Chapter Three - The Escape
I was right, going to Pauls wouldn't solve anything, and it didn't.
The weekend I spent there was one full of distraction and barely cognisant awareness. I was lost in a sea of memories, memories of her.
I could still feel here laughter as I spent myself inside her mouth. I could still see the complete and utter adoration as she looked me in the eyes, a warm hand,
her
warm hand upon my face.
But worst of all, I could still feel the unpleasant and yet somehow very pleasant twisting my stomach was doing at the very thought of her.
She was right, she didn't need to come and try to convince me anymore. My fucked up thoughts were doing that for her. My body ached for her again, to be touched, to be looked at with such love that it nearly made me, a fully grown man weep.
And yet somehow, someway, a small stubborn part of me still had the power to refuse. A part that Sophie and I both shared long before we fucked.
It was screaming at me to defy these fucked up feelings. It was screaming at me to rise up, to show her that I wasn't some lovesick plaything, that I
did
and
could
push my emotions to the side and make a logical, morally approved choice.
And when I got back from Pauls and noticed that Sophie was absent from the house, I made said choice in all of a few moments.
I picked up my phone, I dialled in a number I'd once decided I had no need of. And after a bare few rings passed me by...
"Hello, my name is James. You rang a few months ago about that room you had available down in...yes in that place. Is it still available?"
A few beats passed me by as the man on the other side of the phone ruffled through some sheets.
"It is?!" I exclaimed, wincing as my enthusiasm all but burst out of me. "Sorry, I've just been really looking forward to getting my own place you know. Can't live with my folks forever, they've got lives of their own, right?"
A few chuckles from the man and a promise to email me over the necessary documents was promised, the phone disconnected and I took...a big breath.
And then my heart caught in my chest as I realized two things.
One, I was really going to move out and live by myself.
Two, that I'd have to announce it to both my parents while somehow keeping Sophie out of the loop.
...or did I have to?
Did I have to keep her out of the loop? Where I was going was quite a way aways from my parents home after all. If I just gave a general location as opposed to the exact one, she'd never be able to find me.
And give or take a few months, we'd finally forget all that had happened between us and move on.
Right?
'I have to be right...'
....
....
....
It was later that week that I decided to join my folks downstairs. The familiar smell of fajitas was in the air. I could hear my mom making fun of something my dad had said, but in truth it all became background noise as I entered the dining room and saw my sister sitting at the table.
She didn't turn to face me, not right away. And it was in this brief moment in time that my eyes seemed to take the entirety of her appearance in.
Her curly brown hair seemed to flow down to her shoulders with a kind of mythical ease. Her eyes were dancing with mirth as she watched mom and dad verbally tussle. She wasn't wearing anything spectacular, on the contrary she was simply in her teddy bear pyjamas.
A top and loose bottoms, that was all, a cute ensemble for a cute girl. And yet all I could think of in that moment was how goddamn gorgeous she looked.
And as she turned to face me, her eyes lighting up with a love nobody but me would understand was NOT familial, I felt my body react as it had done all the days since we'd accidentally had sex.
My skin become heated, tingly. My breath eased out of whatever nerves I had as my brain readily took in the obvious adoration she was giving me. My dick went from turtle to chub in all of a second, with the threat of becoming so much more.
"Hey James," she said, a smile on her face as she turned her whole body towards me. A thing that in that moment I doubted she was even aware of.
"H-Hey Sophie," I replied, forcing myself to smile back as the nerves that'd vanished reappeared with the force of a truck. "You alright?"
I noticed it straight away. Her smile, the smile that reached her eyes began to tilt downwards, the joyful light in her eyes dimming.
I don't know how, but she
knew
something was coming. She
knew
I was going to say something that to her, would be truly terrible.
"Peachy," she murmured, her face creased with concern. "Are you alright?"
"Yep."
This time even our parents, if they'd deigned to look at us, would've been able to see the frown on Sophie's face. Hell they'd have probably realized just how bloody nervous I was too.
Thankfully, they were more enamoured with their verbal joust and the cooking than the two of us.
She began to stand up.
"Sit down Sophie," Mom said, an eyebrow raised as she finally looked at the both of us, before shrugging. "Dinner will be ready in two minutes, there's no point going anywhere. You sit down too, James."
"Sure thing, Mom," I muttered, doing my upmost to avoid Sophie's eyes as I mentally prepared myself for what must have been the eighth time.
Eventually the food was served and we all dug in. I was using the tasty distraction to avoid looking at Sophie, but I knew that I could only delay my news for so long.
And so once all was done and we were finished eating did I clear my throat for everybody's attention.
"So um, I got an announcement to make," I began, carefully avoiding Sophie's gaze as I focused on my folks instead. "I've decided that since I've got more than enough in the bank and I'm not exactly getting any younger...to, well, I've decided to move out."
My mom blinked before smiling at me warmly, a part of me twinging at how much she looked like Sophie.
"Are you sure sweetheart?" she asked, concern upon her face. "You don't have to move out if you don't want to. Honestly there's no rush."
"I know," I answered quickly. "I just...I feel like I need to have my own space, you know?"
Dad chuckled and put his arm around Mom. "Don't fret so much dear, James is simply becoming a man. And a man needs his space at his age." He turned to look at me, a proud glint in his eye. "Have you got everything sorted, paperwork, funds and such?"
I nodded, unable to resist smiling back at the both of them as their proud expressions warmed my soul.
"Good lad," Dad chuckled, nodding once. "Well, don't think that your mother and I won't help you get settled into wherever your new place is."
"And you can always call us if you need anything," Mom interjected. "Whether it's food or if you're a bit low for the rent. We'll help you however we can."
Honestly I was a bit stumped on how to respond. The love they had for me was as obvious and brutal as I'd ever seen it. It took more than I care to admit not to well up with tears.
"Oh this is wonderful, don't you think so Sophie?" Mom asked, turning to face her daughter.
For the first time since I'd entered the dining room, I looked at my sisters face. She looked...stunned and for the briefest of moments as our eyes met, I saw the pure underlying hurt in her eyes as she understood why I was doing this.
But then it was gone, replaced by a smile that if I didn't know any better, I'd truly believe in.
"It's certainly a surprise," she said, that smile permanently fixed on her face. "W-Where did you say you were moving to?"
I fought back a shudder as her suddenly cold eyes met mine, and told them all the place, but not the exact location of where I was moving to.
"U-huh," Sophie intoned, blinking slowly before swallowing and standing up. "I need to go to the bathroom, back in a min."
"Well that was odd," Dad said, eyebrow quirked at the door Sophie had left through and closed behind her. "I thought she'd be happy for you James."
"Oh, I think someone's a little upset that he's moving away is all," Mom explained, patting Dad's hand comfortingly. "Don't worry, once she realizes how much more space she has with you gone, she'll probably be thanking you."
Mom turned to look at me and gestured with her head. "Your dad and I are going to go next door and see Sandra and Clive for a nightcap. In the meantime I think you should go and comfort your little sister, don't you?"
'I think I'll probably get slapped if I go near her right now.'
"Sure thing, Mom."
I knew they'd both be having said nightcap for a few hours, which was both a relief and yet not a relief.
Regardless, I left the table and made my way upstairs. Strangely enough her room was open and vacant, she wasn't inside. Confused, I made my way over to my room and opened to door.
Only to be pulled inside and thrown roughly onto my bed.
"The fuck?!"
I sat up and looked at my clearly furious sister walking towards me, her beathing heavy and sharp.
"My thoughts exactly, James," she whispered harshly, every word coming out as if forced kicking and screaming. "What the fuck do you mean you're moving out?"
Emboldened by my own anger at being tossed about, I stood up and met her furious expression with my own.
"You know exactly what I'm doing by moving out, Soph," I ground out, ignoring her eyes as they narrowed dangerously. "I'm getting as far away from you and this...this
