My Brother Returns

The twilight hour had shone through the window, and it seemed time came to a standstill. Everything was perfect, Zach stirred gently in his sleep with his face planted in the pillows and the outline of his defined back stood out in the abstract darkness. I felt a deep pull to put my hand on his arm, to caress him lovingly. His face was peaceful; his dark brows relaxed and for a few moments it appeared like he was made of porcelain. Dark stubble grew which stood in direct contrast to the red plumpness of his upper lip, giving Zachary a refined look of maturity. Suddenly, his dark lashes fluttered, and two piercing eyes looked in my direction.

"Morning," Zach said softly.

"Go back to bed, you still have some time." I replied.

"You can keep your hand there, it felt nice." Zach reassured me.

I moved in closer, enough so that the smell of his fading cologne wafted before my face. With an outstretched arm, I scratched the nape of his neck, trailing down the length of his spine only to keep it rested on the small of his back. A deep yawn and grunt of approval followed but Zach did not return to sleep. He peered at me with intense scrutiny and a funny smirk.

"You promised me Saturday." I stated, reminding him to keep his word.

"Actually, you're gonna hate me, I just remembered that I have this thing I gotta go to, and it's kind of an all day thing. Soooo..." a mischievous grin crept up on his face revealing a crooked smile.

"Oh shut up! I hate you..." I giggled inches away from his face.

"No! Seriously, I actually think I might be sick that day, don't know if I'll be able to hang out." he persisted with his joke.

"You suck!"

"Hahaha, and then after that I have a lot of stuff I have to do, so don't expect to see me for a while."

"Oh yeah? Like what?"

"Not sure, haven't decided on it yet, but I know it's gonna eat up all of my time." he shrugged with the same general air of blasé indifference.

"Cool, so then maybe Lisa should know that you've been out partying. She'll lock you up, and I can have you all to myself." My finger ran along his arm to his chin, along the length of his jaw and rested gently on his cheek.

"You'll always be all mine, little sister." he said inching closer. The warmth of his breath was palpable against my lips.

"You'll always be all mine," he reiterated, suddenly turning to lay his back away from with a hint of laughter in his voice, "but you still can't twist my arm into staying anywhere or doing anything. Remember that!" he laughed confidently.

Quiet disappointment filled the space between us, and I pouted turning away from him. Had he really not wanted to spend time with me? Was all I meant to do was cater and cover for him? The bed was no longer inviting, and a sharp disdain for Zach's jokes brewed in my mind. Perhaps it's best if he leaves to his room, I thought.

"Quit your pouting," he said behind me.

"You don't want to spend time with me."

"Are you serious? I was joking." He said flatly.

"Of course Saturday is ours. Don't ruin the mood by being too serious." he said again.

I remained with my back to him like a petulant child, grinning into the darkness at having made him submit to my displeasure.

"Hold me," I asked softly. There was a pause. Zachary shifted his weight and moved closer to me, but had yet to grasp me with his arm. I turned to meet him, staring back at his rigid face.

"Closer," I said to him. He seemed uncertain, tensed by my request. His eyes traveled down my body to see that I was wearing nothing but his old tee-shirt. The coloring was faded, and the stenciling had all but washed away, but I chose to keep it close when he no longer wanted it. I could sense his reluctance to move closer still, so I outstretched my hand to grab his.

"Do you not understand what closer means? Must I repeat myself?" I chuckled. He relented. My body felt as though it had been made to fit into the grooves of his, and the junction of my shoulder and neck had been made for him to nuzzle perfectly. The space between my fingers had been filled with his, and in my grasp his body relaxed. The rise and fall of his chest matched mine, such that I felt we were one soul. He adjusted himself to his comfort, pulling me closer so that I felt the weight of him rest on my back. He rocked gently until there was nothing but the clothes between us and the heat of his breath on my neck.

"Is this close enough, little sister?" he asked.

"I could think of one way you could be closer." I spoke aloud not entirely sure what possessed me to speak those words. The silence between us was deafening as he tensed again. I did not fear what I had said, that I gave away my heart, but feared that he would collect himself and leave. Fear that my bed would be empty, that not another soul could fill the void that he left, and that I would lie alone without the comfort of my brother. His warm hand trailed to my stomach pulling me tight robbing me of my breath.

"How about now?" his voice grew husky with want.

"Closer," I was breathless, my voice nearing a whisper.

A strong leg pushed my aside until my thigh rested on his for support. He mouth hot against my ear whispered, "How much closer do you want?"

"Maybe closer is no longer the word I'd use to describe what I want..." my heart beat wildly with my audacity.

"Hmm, perhaps not," I could hear the smile forming through his words, "but not tonight, little sister. Tonight we sleep."