There are many aphrodisiacs, and loneliness is one of them. So the words and pictures in my head were mostly fantasy as I grew up. Being shy meant that I didn't go out with many girls and I ended up spending more time with my mother than any other female. Her name is Dora and she was amazing. And not only because I realized that she was hot. Some of my fondest childhood memories are of mom reading stories and poems to me while we sat on my bed. And it was always a comfort knowing that I could come to her when I needed to.
At this point in my life I can't remember when or how the physical attraction I felt towards her began. It must have started small. Perhaps it was the electricity that ran through me when I inadvertently caught a flash of her breasts while she was changing. I know I was fascinated by the large rosy nipples that capped the smooth full flesh. Maybe it was the shape of her legs, or the way her tail moved when she walked. Or maybe it was just her smile, because when it shined on me, it made me feel loved and wanted.
I guess once my sexual fantasies started revolving around her, and I accepted the fact that I wanted my mother, I stopped fighting it. I stopped judging it; that was just the way I was.
On the surface, we had what looked like a normal mother-son relationship, until the day I graduated from high school. It was like the beginning of that book we had to read in English class that talked about the worst of times and the best of times. That's what that day was like for me.
A lot of my friends weren't virgins by the time prom night came, but I still was. I guess I'd had some opportunities for both professional and non-professional sex, but I'd been too shy, too broke, or too anxious to do it. Having sex for the first time on your worst night is not such a good combination.
I was going out with a girl named Caryn for only a few weeks, and only because I worked up the nerve to ask her to the prom, and only because a friend said that she had told them that she would say 'Yes.'
After the dance, a few couples went to her house since her parents weren't home. We ended up in a room alone and after some initial fumbling, I knew that we were getting to the moment of truth. She put her hand down my pants and I was nervous. It was actually the first time a girl had my bare cock in her hand. It didn't help that she kept saying, "What's wrong with you?"
When I finally relaxed enough to get hard, Caryn lifted her dress and took down her panties. She put me inside her and after a few strokes she said, "Make sure you don't come in me." Being excited, nervous, and worried, is not a good state of mind, and before I knew it, I pulled out and came all over her dress. She was pissed. I started to apologize and she said, "Just get the hell out of here."
When I got home I was as dejected as I thought I could ever be. Mom was still up. She said, "Richie, what are you doing home so early?"
I said, "I don't know, it was just time to come home."
She wasn't buying. "Richie, did something happen? Are you okay?"
"I'm fine mom..." Fine my ass. I was feeling terrible.
She said, "Come on baby, you can talk to me, can't you?" I always had, but nothing as intimate as this. I didn't care. I told her what happened. At first she was aghast that I didn't use a condom and she made me promise to always use one.
I said, "Okay, but I don't think I'm ever going to have a chance."
She smiled and said, "It happens, don't worry about it, you'll have plenty of opportunities." She saw how despondent I was and beckoned me to the couch. I sat by her and she wrapped her arms around me and my head rested at the top of her breast.
She kissed the top of my head and I kissed the skin just above the V of her blouse. She said, "Everything's going to be fine baby." The close contact and the fragrance of her skin started me breathing hard and getting hard. I kept kissing until I moved the material aside and my lips were on the soft material of her bra. She said, "Richie..."
I wasn't sure how she was saying it, but she was stroking my hair and I said, "Mom, please let me." I cupped her tit and kept kissing it over her bra.
She said, "Oh honey, we shouldn't be doing this." I didn't say anything. At that moment I thought about my father who was away for the weekend. I knew how much he cheated on her, and I didn't give a damn about him. I was only thinking about mom and how turned on I was. I reached under her bra and exposed her boob. I was only inches from the big nipple I had had seen years before.
Mom said, "Oh God Richie..." I looked at her, and her eyes mesmerized me because of her enlarged pupils. I didn't wait for her to say anything more. I held her breast in my hand and began to gently massage it. Her face flushed and she said, "Ohh..." as my thumb moved over the thickened tip of her nipple. She didn't stop me; she only closed her eyes.
I felt her hand on mine as she cupped her breast. She urged my head toward it and I took the large areola and nipple into my mouth. I sucked as she moaned. I ran my tongue over the little bumps around the rubbery tip and then sucked harder while mom's fingers drew tightly on my hair.
After a few minutes I brought my lips to hers and rested on them. Her mouth and tongue moved almost imperceptively at first. I pressed my fingers deeper into the heavy flesh of her breast and the kiss became passionate. Things intensified quickly as we reached and found each other. Between the kissing and touching, we managed to get most of our clothes off.
When her panties came off and I saw her pussy for the first time, I was in awe. The best way I can describe it is that it looked perfect, a gentle mound with soft rosy folds, slightly hidden by fine hair. I was stiff and aching to be inside it. I said, "I want you mom."
Even though we were both almost naked by then, it was a still something of a surprise to me that she said, "Yes, baby."
Then it hit me what was about to happen. I said, "Mom..." as I felt myself tense.
I guess mom did too and she said, "It's okay love." She kissed me for a while and held my cock without jerking it. She threw some of the pillows off the couch to make room for us and then she urged me on top of her as she spread her legs. She guided me to her opening.
I panicked for a moment and said, "Mom I don't have a condom."
She said, "You don't need one with me baby." My cock slid through the soft skin into the sweet forbidden warmth of my mother's pussy, and when I reached the point of being solidly inside her I said, "Mom, this is all I ever wanted to do." She didn't say anything.
I stroked once, long and deep, and she said, "Ahhh..."
In my inexperience I wasn't sure what it meant and I said, "Is it okay mom?"
She said, "It's more than okay baby." I saw she was smiling. Her eyes closed and she continued smiling as I pressed my hardness in and out of her pussy. The smile stayed on her lips. She said, "You're doing good baby, just go slow." You can't imagine how I felt. I had been so concentrated on how I would feel being inside her, it almost didn't enter my mind how she would feel.
When I realized it, I said, "Mom, I want to make you feel good."
She said, "You are baby, you are; having you inside me is making me feel wonderful...yes baby, do that, move like that...ahhh..."
As I stroked, she kept saying, "Ahhh..." Actually it was more that she was breathing the word than saying it. "Ahhh...ahhh..." I'd never heard anything so exciting in all my life. I told myself to slow down or else I would come, even though, at the same time, that was exactly what I wanted to do.
I was in a state of disbelief even though I began to realize the sensations I was experiencing. I thought about how hard my straining cock was inside her, and then I focused on the wetness that was allowing me to push in and out of her. I said, "Dora, you're so beautiful...it's so good."
I perceived her body moving to stay in rhythm with mine as we reached for each other. I had never doubted my mother's love for me, but I did doubt the chances of having my unconventional desires fulfilled. And yet, Dora was under me with her legs open. "OH Yes..." I said in a loud whisper. I was inside my mom's pussy, making love to her.
I drove in deep and she responded with her hips, moving me inside her. After a few minutes, she wrapped her legs around my waist and took a stream of air through her lips as I found myself in her as far as I could go. I felt something at the tip of my cock and mom whimpered a small cry. It became a moan that gradually rose in pitch and volume, as I began stroking her harder, and faster. Not that I knew what I was doing, and not that I could have been doing anything different.
My body took over and as I plunged into the depths of my mother's pussy. Each stroke was an experience unto itself. Her wet warmth encircled my flesh as the shaft slid along the walls of her vagina. I wanted to do it a thousand times before coming. I told myself to relax and stroked her for much longer than I would have thought possible. It wasn't until she urgently said, "Richie...Richie," and pulled me into her that I realized that I too was about to come. Amazingly, I had the presence of mind to wonder if I could release inside her. I think I said something like, "Mom can I come...?"
She understood and said, "Yes baby, come inside me, yes, yes." I drove and moved in and out of her as fast as my hips could move and when the first cord fired out of me, mom said, "OHHHHhhhhhh..." I don't know how many fusillades poured into her as she continued making that sound. Her pussy, lubricated with my cum made wet sounds as I continued driving and shooting into her.
We collapsed in each others arms and I whispered, "Dora, Dora..." as she gently kissed my face and eyes until we both fell asleep.
I woke up about an hour later and saw that mom was up and looking at me. I was hard. She smiled and I went to embrace her warm body. I kissed her neck and reached down to rub her pussy. She stopped me. She said, "Honey no; we can't."
I stopped. I said, "I wasn't good for you, was I mom?"
She said, "Sweetheart, you know that's not true. You were...It was good for both of us. Please listen to me..." How could I listen? Her naked body was within reach and I wanted her so badly. She said, "I don't want to say that what happened was a mistake, because it was beautiful, but honey, we can't keep doing it...we can't."
I got agitated and quickly said, "Mom, what's wrong with two people loving each other, who cares what other people..."
"No baby," she said. "I don't mean that; it has nothing to do with other people, it has to do with us."
I thought it was about my father and I said, "Well if this about your so called husband, I can tell you..."
She stopped me and said, "Baby, there's nothing you can tell me about him, I know what he does, I know that he cheats and that's why I stopped sleeping with him...which is probably one of the reasons this happened..." She smiled and touched my face. "I haven't felt the warmth of someone loving me for a long time."
I said, "I love you mom." This was not the 'Love ya' that I always said when we got off the phone, or when we said goodbye. This was "I love you," and she heard the difference.
"Oh sweetheart," she said, "I love you, and I'll always love you, but besides my being your mother, we're at different stages of our lives, our experiences, our needs...we have to be realistic. This was a wonderful accident that happened for a lot of reasons, but there are a lot more reasons why it shouldn't have. You may not believe it at this moment because you're still eighteen, but there's more to a relationship than sex, and you need someone who's right for you now. It would be the wrong thing for both of us to continue this, even if you weren't my son. You need someone to build a life with...have children with...grow with."
"Mom, I love you, I..."
"I know you do, and I love you more than anything and anyone, and I'll always treasure what we shared, but I realized something important tonight, that I have to move on, and so do you. Honey, this can't be..." I thought I saw tears welling in her eyes, but she smiled and said, "You'll always be my love." We talked for hours, but in the end, mom was not going to change her mind.
For the next few weeks I tried to talk to her about what had happened, but we both ended up saying the same things. I knew that mom wrote some poetry and read romance novels that bordered on the erotic, so I took a chance and showed her two websites that had stories and poems of loving incest, where the people were able to work things out. She seemed interested and spent some time reading, but it didn't change anything. Nothing I did or said changed anything.
It was within a month that both mom and I moved out. She got an apartment, started divorce proceedings and I went away early to the school I was to attend in the fall. I went to see her on holidays and some long weekends and we spoke on the phone almost every day. You can't un-ring a bell, so what happened between us showed up in a smile or a touch, but we didn't talk about it or repeat it.
That night stayed with me as more than a memory. It gave me a new confidence with women and I had mom to thank for that. For the next eight months I dated more regularly, and even had sex with three of girls, but mom was on my mind even when I was with them. One of the girls named Juliana gave me a much needed education. I guess you could say that she was orally obsessed and I found out how to please a woman. By the time the fire went out between us, I became pretty good at it.
It was a Friday when I saw the poem. I was looking at one of the erotic websites when I saw a listing for a new poem called "The Greed of Desire." The author was listed as Richmom37. My head swam. 'No way' I thought, even if my mother was thirty-seven. I read the poem.
Desire is hungry; it wants, and it only lives to want.
That's how I crave him.
Not said with pride, nor shame,
Driven only by the dark forces from within.
