Last summer I attended a family wedding with my mother and stepfather. Just before he took a mother and daughter photo my stepfather said to his wife: When we get back home YOU will be taking a trip over my knee whilst I pull your knickers down, bare that big fat arse of yours and tan it so hard that you won't be able to sit down for a week.
That is why in the photo my mother could barely manage a half-hearted smile because she was already worrying about being put over her husband's knee again and yet again being given a good hiding on her bare behind.
And that is why I am smiling broadly because I know that later in the day I will see my mummy's bottom and see it get a sound spanking!
Because we were having the photo taken my mother and I were standing very close to each other facing the camera. It was easy therefore for me to reach behind her, gently pat both her plump soft bottom cheeks and murmur some words of commiseration. I should tell you that my mother wears UK size 14 knickers which struggle to contain her 40+ inch bottom. Even so size 14 isn't big at all for a woman of mummy's age. Anyway, nothing wrong with a bigger wobbly bottom, more to spank! My stepfather is being a little mean to call it a big fat arse.
Sure enough, not very long after our return home, my stepfather kept his promise to his wife. Even before we had time to change out of our wedding attire she was upended over his knee, a position she was now becoming far too familiar with. Not just over his knee but jacknifed right over so that her high-heeled shoes were on the floor at one side and her hands on the floor at the other side, her nose almost touching the carpet.