Early morning, Mom's perspective...
I woke early from what seemed like a wet dream as I lay on my side. I've never felt so satisfied yet still so insatiable in all of my life. It reminded me of the early days having sex with John's father and that was a long time ago.
From the loose spoon position we were in I could feel John's arm across my waist and the warmth of his body against mine. As I was also on my side facing away from him, Beth was facing me. My arm had slid under her neck when her head hit the pillow as we fell asleep and now she had slid farther into my cuddle where her head rested near the crook of my shoulder with her forehead against my collar bone. Her arms were pulled in tight between us as she lay in a fetal position up against me. I could feel the warmth of her body and the scent of her hair.
As I lay there, so many things flashed through my mind from 'Oh my! What have I done! I'm John's mother for crying out loud... And Beth too on top of it all!' to 'Oh my god, I must be a horrible person and mom!... But, on the other hand I never would have believed how good this could feel.'
In the predawn light I could see the top of Beth's head and she could feel the ever so slight breath against my upper chest and breast. Being with John had definitely hit a naughty button with me, which was amplified from my own fantasies for the last few years, but Beth was an unexpected surprise in a big way.
Yes, I had fantasized about being with her sexually, but getting to know her more and sensing the aspects of her personality from the loss of her mom also pushed a protective motherly button within me too. I had to admit it felt strange.
On one hand the sexual attraction of such a younger female sexual partner and the taboo naughtiness that alone vs. the feeling of her being almost an offspring was quite an exciting combination. All I knew is I wanted to protect her and make her happy just as much as I do John and I felt just as guilty about her as I did the true incestuous situation with John, but I felt helpless in my desire to be intimate with her.
I kissed the top of her head and must have registered in her sleeping mind because she reacted in moving deeper into the cuddle. The hand of my arm she was on moved up and my fingers lightly caressed her back and gave her a very light protective hug for a moment before I faded back to sleep.
The next thing I knew was I felt her move and heard the soft beep of her phone. Apparently she had set an alarm but lowered the volume setting as to not wake us. She slowly moved to the edge of the bed and silenced it.
"Everything ok?" I asked softly.
Beth turned to me and smiled. "Sorry if I woke you! Yes, everything is fine... I promised to meet my dad at the diner this morning for breakfast to tell him about the move."
"Worried about his reaction?"
"No, not really" she said softly as she looked at me with an equally soft smile.
"Do you plan on taking a shower? Have the time?"
"Yes, I think I need one after last night" she said with a hint of a giggle.
"Use mine then... everything you'll need is in there. Mind if I join you? I promise not to hold you up too much" I said with my own soft giggle.
"I'd like that!" said Beth in a whisper and a grin.
I moved out from beneath John's arm that was draped over my waist and slid out of bed. It didn't seem to bother him a bit, and he looked like he was still fully out of it.
We both pinned our hair up and jumped in the shower. At one point Beth just turned and gave me a very sensuous kiss which was gratefully returned and resulted in some very sensuous lathering and rinsing as we took turns in front of the shower head. All in all it was very erotic, but not so engaging to lose track of time. This was one meeting she didn't want to be late for.
After brushing out her hair and applying a slight bit of makeup, she said bye and that she would be back in a few hours. I looked at her and laughed saying "But you're naked!"
She giggled and kissed my cheek. "Remember the clothes from last night? They're downstairs."
I laughed quietly and said "I know, only kiddng... Good luck Honey, see you soon..."
As she left, I went to the bath to continue brushing my own hair and used a tie to secure it into a pony tail. As I did, my mind wandered to my friend Marie who once upon a time enjoyed her long hair but chose to have it styled short. I remembered how she really liked the low maintenance and it made her look years younger and I toyed with the idea of doing the same.
After putting on a touch of makeup, I headed to the closet and grabbed my short robe. As I did, I heard John give off a soft "emmmm" and I turned and caught him as he rolled from his side to his back. I was surprised to see he had what his dad calls "morning wood" seeing his 8 inch cock was hard and pointing up at his head at a 45 degree angle and forming a nice considerable tent under the sheet.
I admired the fit young stud that just happened to be my son laying there. I felt the warmth and wetness start below and the fingers of my right hand slid beneath my robe and pressed into my vulva, but finally chose to stop staring otherwise I knew I'd end up masturbating intensely or worse, waking him up an fucking him feverishly until I achieved enough orgasms to exhaust me. I remembered my resolve for our new situation to remain as close to normal as possible so we could take it slow, so I headed downstairs.
I made coffee and crossed my arms under my breasts as I leaned against the counter and waited for it to brew as I thought again about getting my hair styled. I knew I had a lot of thinking to do but it was a nice diversion to keep my mind occupied until I could settle down with my coffee. Finally a few moments later I had a full mug and took it out to the deck to drink it and think.
I sat in a chair at the picnic table and felt the morning sun hitting me. It was a bit chilly, but the rays of the sun felt good and warm while the chill felt invigorating as the birds in the area sang their morning song.
I closed my eyes and aimed my face into the rising sun, feeling the warmth of the rays as I remembered yesterday, last night and the thoughts I had this morning as I woke with John and Beth sleeping next to me. The thought that it was actually straight-out incest stirred guilt in the back of my mind, though it filled my loins with desire, even as sat here at that moment, feeling very confused... and I knew I had to think this out.
I watched a bluebird dart from one tree to another as the concept of guilt seemed to bounce in my mind.
Am I guilty of incest? Yes.
Do I feel guilty about the incest?
I suddenly paused to think about that. In a way, yes I felt guilty about breaking "the rules" between a parent and their offspring... but in this case John's an adult and so is Beth and if I'm guilty something, it would be for having the best sex in my life with the two people in this world I love the most.
How does that fit into the equation?
After some heavy contemplation, I could see the "breaking the rules" guilt came from society's rules that are programmed into our thinking. Our situation was based on intimate sexual desires and pleasing the ones we love with no intent or outside the risk of inbreeding.
This eased the "programming" guilt which I I definitely feltt, but as I compared it to our situation it seemed to fade... no, not fade, morph was a better word, because the guilt honed the taboo edge to the situation. It seemed to be the match that lit the fire creating the special excitement of it all. It seemed like the proverbial hand in the cookie jar effect. It didn't go away; it just became accepted in a sense and more of an asset than a negative.
I realized this all sounds like classic justification, but it did feel so right, partly because of both John and Beth's reaction to it all.
Their reactions won out with me and I took the fact that they too had already had incestuous fantasies about me and in the case of John for years and I added that into the equation. They seemed to have accepted the incest context for what it was with full understanding and, like me enjoying the taboo sensation of it all.
As my thoughts continued, I thought though some of the things we had said, the things we'd done yesterday and last night, even though some of them being borderline kinky, never once did I feel either one of them taking advantage of it as gratuitous, self-serving sex. Instead, the opposite happened.
What made the situation so endearing was the how our little taboo world formed so naturally and how the thought of pleasing each other seemed so instinctual, so lovingly but also so naughty as we shared our secret excitement and opened a door to share our most secret personas.
Oh, it felt so naughty and felt soooo exciting but in a strange way it felt so natural!
I was so glad I finally had crossed with line with both of them, especially John where I had fantasized so long about him. After actually having him, it felt like someone opened the flood gates. I wanted more... I wanted to open up my suppressed desires and explore so much more with him fucking me in so many lewd situations or me sucking his cock to satisfy my impulse to milk his cum from him and please both of us at the same time. I wanted to fulfill his fantasies and allow him to provide me with my needs and desires.
Actually, the same desires were for Beth too. Oh the things, both loving and erotic to playful and naughty that I see in her eyes and sense in her being intrigue me so.
I felt my nipples become hard and tingle and my warmth grow below as I thought how we seemed to be so matched in the need to be loved as a mother and daughter while at the same time being able to express it as a loving and playful sexual partner. I was also finding out she too has her suppressed desires and hoped to be one of her companions to explore them.
