Losing Control at the Lae

As easy as it had been to convince my mom that Jayme and I weren't hiding a secret, it was getting harder and harder to find opportunities to sneak around. Derek was home almost all the time, and my mom and dad were keeping a close eye on me -- and Jayme -- since the incident.

So the three of us -- Jayme, Derek, and me -- spent a lot of time together at the lake, which was torture, because all I could think about when I saw Jayme in swim trunks was sex, and I knew he felt the same way. It was all we could do to keep our hands off one another around Derek. In fact, on more than one occasion, we were less than discreet and I swore he saw -- although if he did, he certainly didn't let on.

I also continued to date Josh, which was difficult because I was so incredibly attracted to him. Of course I had a hard time refusing his advances. He was patient with me, and after the day he'd made me cum in his bedroom I made up an excuse about needing to slow it down again, which he agreed to. But I wasn't kidding myself. He was a guy after all. I knew he was likely sleeping with other girls, but he made it clear time and time again that he wanted me, and I had so little willpower that I knew it was just a matter of time. I didn't know how long I could continue to look Jayme in the eye and not betray myself to him. And I was scared that Jayme would get so jealous that it would change his relationship with Josh or put us somehow in the spotlight with his comments and behavior. That was the last thing I wanted.

It was also difficult to watch Jayme mauled by every woman at Josh's parties, too, including Mrs. Hickman, who was clearly up for another round of whatever good time Jayme had showed her the first time. She watched him like prey every time he stepped foot on her property. And Alicia continued to flirt with Jayme in her cool way, which made me incredibly jealous, because she was so beautiful and so unlike me.

Josh's parties were tough for Jayme, too, to be fair. He had murder in his eyes every time Josh touched me in front of him, and he was always moody on the way over there. Afterwards, he couldn't get enough of me. On several occasions we left abruptly and, without giving any thought to being discovered, fucked against the side of the boathouse. There were so many people who could have seen us, but usually by the time Jayme grabbed my wrist and pushed me against the siding I was done for. The entire state could have come along and I would have happily done unspeakable acts in front of all of them. I was just that out of control.

It was at one of Josh's parties when Josh whispered, "Let's go be alone for a bit" and led me inside. We first tried the media room, but there were already couples in it, and then we went to his room, but there were two very drunk girls there making out on his bed in wet bathing suits, so it wouldn't have even helped to kick them out. Finally, we slipped into a spare bedroom and locked the door.

The bedroom was beautifully decorated, with a private bathroom attached to it. In the middle of the excessively large bathroom was a Jacuzzi tub on a pedestal overlooking the back yard. Josh chuckled softly to himself as I took it all in. "I forgot about that tub," he murmured. "How did I forget about that awesome tub? I should've brought you in here long ago."

He pulled me close and breathed against my ear, "Want to get in with me?" I pulled back to see if he was serious, and he was grinning, but he was absolutely not kidding. It was happening. His hard cock was pressed against my ass, we were both wearing very little, and there was no way that I was leaving that room without having sex with Josh. And I wasn't the least bit disappointed about that.

"Tell you what," he said in response to what he thought was my reluctance, "You can keep your suit on if you like. But I'm taking everything off." And he stripped his shirt and shorts off and strutted into the bathroom, completely naked.

Now, Jayme's body was great. He was on the thin side, and I've always preferred guys with a slighter build. I loved every inch of him, and I never imagined I could want anyone as much as I wanted Jayme. But when I saw Josh Hickman naked in the lights of that marble bathroom I felt a cramp of desire flash through me. I stared at him like he was the first naked man I'd ever seen, which in a sense, he was. I took in every inch of him, unfamiliar and dangerous and entirely desirable. I guess it showed on my face, because Josh smiled then, not a sweet smile but the kind of smile Jayme got just when he was about to ask me to do something dirty. He turned on the water and then stood by the tub, lazily rubbing his chest, while I marveled at his lean, tattooed body. And finally, when I could no longer pretend I wasn't going to look at it, I took in the beautiful sight of Josh Hickman's giant cock.

He hadn't been hard when he'd first shed his clothes, but watching me and running the water seemed to have done the trick, because he was stiffening as he stared at me and casually squeezed his cock. And I stopped in my tracks and just stared. It was that intimidating. It was long and thick and beautifully made, a perfect cock, and as I looked at it, it seemed to keep growing. Josh was stroking himself slowly now, almost hypnotizing me with the steady motion of his large fingers wrapped around his shaft.

"Um," I started nervously.

He reached out his hand. "Coming in?" he asked, as the tub filled with water. I nodded and he drew me to him, sliding his hands inside my tank top and peeling it effortlessly from my body. Before I knew it he was kissing me and unfastening my shorts all at the same time, so that I stood in front of him in just my bathing suit. But, just as he suggested, he didn't try to remove my suit. He helped me into the tub and then got in with me, facing me, my legs on either side of his body, my feet braced on the tub wall next to him. He scooted me closer and brushed his lips over mine lightly several times before drawing me in for a more passionate kiss.

"This is exactly where I want to be," he said tenderly. "I'm sick of all those people." He brushed wisps of hair back from my forehead and ran his finger along my jaw and down my throat. I was barely breathing. "I was really hoping we could be alone tonight," he murmured. "So we can, you know, take it to the next level."

I was ready to take it to any level Josh wanted, and would have gladly just initiated it myself if I hadn't been still working my "almost a virgin" angle. Irrationally, I tried to convince myself that it was really true, since incestuous sex with your uncle couldn't possibly count. But Jayme and I had done too much, and it was hard not to respond the way I wanted to. Besides, it was clearly turning Josh on -- maybe more -- to think I was such an innocent girl. And I wanted to take advantage of that for just a bit longer.

So I just nodded and looked at him and he kissed me again and then carefully untied the top of my bathing suit, tossing it into the corner as he ran his fingers down my chest, dipped them into the water, and then dripped the water on my nipples. I sighed and closed my eyes as he continued to dip his fingers in the bath and drip the water on my breasts. My nipples puckered from the sensation of the water, and paired with the air conditioning and my desire for Josh they were aching pebbles. Josh dipped his head to lick the water off, sucking one nipple for what seemed like forever, then licking the other, teasing it with the tip of his tongue, making me shiver in the warm water as his tongue traced around and around my nipple, the tiny bumps on my areola, the smooth flesh of my bare tit.

Eventually he paused to kiss me, and as he did, he pulled me so my chest was against his, my nipples rubbing against his firm torso, his arms wrapped firmly around me, and his hips positioned so that I was seated astride his very firm, very large cock, separated from my body only by my bikini bottom. I moaned against his mouth before I realized I had done it, and he didn't need much encouragement. He slid the bottoms aside before I could protest and slipped inside of me.

Josh's cock was so much larger than Jayme's that I could feel the difference. While Jayme was a perfect fit, Josh almost stretched me, and I couldn't feel as much as I wanted to because we were underwater. "Can we go to the bed?" I whispered.

I think Josh took that for the kind of thing a romantic-minded teenage girl might say, because he was immediately all concerned. "I'm sorry, Dana, of course we can. You're right. Our first time should be in a bed."

Little did he know that it wasn't the romantic notion of the bed that I wanted, it was the full sensation of his cock sliding in and out of me.

After some awkward untangling, we got out of the tub and over to the bed, where Josh rubbed me dry with a fluffy towel and removed my bikini bottoms. And then he kissed me again and made motions to get all sweet and gentle, but I'd had enough. I pulled him down on top of me, not gently, and wrapped my legs around his hips, rocking against his cock, so there would be no mistaking what it was that I wanted. He paused only long enough to reach his hand between us and guide his swollen cock into my waiting pussy, and then he was inside me again, touching every place within me.

He took his sweet time fucking me, changing rhythm every now and then, varying his strokes so that some were deeper and some were shallower, sometimes he was grinding all the way inside me while other times he was merely sinking a few inches in and out. And I stopped thinking. All of our makeout sessions and all of my stolen moments with Jayme, my sexual frustration and my insatiable appetite, all combined for the perfect storm. I was in heaven being fucked by him, and I couldn't get him close enough. I was grabbing his arms and clawing at his back, digging my fingers into his tight ass as he pounded me, and I could feel the orgasm building in me, picking up speed, barreling toward me like a train.

When it hit me I cried out Josh's name over and over, and he pressed his lips against my ear and murmured, "That's it, cum for me, good girl." It barely felt like it was over when he shifted and hit some other place inside me and it flared all over again, a second surge of orgasm as powerful as the first. I was trembling and panting and my thighs wouldn't stop twitching and Josh never stopped, just continued fucking me, my pussy impossibly wet and still contracting around his massive cock, crooning in my ear, "God, I love to watch you cum, I love to feel you cum on my cock...I love to hear you lose control...that's it, forget everything, just cum for me, just like that." As my second orgasm ebbed I wondered how many times this could happen, how many times I could cum with him inside me. And at some point my brain just stopped altogether and all I was conscious of was Josh murmuring to me, "Oh, Dana, I love fucking you. Your pussy is so tight and wet...it's so perfect...I want to shoot my cum inside this perfect pussy...I want to make you cum again on my cock...oh, Jesus, you feel so incredible..."

I could tell Josh was getting close when he stopped whispering to me and his breathing changed. And I was down enough from my high to be aware of his orgasm building and my amazement that it was happening, that I could make Josh Hickman cum, that Josh Hickman was going to lose control and cum inside me. And I couldn't say more, but I whispered his name in his ear and licked his salty neck and nipped at his collarbone and he shivered and groaned and squeezed my hips with his fingers as he shot his enormous load inside of me. I could feel the surging as I clenched him tightly from within. And then he shuddered and lay still, buried inside me, covered in goosebumps. I giggled in delight, skimming my hands down his arms.

"Goosebumps?" I whispered, delighted.

"Mmhmm," he murmured, kissing me all over my face, first tenderly, then planting huge silly smacks all over my face while I continued to giggle. We were still fused together, his cock shrinking and our fluids leaking out of me, and he rolled off me and pulled me to him so that we were spooning, my ass tucked against his groin and my back pressed against the lean, sweaty length of him.

"Let's just stay here," he said softly. "Just like this."

"Mmm," I whispered, wide awake from my sex high, realizing that Josh was on his way to falling asleep wrapped around me. I tried to relax enough to nap with him, but I was too amped, my body like a live wire still, and my mind racing with a million different pieces of information. I was definitely falling hard for Josh, and after having sex with him once there was no way I was going to let that be the last time. He could have kept me in his house for the next week and I would have gladly fucked him silly all day every day. But my heart was divided, and as hot and delicious as it had been with Josh, and most of all how completely acceptable and utterly normal it had been to have sex with a guy I was dating, and could date, and could have a real shot at a relationship with, the thought of Jayme and our forbidden connection was always in the back of my mind.

I cursed myself for being duplicitous. I had never been like this. I was a one-man girl. I never even overlapped my crushes. And yet here I was, thoroughly satisfied by two amazing men, each different, each special, and I wasn't ready to let either of them go. I couldn't say goodbye to Josh, and I couldn't have Jayme just be my uncle again, not with everything we'd been through.

But maybe, I thought, the fact that I'd had this amazing sexual experience with Josh would diminish my feelings for Jayme. Maybe it would, as Jayme had suggested, get something out of my system and guide me toward more normal appetites.

Or maybe not. Maybe it would just feed them.

I had slept at Josh's the night of the party, and I didn't see Jayme for the next two days because he stayed with friends. I knew he knew what had happened, I knew he was staying away on purpose, and I knew it was going to be tense and awkward and horrible when he got home. By the time he got home late Tuesday night, everyone was in bed, including me.

I heard him stop in the kitchen, predictably checking in the fridge to see what my mom had made for dinner, the way he had a thousand times in my lifetime, and I was hit with a powerful realization that there was no avoiding this. Jayme and I belonged to each other in a way that Josh and I never would. We were each other's past and future and he was my childhood and my adulthood, my fantasy and my reality. What more could Josh Hickman give me than that? And I had missed him. His absence from our house had been like the absence of sun, of birds, of vital oxygen. I needed him.

I gave him a few minutes and when he finally got into his room and quietly closed the door I tiptoed down the hall and cracked the door. He had heard me coming and sighed, still changing out of his clothes, not looking at me. I slipped in, undeterred, locking the door behind me, and padded over to him where he had stopped, defeated, his t-shirt in his hand, wearing only boxer shorts. His eyes were bloodshot and he looked terrible. Older. Sad.

He let me slip my arms around him and he held me, not like he usually did but like he should, comfortably, like an uncle hugging a niece, and my blood ran cold. He couldn't. He couldn't. We had too much between us. I buried my face in his chest and he sighed and rested his cheek on the top of my head, pulling me closer but still not what I wanted, not the type of embrace I wanted from him.

And the smell of him, the rhythm of his breath, the feel of his hands and arms, everything so familiar and desirable and just out of my grasp unsettled me. I didn't want to, but I could feel myself tearing up. Crying again just like the stupid little girl I kept trying to convince him I wasn't. I wept noiselessly into his chest, my body shaking with silent sobs, clinging to him like I would never let him go. And eventually it wore him down and he squeezed me like he usually did, and kissed my tear-stained face, and whispered over and over that he loved me, that he needed me, that he couldn't lose me, that he was out of his mind for the past few days and just wanted to wipe the whole slate clean and go back to the way it was where it didn't hurt so damn much.

We pulled each other's clothes off and just piled into bed, wrapped around each other like we couldn't get close enough, and just lay there, skin to skin, making each other no empty promises, just drowning in mutual pain and frustration but clinging to each other as we did. And eventually, exhausted, we dozed off.

I woke up first, and I was behind him, spooning him. And all the contact with no sex was too much for me. I was horny and needed him and didn't want to wait another minute. I began running my hands down his back, cupping his ass, before reaching around and caressing his penis which was semi-erect even in sleep and gently juggling his balls. His cock grew as I played with him, and he stirred. I stroked him, my pussy firmly tucked against his tight ass, my fingers smearing those first drops of pre-cum around the head of his cock, the velvet feel of him under my fingers making me wetter. I craved him, my pussy throbbed, and I wanted to fuck him so badly.

"Baby, I need you," I whispered, nibbling his ear. "I need you inside me."

He didn't need much time to wake up. He grabbed me and kissed me passionately, his tongue probing every crevice of my mouth. Together we lowered to the floor, where we wouldn't make as much noise. Jayme rolled me over on my stomach and lifted my hips so that he could enter me from behind. There was no foreplay, just his cock inside me, sinking instantly to the hilt so that his balls slapped against the backs of my legs. He kept my legs tightly pressed together as he fucked me quickly, pushing my chest down to the carpet, bracing himself with his hand on my shoulder as he pummeled my pussy.

"Oh, God," he whispered in my ear. "your pussy is so wet. Tell me why that pussy of yours is so wet." He was pinching my nipples now, clamping them between his two forefingers as he continued to drive himself into me.

'I was thinking about your hard cock inside me. I was thinking about how you'd come home and wake me up and you would fuck me with your big hard cock and I'd cum all over it."

"You bad girl," he snarled softly in my ear. "Tell me what a bad little girl you are."

"I'm a bad girl, "I replied, bucking back against him, spreading my legs so he could fuck me deeper. "I'm a nasty little whore because the only thing I really love is your cock. Your big...beautiful...hard...cock."

"You want me to fuck you all the time, don't you?"

"Yes...oh, God, yes...I want it inside me every minute of the day!"

"Even when your little boyfriend is making you cum in his bed?"

'Yes...even then...especially then...I always want to be with you...you make me feel so good...cum so hard...oh, Jayme...fuck me harder....fuck me harder..."

He groaned and complied, pounding into me, burying his cock deep within me, reaching around to rub my clit as he wallowed in my wet, tight pussy.

I moaned and growled deep in my throat, and that was all he needed. He pulled out and splashed his scalding load on my ass cheeks, where it promptly oozed down my back and into my hair. But he held me down, jerking every last drop onto my ass, then wiping it clean on my hip before grabbing a pillowcase to clean me up with.

I was still facedown on the floor, my pussy throbbing with need, as he gently wiped his sticky fluids from me, kissing behind the pillowcase as he cleaned me. I whimpered as he rolled me over and wiped my wet cunt.