[Author's Note: This is the
final chapter
of an ongoing saga of a young woman uncovering the mystery of her family's past. This chapter contains
major spoilers
for those who have not read earlier chapters. If continuity is important to you, it's highly recommended that you read the earlier chapters before this one. Otherwise, please enjoy.]
Chapter 15 - Success Is The Best Revenge
I stood in front of the mirror, my hands resting on the edge of the counter. I admired my handiwork, and had to admit that the transformation was astounding. I barely looked like myself.
Then again, that was the whole point.
Almost three months had passed since that fateful night where Tracy had humiliated me and Andrew had taken my anal virginity. I knew that for the rest of my life I would see that as the turning point, the moment that I would always look back upon and know that I would never be the same person ever again.
Now, as I looked at the strange image in the reflection, I knew that this night would be another pivotal one for the record books. I was barely recognizable - which was, of course, the whole point. I felt as if I was dressed up for Halloween, but this was going to be a trick
and
treat if I could pull it off.
There was still time to back out, to go back to the milquetoast wimp that I was just three months earlier. I could take off the makeup, fix my hair, change my clothes, and no one would be the wiser of my plans. It could remain a nice fantasy, a "what if Shannon had had the balls to go through with it,"
coulda-been-a-contendah
moment.
I looked at the time. I only had forty-five minutes. If everything went according to plan, that was all the time I had to finish the job. There was still so much that could go wrong, especially when you count on other people to do what they were supposed to do, to be sure. But if my plan actually worked, that was all the time I had.
I swallowed, and butterflies swarmed in my stomach. Once I walked out that door, once I went down the stairs to my father's living room, once he
saw
me - there would be no turning back.
I didn't realize it was going to be this difficult to muster up the courage. I had planned this moment down to the smallest possible detail. Hell, I had
trained
for this. Every day. It had consumed my every waking moment, my entire being. I had held a secret double life that no one - not even Andrew, bless him - knew about.
All for
this
.
It's not going to work
, Team Morality warned, ever the optimist.
You have to do this
, Team Shutupandfuckme countered.
You're going to lose him forever.
TM was up for the debate.
If you don't
,
you'll lose him anyway.
Team SUAFM argued.
If you wimp out now, both Tracy and Simone will win. All of this, all of their torment and torture, everything they did to you - they'll get away with it all
.
You really will be their bitch for the rest of your life.
Team Morality didn't seem to have another counter-argument.
They need to pay
, Team SUAFM pressed onward.
They didn't just do this to you, they manipulated your father, too! You aren't the only one suffering here.
I looked directly into my eyes in the mirror, my glasses-less contact lenses showing piercing green eyes without distraction. My brows knitted together in determination. You build to a moment and you either grab it, or you let it slip away and be gone forever and suffer the consequences of your indecision.
Team Morality was sold.
Fuck them
.
Pushing the last remnants of my nerves aside, I threw my fists out like a boxer preparing to enter the ring. My new hairstyle felt top-heavy. I had practiced this a couple of times before, trying to get the hairspray right. It felt solid and secure, but I was afraid that I would mess up my look if I bounced too much, so I stopped bouncing.
I nodded at my reflection, adjusted the little clothing I had on, and did one last check to make sure that everything was perfect. I opened the door, and strode out into the hallway with purpose. Every step and movement was fueled by pure, unadulterated attitude.
Showtime
.
I sauntered to the top of the stairs and my father came into view. It dawned on me that this was exactly the same position I had been in when I watched Tracy and my father fuck that first night, those three months ago. Then, I had been hiding behind the banister, afraid of getting caught.
There was no time to be nostalgic. I had to keep my head in the game. Right now, being seen was the whole point.
Everything
was about
look at me, motherfucker!
This was the moment where if it was going to go haywire, it would happen right now. I had planned everything to the last possible detail - the number of drinks for him to have (enough to loosen his inhibitions but not enough for him to pass out), the position of him on the couch to see my entrance, the exact time of day.
He could very well reject me, tell me to go clean myself up, and it would all be ruined. In fact, it was impossible to calculate all the different ways it could go south. The only way - the
only
way this was going to work was if I did it through sheer will and determination.
And, of course,
attitude
.
The previous three months built to this moment. Weeks of dedication, planning, conniving and plotting. I had played possum, pretended to be defeated while plotting my revenge in secret. So much pressure culminated in one single moment in time. My heart was pounding in my chest, and I felt a nervousness so violent it threatened to shake me apart. I needed to put on a mask of control, of determination.
After this moment, there would be no safety net. No going back. If I showed even a hint of hesitation, it would be all over, and three months of pain, hard work, determination, and deception would be for
nothing