Mostly Myself

I awake with a suddenly to the feeling of .my stomach tightening. Mandy has me in her mouth and her well-manicured nail strokes the area behind my balls back to my ass. Barely, conscious it is too late for me to slow it down. With several quick jerks of my hips I unload. Mandy uses her tongue to do little circles on the underside of my head and slides her finger into me mid-spasm squeezing the last thick jets of cum out of me, as she swallows greedily.

"Woman, some warning. You could cause a man to have a heart attack." I look out the window. "The sun is barely up."

"Complaints?"

"Only, that I was asleep and did not get to enjoy it more. It will take me a few minutes to recover so that you can be thanked properly."

Mandy cups my balls and squeezes just enough to make sure I start to firm up. "I would love that but we can't. Just had a shower and you need to drop me off near my apartment, I am supposed to ..." Her hand gestures as if it is trying to pull some information from me.

"Saturday. Tomorrow is Peter's christening." I rub my temples. "They are all going to be there," I say.

"Yes, yes in a few hours. The whole damn lot of them. Every friend and family member from every and anywhere. That means I have to make the townhouse I have been not living in for the last month looked lived in. And you need to make sure I don't leave anything here out in the open. Bob and Arn are staying with you. Mom with me -- the standard out-of-town family shuffle -- except neither of us are married anymore. So, we have that line of inquiry to look forward to. That is the last you are going to get for a bit." She smiles, "But after yesterday I thought you should have a little something," she pulls herself up me, "for all your hard work." She kisses me forcing -- not that I am resisting -- her tongue into my mouth. "To tide me over." She pecks my cheek.

"Don't you mean me?" I say point to myself.

She looks at me and licks her sticky fingers. "No, I said what I meant." As Mandy starts for the bathroom, she looks back at me. "We have to move. If we get caught...I don't want to even think."

"Me neither." I am up pulling jeans and a shirt on. "Wait, do you have your overnight bag, toothbrush and all that area?"

"Yes."

"Your drawers are clearer out?" Mandy and I had been pretty much cohabiting for a couple of months at my place. I moved to the next town over to allow us some anonymity and she had her own areas at my place. It was all part of a very complex strategy. She sleeps over here. I show up to her place for family get togethers, if that is necessary. Sex here -- any stolen moment, my favorite part. Sex there -- never. A couple here. Cousins there. No pictures together without a least one other person in the frame or if it is taken by a family friend or member. Thank god for cell phones, at least we could get a call from wherever we are and make our excuses and escapes as necessary.

"Cell phone?" I say.

"Damn it." She grabs it off the bedside table. "Got it." She stops and kisses me again -- maybe, that is my favorite part. "Come on let's go."

After dropping Mandy off. I come home, take a shower, hose down the shower, change sheets and throw everything in the wash. Then, I start the clothes and dishwasher. A last sweep to make sure no women's clothing or make-up is lying around. I have to admit I am beginning feel like a cleaner for the mob but that is the price for Mandy.

There is a knock at the door. I open it and two near carbon copies of me stare back one slightly older, one slightly younger. I cannot prove it but if someone said my family was part of a "Boys from Brazil" like project I would be hard put to argue otherwise. These cousins are no different.

"Ryan" The oldest says.

"Arn. Bob." We stare at each other in the door way. "Sorry boys, tight quarters but you guys can share the bed. I will bunk on the couch."

Arn, the older, raises a sleeping roll, "Yeah. No. I have slept with this little SOB before and he continuously pissed the bed. I can rack on the floor"

"We were 3 and 5. And she is your mother too." Bob leaned in and half whispered. "Now I only piss the bed if I am black out drunk."

I raise my hands in the classic hold on a moment gesture. "Sleep where ever. Either of you piss on my bed or floor and I best not know it or I will beat the shit out of both of you. Where are my manners, come on in."

We laugh. The shit talking has begun as part of the ever continuing Connor battle for one-up-man-ship. "Bourbon is in the cabinet by the sink."

"Little early ain't it. Hell, I ain't particular but still have to attend an AA meeting today." Bob says.

"Yeah but think what doing and who we will be doing it with for the next two days." Boy that has taken on a different meaning lately. I think I might have blushed some. "You can always get a new chip but you are not getting this day back."

"We may need a second bottle." Arn offers.

"Got one."

"Good man." He slaps me on the back and pushes by me. Arn and I more than cousins or clone, we are practically the same person. That is also more worrisome than normal.

"Hey, sorry about the divorce. Bob's taught me all I needed to know about that to keep me from getting married."

"You are too much an asshole for a woman to stand you long enough to marry you."

"And I have too much dick to stay with only one."

Arn did have a reputation as a bit of a ladies man. Thinking back to the clone issue I find myself wonder how far similarities -- shall we say extend. Now, there is an image I did not need.

"Shut up, Arn. So, what happened?" Bob was the youngest and most emphatic of us. Man his wife screwed him over good and several other men -- literally. So, he was a bit more sensitive to matters of the heart than either Arn or I.

"Too much an asshole." I start laughing into my drink.

"Fucker." Bob took a swig of beer. Yeah, Angie, his ex-wife, had worked a number on him.

"Drink up boys. But we have to be able to make the functions. You know the rules."

"Speaking of divorce -- how is Mandy?" Arn asked.

"Okay, I've seen her one or twice. Seems her situation was a bit more friendly than mine and certain more than Bob's. Sorry."

"Andrew was always a good guy." Bob pointed out.

Arn smiled, "But I always felt he ran a bit cold for her."

I shrugged. All the time thinking, we are the same damn person.

"You remember the half pie eyed crushes we had on her?" Arn laughed and sipping his beer, "She still is an attractive girl."

"Alright, Arn, easy big fellow."

"Hell, like you wouldn't? You know what they say, "Closer kin, deeper in."

I spray my drink out. Too close. "Damn, now I am wasting bourbon." I grab a towel pretend to clean up and let the question die.

We spend the about next hour downing a bourbon and beer and shooting the bull before heading to the cook out. We had been the three musketeers once and we were again. The boys all single.

By one in the afternoon, we are setting up for the event on what turns out to be a warm fall day. I tried to strategically ignore Mandy and hang with my new housemates. Every so often, I could swear Arn was watching me. The next few hours are a combination of bliss and agony as I roamed from family member to family member making the required small talk. Bliss being that you have a juicy secret no one knows. Expect maybe, Arn, is he watching me again? Agony, basically the same thing. The combination, well I can not be sure but by the end of the party I was convinced that Mandy had started to rub her ass against me at any given opportunity. Leaving the challenge of several hard-ons unanswered for the first time in months. About, eight the reunion started to break down -- Mandy and I found ourselves racking folding chairs.

"What is up with Arn?" Mandy whispered.

"Either, it seems he is gunning for you or he know about us?" I say, not moving my lips looking straight ahead.

"Well, you too are a lot alike. Rumor has it he is packing. Might be fun, maybe?"

I look directly at her. "Don't even start woman." I walk away with a stack of chairs. She follows.

"Damn. I don't think I have ever seen your soft underbelly. You know I am joking, right?"

"Seriously, we are discussing this? Here?" I stop fearing I may be a bit loud.

"Come on. This is ridiculous."

"Sorry, you're right. It has been an odd day and I have to still make it through the night with those two. I just need to back it down. I am telling you Arn is like a hound on a scent."

"You're serious. You think he smells pussy on you."

"Maybe. I am not ...look after the last few months... I am not looking to blow this up in front of everyone because of his Spidey sense. No offense. So, we need to shut this conversation down now."

"Well, I see." She turns and walks off. I look around for Arn. He is back on the porch busy helping pack up a table. "Well, I may have fucked that up." and I continue on with the chairs.

Thankfully, the rest of the night is a non-event, we play some dollar ante poker and drink way too much bourbon.

The next morning about five minutes before schedule I pull into the Union Methodist parking lot. Bob and Arn had packed up and rolled out ahead of me as I was feeling a bit more poorly than them, they have been single longer. Not that I was unattached now but after last night you never know. Of course, they took the chance to get one last shot in by making sure that the water heater was drained. So, a cold, slightly hung over shower it was.

Mandy stands out front with her mother -- Carol, Aunt Carol to me. I have no idea how the title got in there considering we were cousins but Dad was an only child -- he and I were the only two in the family. For the last couple years, I have been the only child. So, in the extended family I have many "Aunts" and "Uncles" who are not exactly such. Everyone else appears to be inside.

"Come on slow poke" Carol calls out. "Mandy said we'd have to call you to get you here on time."

"Well you know me." I smile at Carol. "Ladies." Carol starts toward the church at a trot.

"What in the hell?" Mandy says.

"I always arrive at the last moment. Plus the boys and I did do some drinking last night. Don't ask."

She sticks her tongue out at me.

"Promises."

"Not until most everyone is out of town." As we start toward the church, I find my hand on her back. Things seem okay, maybe last night can fade away. "Sir, please remove your hand. Seriously, everyone we know is here, even if they did not make the party."

"Awesome."

"I did not tell you to tie one on last night."

"Well, I was busy appearing normal."

"By the way you look nice."

I smile and straighten up a bit.

"I think you and Arn are wearing the same suit."

"Bitch."

"Don't I know it. Come by to say goodbye to Mom and hang around until everyone else takes off."

"Can do. The boys are packed and heading back to the hills after church."

"Well, is that convenient." She imitated the Church Lady complete with smirk, the one Dana Carvey used to do on SNL.

"I had no idea you liked comedy that much. Don't do that again."

As we enter the church I slide into a back pew while Mandy and Carol continue to some seats saved in the front. There is apparently some limits to decency -- at least in public -- for Mandy and I. I cannot say much for the sermon except this never was an organ as loud or a choir so full of tenors as in that little cracker-box of a church. About the time my nose was about to bleed the preacher signaled "all rise" and started the benediction. "Amen."

It is a couple hours later that I find myself with Mandy standing on the patch of grass, that passes for a yard in front of most townhouses, saying our goodbyes to Carol and some of the rest of the family. When did this town get "communities"? I had not even thought about that before. Almost completely rehydrated, I feel much more like myself, as we wave goodbye.

"Would you help me with something?" Mandy says.

"Sure."

As the door shut, Mandy hikes her skirt revealing her bare ass and bends over the table. I step up beside her, "Not allowed, not here."

"Fuck the rules and me while you're at it."

I start to caress her sex. She is already wet. She purrs.

"You have no control, little girl. And I did not appreciate your comments last night. You're just a little slut off her chain that needs to be taught a lesson." I slide two fingers in her. She starts to thrust back but I pull them out of her. "You need to learn to mind."

"Are you crazy.You think I will just let you..." she's defiant but still splayed over the table. So, I thrust three fingers in her. "...yes." She hisses. Again, I pull them out before she can truly enjoy the sensation. I turn her head to me and present my hand without a word all three fingers are taken into her mouth. Damn, what a talent.

"I told you I was going to use you as I saw fit that first day, if you did not stop me." I slide my fingers out of her mouth and rest my hand on her waist. I feel her tremble.

Mandy swallows. "Yes, sir you did." She places her head on the table. "Ready."

I am as hard as a man can be. That hard-on where your dick is actually a little shorter because the muscles are so tense. I step over to the counter and open the drawer where I would have dish towels. Excellent, there they are. Taking one I twist it around in my hand. "Open your mouth."As she does I place the towel in her mouth. I unbuckled my belt, "Ten." I slide the belt between her legs and let it come to rest on her ass. "If you lose the towel -- the count starts again."

She nods and faces forward. With the first crack of the belt she drops the towel with a yelp.

"I said hold it in your mouth, not spit it out." Quickly, Mandy puts the rag in her mouth again. As the belt slaps against her ass and pussy I start to count the strokes aloud. By four she is weeping. With the seventh she is grunting out the count as she opens to meet the stroke. By the ninth I can tell she is about to lose herself, as am I. This woman who so dominated my fantasy life now submitting to me it was intoxicating. I change angle for the last stroke as the tongue of the belt laps her twat her legs dance but she does not move. I look at her lovely pale skin striped up. Her wetness sounds like rain drops falling from a roof against the floor.

"Do not let it go. Do not move." I remove my shoes and drop my pants. Letting her wait. Letting me calm down. That and the fact I am still dressed for church and only know one dry cleaner in the area and I have known him since middle school and I don't need that discussion in town. I can still feel the heat from the whipping radiating off of her lips, as I drive into her. She screams through the towel but does not drop it, as I start to work on her. All the while massaging her fresh bruises. Within minutes, she is squealing. By the feel of her I know where she is exactly.

"Stay." I step back and pull on my pants and slide into my loafers tucking my socks in my pocket. "Not here. You know where I will be."

When I get home I change into a tee and jeans. Then, I sit down and watch the door hoping I know what will happen next. There is a knock. Strange, Mandy has a key. I open the door in the hallway Mandy stands completely nude with her dress lying on the floor.

"Jesus." I jerk her inside, grabbing her dress up while looking up and down the small hall. I shut the door. "Are you nuts?"

"Yes. Well, maybe." She pulls close and rests her head on me. "I don't know what happened at my place but I want that."

"You want to be submissive?"

"Sometimes, maybe. But no, I need that level of intimacy and intensity. These last few months have been wonderful but that was something else. If that means my submission -- you have it." She trails off, "But I want nothing between us. I do not think you can call it submission because I want everything. I want to demand it of you. I want you to demand it of me. We have been half in because of everyone else."

"There are reasons."

"To hell with them and everyone else."

To hear a woman you have wanted all your life say that especially when you knew you'd never have her... stops you in your tracks. I felt numb like I was too near a lightening strike. We are in bed before I feel mostly myself again. She claws desperately at me as she cums in waves. And I cling to her no less desperate, as I try to follow her lead.

We continued deep into the night. As the first glint of sunlight breaks the horizon, I am still electric and awake. She has been asleep for a few hours. I run my hands over her breasts and down her body.

""The sun is barely up. We have to get ready for work soon."

"More than that," I say, as I enter her from behind. "We need to find new jobs outside this area."

"Seriously?"

"I think so."