The next day Karen felt so confident in Josh's progress that she spent a few hours at the office. She had been able to keep up with her work and her project deadline was approaching. So things on that front were doing fine. But as she was chatting with Meg, her co-worker her hand twitched. She almost spilled her coffee.
"You okay?" the woman asked.
"Yeah," she frowned. "It's just this carpel-tunnel thing. It seems to be coming back with a vengeance."
"Have you been straining yourself lately?"
"I suppose," she said. "What with Josh's hands the way they are I have to - I have to, um, well it's like I have to do everything I ordinarily do, but do it twice."
"Yeah," Meg said. "That'll give you some strain. You have a wrist-wrap?"
"Two."
"That bad?" she said shaking her head. "So listen, I'll set up a voice-mail box special. You can call in and dictate. Sandy will transcribe. With all you have to do these days it's the least we can do to help you."
"That is so nice!"
Josh thought so too. But as she walked about the house with both wrists wrapped he had to wonder. The wraps didn't just clutch her wrists, but wrapped around her thumb and palm with a metal plate that ran from her arm to just below her fingers. But he didn't say anything. They showered that night and she took them off to clean him. But that's all that she did. It was okay, he figured. He could hold out a while.
But that while began to get long. And they both knew it. He was getting grumpy and she was getting frustrated. She knew that his need would rise soon, but as willing as her spirit was she wondered about her weak flesh.
It was Saturday night and he had finally worked up the courage to invite Jamie over. Karen insisted that she come for dinner. Josh was at first mortified at the thought. She'd see him being fed like a baby.
"Well she saw that when she visited you in the hospital," Karen said. "In fact she even helped you and you two were all giggles about that."
"But that was in the hospital," he protested. "I was wearing that stupid hospital gown and there were all those hospital monitors and things, and it was okay because it was a hospital."
"Your logic would confound Plato himself."
"Don't you see?" he said almost whining. "That was different. It's different here. Here I'm home and I'm dressed regular and it's just different."
"I know what to do," Karen said.
At first Josh thought that she was crazy. She had rented a movie, sent out for pizza and set up the living room. And at first Karen thought that she was indeed crazy. Jamie showed up all bubbly and concerned and that was just fine. But she was dressed in a pair of Daisy-Duke cut-offs and a very tight ribbed tank-top. The girl was a stunner, and she saw the look in Josh's eyes. She also saw a look in Jamie's eyes and so she dared to hope.
Her plan worked out. Jamie and Josh were back to giggling and joking as she sat next to him, all curled up and feeding him. Josh looked happy and relaxed. The kids asked what movie she had rented.
"It's an old film, but quite charming. It's called Edward Scissorhands. Ever hear of it?"
They both shook their heads. They looked at the cover and then looked at each other. But when they saw it was one of Johnny Deep's early works they got a little excited. Then they were captivated. And when the romantic scene between Edward and Kim came on Karen's phone rang. It was Meg, and right on time.
Karen left the room to take the call. In the kitchen she and Meg had a good laugh over their successful little plot to leave the kids alone. The two chatted on the phone until Jamie had to leave. Josh and Jamie asked if she could come back the next day and the two could hang out by the pool. Karen was more than happy. After the girl left and Karen was cleaning up the pizza, she asked,
"So what did you think of the movie?"
"Kinda weird," he said as if in a daze. "But kinda cool too."
High praise, she thought.
But as she was finishing up she saw that he was curled up on the couch. Then she saw his erection. Then she saw the look in his eyes. She smiled, got the towel and lotion. She dimmed the lights, got on her knees, and hoped.
Then she cursed herself for trying. He was as hard as he had ever been, but she was not able to perform. The moment she had taken off her wrist wraps she felt the twangs of pain. And as she tried to caress and stroke him, her hands cramped and the pangs were causing her to jerk and twitch, then she snagged his flesh with a fingernail. He yelped.
"Oh I'm sorry," she cried.
"It's okay," he said. "It was nothing. Really. It's okay."
"Oh Josh, I am so sorry."
"I know," he said.
He was beginning to fade. She slumped. Then he sat up, leaned in and with his bandaged hand he lifted her chin.
"Look mom," he said. "It's really okay. You've done so much to help me. It's okay. Kind of crazy when you think about it. I mean here I am not able to - you know, because of my hands. And now it's your hands. Kind of weird, isn't it?"
They both chuckled.
"Makes you wonder," he said. "What Edward did."
"Probably why he was so pale."
They both laughed.
"Poor guy," she said. "But at least we know that you'll get your hands back soon. Still, I wish there was something that I could do. I feel so . . . helpless."
"Well," he said with a sort of innocent shrug. "You know, I've heard, I mean sometimes, like sometimes I've heard of people using, um, like using their . . . mouths."
She wasn't startled. She wasn't shocked. She knew that he was just thinking logically. And logically it made sense. Sort of. But there was something about the thought that made her think more than twice. She looked at him, and she truly felt sad.
"I . . . "she said hesitating. "I don't think that I could do that. I don't know. It just seems like it's crossing some line. I just don't . . ."
"It's okay! Look, it was just a thought, but I see what you mean. So anyway, it was a great night. Thanks. Really. So let's go to bed now. Okay?"
She lay awake, unable to stop thinking. The night had gone so well. She had managed to turn his humiliation into something exciting and playful. Jamie got into it. She had chosen the right movie and she had engineered her absence perfectly. But when it came time to put the climax on things she had failed. She knew that it wasn't her fault. If only there was something else she could have done for him. She thought about his suggestion, but that was just out. She finally fell asleep, still wondering.
In the morning shower he was as hard as iron. She tried to ignore it and he let her. She knew that he had his need, but he didn't ask. Still, she knew that she needed to do something, and she was determined to figure it out.
When Jamie arrived she told the kids that she needed to get some important work done. She and Jamie made lunch and Jamie said that she would take care of things while Karen shut herself up in her study. They promised to not disturb her. And there was no reason why they would. They took Josh's laptop and phone out by the pool and Jamie became Josh's fingers. And whatever it was that so captivated the two kept them there all afternoon.
In her study Karen shut the door. She thought it ironic how that with her wrist-wraps she could do pretty much anything - except what she needed to do. She got on her computer and - and she didn't know what to look for. Where should she start? She knew that the answer was out there somewhere, if she knew the right question. She tried the obvious.
'My son needs sexual relief'
What she got was a lot of article regarding adolescents with autism. Not her case.