my car, contemplating what I should do, almost praying that it would soon be gone so I no longer had a choice. I remembered making the decision, as once again, curiosity got the better of me. I couldnât let this go without knowing who was behind it. I just had to know. I made my decision, and followed through. The tape was gone from my backseat the very next day, and the camera was mine to keep.
I listened to myself on the tape, and the images flashed through my head. I could see myself, sprawled out on my bedroom floor, my fingers pumping in and out of myself. I started to become excited remembering what I felt like. I was doing something so wrong. Exposing my most personal side and putting my body and my sexual desires on display for someone I didnât know. I imagined them watching me pleasuring myself, and it fueled my lust. I explored myself in ways that I never had done before, as if someone was watching me right then and there. That little camera, just sitting motionless in front of me, recording every detail, every second, causing me to find pleasure that I never knew existed.