My Teddy Bear

Thanks again to radlas1984 for editing support - I am in your debt!

Any character featuring in a sexual situation in this story is over the age of 18.

***

"Aye hen, what's up?" He sounds sleepy. It's early morning and I've obviously just woken him. Ted set off for work half an hour ago and I've not been able to sleep since. It's two days after we got back from Manchester, and the suspicions that had been forming in my mind have turned into certainties. The signs are becoming clearer: drowsiness, mood swings, and it's been building gradually but by now my boobs are increasingly sore and tender.

"Chip I really need to talk to you."

"Well I'm awake now, on you go."

I almost choke on the words. "I think... I think I'm pregnant." It comes out like a whispered hiss. I'm petrified of someone in the house overhearing, but also simply afraid of admitting it to myself.

He whistles. "Well congratulations girl. Teddy's, I assume? No other lucky gentleman ye've been sneakin' out to see? Wow. A wee babby Claire. How're ye feelin' about it? I'm guessin' this wasnae planned."

"Of course it wasn't planned," I snap at him. "It has to have been the first time: I ran out of pills shortly after getting home and at the time, didn't think there was any prospect of needing them. That day it was all so overwhelming I barely even thought of the risk. Ever since we've been using protection. I took a morning after pill but couldn't get hold of one for nearly three days so it must have been too late."

"This was... how long ago? Three weeks?"

"Nearly. 19 days."

"You taken a test?"

"I'm not supposed to until three weeks after the morning after pill. The hormones aren't detectable until then, or something. I have a test for when its time." I recovered one among my other things from the flat. Almost expired, but still valid. "It's now about five or six weeks since I came off the pill, and I had no period in that time before I slept with him. This past week my boobs are so sore, and I'm not feeling sick but my appetite's growing." Even with Charlie, I don't mention the changing discharge. Some things don't need to be discussed with men. "I'm sleepy all the time and I've been snapping at stupid stuff - even at him."

"Ye might be about to have the period then." Charlie was always unusually relaxed and knowledgeable about these matters. A combination of being utterly at ease with human sexuality, and being a laser-focused scientist. "'Specially considering yer hormones are still gonna be way aff normal."

"I know Chip... I've been trying to tell myself this non stop. But..."

"But ye jest *know*, aye?"

"I just know."

"A mother's intuition is rarely wrong," He trills. An absurd singsong imitation of a prim Victorian Lady. I laugh despite myself.

"Fuck you Chip, don't you dare call me a mother yet."

"What are ye gonna do?"

Sudden tears. "I don't know. I have a million thoughts. Could I even keep it? I don't want to curse a child to being an inbred genetic mistake."

He sounds thoughtful. "Well ye don't know that. Genetics are complex, but they have rules. Ye won't create problems out of thin air just 'cause it's yer brother who's the daddy."

"I thought you were a chemist," I rudely interject.

"Aye hen, I am. But I've done a lot o' Biology in my time too. Believe it or not, recessive genes and inheritability is a big deal even in high school Bio." He pauses, thinking. "Basically the danger is that you and he share a lot of the same genes. That means that if there's a dangerous recessive genetic disorder in yer family history there's a higher than usual chance that ye'll both have the genes for that, and therefore much greater risk of that disorder being inherited by the child."

"That sounds bad."

"Right, obviously it can be. But what I mean is if there isn't a disorder like that in yer genome, it won't suddenly appear out of naewhere. I think if ye get yersel screened for genetic disorders, you should be able to get a good idea of how safe or risky it will be. Ye can get the embryo screened too I think."

"Does that mean... I'll have to tell a doctor who the father is?"

"Tha's probably unwise. You could get a pretty certain result by screening both of ye, but getting that done could look suspicious. I think if *ye're* clear, then I don't think it should matter if Ted's got some of those pesky genes anyway as recessive traits need both parents to have it." A few moments of silence. "May I make an observation, hen?"

"Mm?"

"I think, by askin' these questions, ye're tellin' me that ye want this baby."

I can barely hear myself say it, much less believe the words are coming. "I think so too."

"Does he know yet? Do you know what *he* wants?"

"I haven't told him. I don't know what he wants but I don't imagine fatherhood aged 20 is what he had in mind. 'Specially with me."

"I think ye should tell him, Claire." His voice is uncharacteristically gentle. "At the very least, he'll want to help figure out a way through. And ye shouldnae be alone wi' this."

***

It's late. I don't know what time. I've woken up after an intense dream. One of the increasingly frequent baby dreams I've been having. After speaking to Charlie, the moment hadn't been right to tell him, but waking up now I can't bear to keep it from him any longer. I look at him in the moonlight. He's peaceful, breathing softly, but I really need to tell him. I reach out to his shoulder and he stirs towards me.

"Ted, I need to tell you something." My voice feels small, but sounds so loud in the silence.

"Mhm." It takes him a few moments to stir, but then, voice alert. "Yeah?"

"Teddy... I think..." Nerves. My pulse is frantic. "I think we made a baby. That first time."

He stiffens. A very long silence.

"Ted I need you to say something." He sighs. "Please say something." I'm pleading.

"I'm sorry Pips... I just... Well I guess it's not fair for me to feel this." He swallows. "I can't help feeling that it's just my luck."

"*Your* luck? What do you mean?" I can't help keep my voice from cracking. Becoming shrill.

"That's why Steph and I split up. We were trying. Or I thought we were. But I found out a bit later that she'd had an abortion. At least one. I really thought we wanted a child." I gasp, and reach out to him; small hand on his naked chest. "And now you too. Of course you'll get rid of it because I'm your brother."

I feel that like a kick in my gut. My hand tenses. More silence while I grapple with what he's said and with myself. "No, Teddy, I think... maybe... I'm happy." I start to cry.

"Happy?" He turns to me, folding me into his arms. "Happy to be having *my* baby?" I'm sobbing. I can't reply verbally, but I nod, my head gently rocking against his chest. I'm drawing myself closer into him. "Wow Pipsi, I'm not..." Kisses. "Well, just wow."

My sobs are abating, soothed by his embrace, tense emotion flooding away, relief and excitement filling me in its place.

"Are *you* happy Ted? Do you want to be a dad to an incestuous oops baby? You might have wanted a child with Steph but this will be very different. There's all sorts of risks, and the secrecy... "

"I want a family, Claire. I know I'm young but I want to be a young dad. I want to be strong and healthy when my kids are adults, I want to be active and lively with them." I guess that Steph didn't feel the same way, and I think about how much it must have hurt him to realise that they were in different places. I could empathise with her, but having considered abortion myself in the last few days, I had discovered strong feelings against wanting to end my own pregnancy. After a few moments of pause, Ted continues: "I've been so... content with life that I don't know why I'd want to wait. I love you so much I feel it in my lungs when I look at you, like you're the air I'm breathing. I want us to be a family." He gently touches my belly.

He's sitting up, back towards the wall, and I'm astride him, sitting in his lap with my legs curled around behind his bum. I've been looking at his face in the moonlight, but as he speaks, I close my eyes, and try to picture it. These are beautiful things he's saying. The images he's conjured up bring forth more tears, a hazy, happy future that I can almost believe could be real.

I tip my head to his chest again, feeling his pounding heart and flushing warmth. I was pretty sure I wanted this baby, but now I *know*. I want the life he is describing.

"We're really going to do this, aren't we Teddy Bear."

"I'm in if you want it too," he says, kissing the top of my head.

"You said *kids*... how many?"

He laughs. "No pressure Pips, I don't know. A few."

I sit up and jokingly wince, clutching at my nethers. "To me 'a few' is more than two and less than five. Quite a difference. Ouch. I'll have a lot to get used to."

"I agree that five sounds like too much," he grins at me. "But it's up to you - you have to do all the hard work after all. And we may change our minds when we deal with the reality of having one."

"I think we'll manage," I whisper, leaning in to kiss him, then rest my forehead against his, thinking. "I can probably cope with two but I can't promise more than that."

"Is it wrong that I find you saying that incredibly sexy?" His voice is breathy.

"I find it sexy that you find it sexy."

"'Promising' a second pregnancy before the first even starts to show... Bold move Pipsi."

"It's probably my hormones. I've been rushing with crazy feelings for days."

"I wish you'd told me baby," he whispers. "It's too much to deal with all this by yourself."

"I know," and I start to sob. A spike of sadness piercing the warm and fuzzy emotions all of a sudden. "I've been feeling like a mental case. Thank you for loving me, Teddy Bear."

His hands cup my aching breasts, already feeling swollen and heavy. They haven't yet actually grown, but I'm sure they will. His touch turns the soreness into pleasure, like a magical hormone switch, banishing the sadness as quickly as it appeared, and I moan into him. They are *so* sensitive! I lose myself in the sensations, his fingers squeezing, thumbs circling my nipples, supporting and kneading at the same time.

I feel him stiffening beneath me in response to my sounds of arousal. His cock begins to press upward against my pelvis, flat against my slit with the head nestling against my arsehole. My cunt is beginning to steam from the attention my boobs are getting, and I can feel his length getting slick from the contact.

I feel a thrill at the realisation that we no longer have to worry about protection. My love and hormones-addled brain clearly doesn't see the contradiction inherent there. It's like saying it's fine to leave the barn door open because the horses are long gone. But the motherly hormones have done their work, and well: slowly shifting my attitude towards acceptance of my pregnancy. By now it's becoming a fact in my brain, like a truth that's always been there. And my body desperately wants to feel my man's seed inside it again.

I briefly reach behind myself and push up with palms flat on the bed. The few extra inches of clearance allow his cock to spring up, almost in position, and it takes a tiny readjustment from one hand to angle it right. I buzz with contentment as I sink back down onto him, until my lips rest around his root, his bulk all the way inside and the sensation of his flared head resting gently against my cervix completes our union.

I had to pull away from the kiss to make the adjustment, so I return to it with intensity. I feel him shift slightly inside as I rock forwards, my muscles rippling to accommodate the movement, and the new angle settles when I'm pressed against him. His hands are reluctant to move, so they are now trapped between our chests, a strange bony layer in between that feels as awkward as it sounds.

"You'll have to let go..." I whisper into his ear after disengaging from his lips.

"Don't wanna," he complains in mock petulance.

"There are other places I'd like you to touch..."

"Show me."

I peel away from him slightly and take his hands in mine. I place one on my buttock and draw the other one down towards my pussy. It doesn't take a genius to get the message, and as he manages to find my clit with his outstretched thumb, I buckle from the twin sensations. The rest of his hand is resting above my womb, feeling like a protective shield for its precious contents. His thumb is drawing spasms out of my groin, sending them flaring about my body, up my spine and down my legs. My head flops down from a momentary loss of control, and I rest my cheek on his shoulder, panting into his neck. My arms are around his waist, hands splayed across the small of his back, tugging at his skin with little jerking movements as I'm carried along by the waves of pleasure.

I start rocking my hips, undulating back and forth with a slight rolling motion. I feel his stiffness shift inside, bumping against my tenderest places, as full as it's possible to be. His hand on my arse helps to guide me into a rhythm that is best for him, and while I'm concentrating on keeping it moving and on my own cresting pleasure, I feel him swell in that telltale way.

"You'd better get off soon," he grunts. "I'm getting close."

"We don't have to do that anymore, remember?" I gently remind him, remaining exactly where I am, flexing my muscles around him to further reinforce the message. I feel him leap inside in response, and a moan of contentment escapes his lips. I try to slow down my movements to buy a little more time for my orgasm to arrive, but it's too late: I feel his swelling reach its peak and the bursting, burning sensation of his seed against my cervix. He grunts again, head on my shoulder, overwhelmed by his release. I keep rocking, encouraging his completion, seeking to draw everything he has to give out. He manages to keep the movements of his thumb going against my clit despite his dumbstruck condition, and the peak of my climax crashes over me about half a minute after his. I slow, trembling around his softening hardness, tummy churning with the power and emotion of the moment. I'm gasping into his ear, my hands pulling us as close as can be, and gradually my movements cease. His arms come up behind my back, and we slowly slump backwards until he is on his knees and I'm lying flat beneath him.

His cock isn't hard, but it's not yet flaccid, and he thrusts experimentally a couple of times. Surprised by the motion I have a sudden flaring in my orgasmic sensations. A mini second peak, causing my legs to clench at his waist and deny his movement.

"Ahhhhhaaaaa," I exhale, like the breath is forced out of me by the surging tension in my body.

Finally, he can take no more, and withdraws. His seed spills out in his wake, flooding down over my arsehole and pooling against my bum. As he shifts away, I feel it spread out beneath me as it starts to soak into the bed sheets.

We roll onto our sides, easily slipping into our favoured spooning position, and hum happy noises at each other while we recover. He's got one hand on my boobs and the other on my belly, and I reach behind myself and pull his floppy cock forward to hold it between my thighs. My bum is pressed against his crotch and tummy, snugly folding me into the shape of him.

As our breathing slows and peace returns, I reluctantly remember that there's something important I need to say.

"You know, there are... dangers. Of us having a baby together."

"I know."

"It doesn't have to be as scary as it sounds. Someone explained it to me, the genetics of it. It's all about if we have a family history of genetic disorders. I've tried to do some research and I think there isn't any, but I'm going to get a screening done to make sure."

"I don't really know what that means," he sighs. "I trust you though. You're the clever one."

"Don't say that. You're really smart baby." I protectively place one hand over his. "I don't know any science, it's all from my friend."

"From Charlie, right?"

"Yeah, he's... well, I told him. I had to tell someone."

"Is he jealous?"

I laugh. That's a question that only someone who doesn't know Charlie could ask. "Trust me, that's *not* what you should be concerned about." I picture Chip in my mind, all the times he's practically panted with lust at the sight of photos of my brother.

"What do you mean?"

"Uh... he has a real thing. For you."

"For me!"

"Yep. Us being together is pretty much a wet dream for him. Don't worry though, he's respectful. He won't try anything, and now that we're together, he will keep his distance."

"He sounds like quite a guy. I only met him, what, once? Two years ago?"

"You made quite an impression on him."

"Wow I really didn't notice."

"I promise you Teddy, you don't have to worry about him. He and I have been through a lot together, I know how he works. No strings, genuinely."

He kisses my shoulder thoughtfully. "You don't want him to be involved though?"

"*No*," I say with vehemence. "I've had fun with him but my fondness for him is as a friend. I know it sounds weird, but we genuinely have the two relationships compartmentalised."

"I believe you Pips. Just making sure you're not denying yourself something you actually want. I'm not sure I could be cool with it, but if you-"

I shush him. "You're sweet Teddy. But truly, it's ok."

"Ok," he says, kissing my neck now. "So yeah, the genetics thing."

I sigh. "Yeah, it's scary but... we need to check. I think we need to agree what we'll do if the screening finds anything worrying."

"The baby could be really ill, right? Or disabled?"

I feel a cloud of sadness inside me at the thought. "Yes," is all I manage to weakly say.

"I mean I'm not in favour of getting rid of it if it might be disabled. That's a horrifying proposal."

I think back to the many philosophy debates I've been part of discussing this exact thing. For better or for worse, I know my opinion on this. When self-important philosophy students debate anything to do with abortion, the men can explore elaborate devil's advocate arguments with an intellectual sterility that the women can't afford: we all know that one day we may well have to make the decision for ourselves, that fear certainly lurked in the back of my mind.

"I agree. I do think there are conditions that could be so awful for the child, that I don't think I could bring it into the world only to suffer. But only a handful. I would keep the baby in any other circumstance."

He holds me close. "Maybe I'm naive but I think we'll be ok. You said it needed to be in the family already? I don't think we have anything like that."

"I think so too, but I still worry..."

He holds me closer, so tight it's almost uncomfortable, but the reassurance is worth it. "We'll get the test. I can pay for it. I think we agree on how we'll proceed if we find anything worrying."

I've stayed facing away this whole time: the thoughts I've been voicing have felt too raw and painful to look at him while they surfaced. I now feel reassured that we are on the same page, at least. I turn my head back towards him, he raises his, meeting me for a slow and loving kiss. "Thank you, Teddy," I say when we eventually break apart. "You're so kind, I really feel lucky."

We snuggle together for a while longer, enjoying the closeness. It's only when, at one point, I shift my bum slightly that I realise that we're stuck together by a smeary layer of cum. As we peel apart, my thighs tug on his cock and unintentionally draw a lively response from it. Despite the very late hour, the specialness of the moment means I can't resist him. Feeling his stiffness between my legs is intoxicating.

"I guess we're not going to be sleeping for a while yet," I sigh as I turn around to face him, one hand reaching down once I free his cock from between my thighs. "Make love to me again Teddy Bear."