couple."
I nodded. "A man of honor. I like that. I can live with those terms." We would settle the remaining terms over the next three days.
***
So at about noon today, Bono and I stood together by a giant palm frond.
"Show me the fifty bucks," Bono said. "I'll use it on my date with the target."
"Only if she gives you the digits," I reminded him, flashing the twenty and three tens. "But you'd better have your own money ready for when you lose." Since he was taking the risk (and because I expected to learn a thing or two no matter what the outcome) Bono's end was smaller. If he lost he had to buy me lunch and give me a free run down of what he'd learned from the pickup community.
If he won, he'd take my $50 and offer to teach me everything he knew for another $150.
If he could manage this I'd pay him for his success. I'd pay him for his wisdom. I'd pay him extra to never call the "target's" phone number. I think he was looking for students or acolytes. But I wasn't interested in his techniques. I only wanted the woman at the other end of this bet. Two hundred dollars was a significant amount of money to a poor college student like me, but I had some meager savings I was willing to touch. I'd thought about this for a long long time. She was more than worth the risk. Sooner or later I was going to risk everything.
Bono and I stood there, an odd couple among the glossy passersby, in the food court of the high end Courtiers Place Mall. The big name shops and exclusive boutiques were all that could bear the rent of the neighborhood. The clientele were there to be seen celebrating spring's arrival. They strutted the mall with short skirts and expansive necklines. It was the catwalk for moneyed people and their children. Bono and I would only be there for jobs.
He would've been shorter than my 6 feet even if he weren't stooped over. His black hair hung long where my sandy brown hair looked rich and full cut short. I had a lean build from the high school swim team. I wore newish clothes that showed my bare arms and indicated the lean musculature of my body. My companion hid his build with a loose T-shirt under a dark fall jacket and wide legged pants and black boots. He stuck out more than me in these surroundings. Standing close to him I could see that the ensemble was clean, ironed and arranged with care. He called it "peacocking," and I wanted to do the exact opposite today. I couldn't afford to be noticed when Bono went to work.
"So which one will it be?" he asked. I could see excitement in his face. I couldn't help but like the guy as his breathing picked up, and I could see some vulnerability there.
I looked around and then at my watch. "Give me a minute now." I knew she liked to get to the mall about half an hour before her friend's lunch break just in case she got out early.
"Look, if you chicken shit out of this I'm still gonna want that fifty bucks, so you might as well pick someone and watch how I do what I do. Don't waste either of our time."
That is when I saw her enter the mall. She was not a particularly tall woman, but her cream colored heels would have brought her forehead up even to my nose. Her legs were shining, lean, bare and tan all the way up to mid-thigh where the hem of her dress stopped. The pastel floral print on the white dress fluttered to the scissoring of her thighs. She walked in like she owned the place, chin high and smiling. The dress pinched in at her narrow waistline and then spread as it rose to cup her chest. It was an admirable chest. There was nothing artificial or gargantuan, but it formed a respectable cleavage at the neckline. (I knew that I was looking at a pair of 36-Cs, but I wasn't going to invite questions about how I knew such a thing.) Shiny golden blond hair puddled on her bronze shoulders and spilled over the collar bones. Her arms swung as she walked with purpose. Their shape and smoothness showed a familiarity with swimming as much as my own build did. She used the swimming pool in the backyard, I knew, almost every day. Her jaw line was broad, and her cheekbones were like ping pong balls. She resembled a model I'd found on the internet called Melissa Giraldo aged to 35 or so, and this woman was in her 40's. Her sex appeal was beyond dispute, but she exuded confidence and friendliness most models have to fake.
"That's her. In the floral dress. That's her." I said, almost to myself.
Bono looked at her, but he didn't seem to see her. Most guys' jaws drop when they first see this woman. Their eyes bug out. The idea of hitting on her seems out of the question. She was so far beyond Bono's league that I expected him to crap his pants and pay me fifty bucks as an apology. But...nothing. He just watched her walk to the frozen yogurt place and get in line.
"Well?" I said.
"Yeah," he said turning to look at me. "She's pretty."
"No shit, she's pretty Bono. Are you going to make your move or are you buying me lunch? Though, I'm not so sure I'll want your advice if you're afraid to even try."
He smiled at me, a master in his element...at least in his own mind. "Afraid, Donny?"
"Don't call me that," I growled.
"Donald?"
"No,"
you fucking idiot
my face must have read. "My name is not Donald or Donny. Don. Just Don."
"Sorry, man. Ease up!" He slapped my right shoulder. I looked over and saw the floral dress second in line. She would place her order in a few dozen seconds, and Bono was smirking at me like he had all the time in the world. "Relax, Don. I'm not afraid of pretty girls. You've seen the last few girls I've dated."
I had. They were stunning, but... "That's no girl over there."
The supposed pick up artist just rolled his eyes. Then he gave me a warm smile, and said, "Yeah, I can see that. She's a hot cougar. Hot females stopped scaring me a long time ago." I looked over to the Yogurt place. She was placing her order. Bono was still talking. "You can beat your fear of them too. I can show you how for just..."
"Skip the infomercial. Are you going in or are you bailing?"
He glanced at the woman. It was like he was watching children playing in the park. "Don. Have some decency, man. Let the woman at least get her yogurt first."
"She's getting it right now."
"Let's see if she's going to sit down at a table to enjoy her sweet treat or if she's taking it on the go." Then Bono began strolling in her direction. He looked around at everyone there, not just the swimsuit model look-alike. I could have told him that she would sit, that she was meeting a friend who ran one of the boutiques at the mall. But I wasn't going to let him know that I knew so much about her. He didn't want that sort of information anyway.
He took his time when he saw her cruising the eating area, looking for an empty table. She sat down at a two-seater. He waited for her to have a spoonful of her treat before moving in.
I ducked down behind the broad leaves of a tropical plant. I could see her looking at him, but heard nothing of his patter.
He positioned his body turned 45 degrees away from her and gesturing back to where we had been standing. She looked around him to our original lookout, and back at him. He looked over, and saw I was gone. He shrugged, and said something that made her laugh. He turned away from her and back towards her again. She was smiling and nodding. Her luminous smile never faded. After a few minutes, Bono squatted down to be at her eye level, but refrained from sitting in the empty second seat. She laughed again. I couldn't believe my eyes. He moved his hands quite a bit in small slow motions. She spoke to him with a calm expression, and seemed to ponder questions before answering. His hand was on the empty chair, but he still did not sit. He touched her hand to make some point, and if she noticed she didn't show it. She looked around, maybe for her friend or an escape. He stood up, and took a half step away from her. He looked over his shoulder, but then turned to her again. She smiled as he spoke, but at the end her lips pressed together and she shook her head. He said something, and she replied with a polite smile. He clowned a bit like something had struck him, hand on forehead and staggering back a little bit. This elicited a real laugh from her. She nodded smiled and said something; a single word or two at most. He stood near her for a little while longer. He pointed at the empty chair with one hand and back in my approximate direction at the same time. She shook her head with hesitation. Her smile never left her face, but as he continued to speak, she shook her head three more times. He was done. He said some kind of friendly goodbye. She smiled as she sent him on his way.
This exchange left me both disappointed and thrilled. I would have loved it if Bono had shown that he could do it because that would mean he might just be able to show me how. But then it might have gotten sticky convincing him to leave her the hell alone. His failure said good things about her that I'd already assumed, but it also meant that he wouldn't be able to teach me everything I needed to know. Then again, I knew that I could use this incident to serve my own ends. Lunch time was coming, and I knew that useful information would follow either from Bono or from my mother at home.
