This was a difficult chapter to write, but yet, so very easy. As I mentioned before, the words flew out of me, and I wrote it in a single day, unprecendented for me. If you'd like to leave me feedback, please include a return address if you want a response, or you can visit my tumblr, where I update, and you can ask questions about the story itself. Both are linked in my profile.
My editor, Zex, has either moved on to greener fields, or has sadly passed away. I have found a new editor, Zero, and he's proved up to the challenge. Zex, I'll miss you buddy.
For Zex.
Chapter 22
Mike tumbled through darkness and noise. Thunder and rain crashed down on pavement, light flashed and then darkness again. Beep - beep. Another flash of light... Sarah's voice... one of his other sisters crying...
The darkness receded. He was with his high school girlfriend again. Mike briefly forgot her name, but then it came back to him. Emily. She smiled at him and leaned over to kiss him on the cheek. The perfume she wore wafted over him and he smiled. Obsession Nights: he remembered buying her a bottle of it for Christmas. He'd forgotten how pretty Emily was. Her shoulder-length, curly blonde hair bounced down to her shoulders, beautiful green eyes that seemed to sparkle. A silver cross hung around her neck. She looked at him with a curious, sad look, and then began to cry. It seemed so innocent, the way she cried. It was almost painful to see tears on such a pure creature.
Blackness returned, then receded for a second time. He was young again and it was that horrible night. Cops were at the door and Sarah's face was a mask of pain as she nodded at the policemen.
For a long time Sarah couldn't speak, couldn't say anything to her brother and sisters as they crowded around her. Eventually she stood up and went to the bathroom. She washed her face, dried off and stared at her reflection in the mirror for a few minutes. Mike hadn't realised at the time, but looking back it seemed clear that Sarah was steeling herself for what she would have to do. She was saying goodbye to her life, her dreams, and her childhood, so she could break the news of their parents' deaths to her younger siblings, and take over as their new mother. As Mike watched, Sarah's face subtly changed, transforming into the surrogate maternal figure they had now grown used to.
Their mom and dad had been out celebrating their wedding anniversary that night, one of the few times they'd been able to get away from the five children for just a while.
Sarah returned to the couch, followed by her brother and little sisters. She began talking. She reminded her brother and sisters how much Mommy and Daddy loved them and, looking into each of their faces in turn, she told them the truth; that Mommy and Daddy were in an accident. She told them that Mommy and Daddy had been hurt and had died on the way to the hospital, and that they wouldn't be coming home. The children, though shocked, had understood. The family had recently learned about death, as their last grandparent had died.
Sarah told them that she would be taking care of them from now on, and she'd do her very best to make sure that they had everything they ever wanted. She held her siblings in her arms until the next morning, until the tears had fallen and the sobs had stopped.
Mike was trapped in a strange state that was half remembering and half being there. He thought of all the visits Sarah had to endure with the people from the State as she dealt with the bureaucracy involved in taking over parenting her brother and sisters. He thought of Sarah's graduation, and how she finally broke down when a friend of her father's told her of how proud he would have been of her. She'd clutched at the man's shoulder as her shoulders shook with sobs of pent-up anguish. He thought of the funeral, how many people had shown up. He hadn't realized that so many people had known their parents. He remembered Aunt Stacy and her family, his aunt and uncle, tears in their eyes as the eulogy was delivered by a family friend.
He thought of Danni, and how she'd changed. She'd been an outgoing girl before the accident, but afterwards, it seemed her mission was to give Sarah grief. She was always trying to sneak out or coming home with a boy, testing Sarah's authority and limits. The eldest sister had an iron resolve and never budged an inch, much to Danni's frustration. Their parents' death seemed to have precipitated this rebellious streak in Danni, causing her to want to go out more, misbehave more, take more chances.
Beth's reaction couldn't have been more different. She had always been studious, but she practically lived in books after the accident. Mike was the only one of the siblings she would talk to for several months, for some reason. She'd been closest to her father of all the girls, a genuine daddy's girl. Perhaps it was because Mike looked so much like his dad, even as a young man.
Emma plunged herself into sports, joining anything she could: cheerleading, track, volleyball, softball, basketball, swimming. She even considered trying out for the football team, but Sarah wouldn't allow it.
Eventually, Mike's strange, detached perspective turned inward, upon himself. He realised that he had first heard his lascivious internal voice just a few months after his parents passed away. It had started talking to him after he'd seen a dirty scene in a movie. He'd only heard it intermittently, maybe once a month, for several years and he had been able to mostly ignore it. But then when he became a senior it had become more intrusive. During one of his very few make out sessions with Emily, she'd let him play with her breasts under her shirt for the first time. The voice told Mike to tear her clothes off. His response had been to mentally tell it to shut the fuck up. He didn't hear it for several months after that.
The darkness fell again. When it cleared this time it was replaced by searing white light that stabbed at Mike's eyes as he struggled to open them. He tried to raise his hands to shade his face but something heavy prevented him from moving them.
'Blankets,' he thought. 'I'm in bed, but what the...?' How much of what he had experienced had been a dream?
He freed his hands from under the blanket, laid a palm across his face to block out the light and slowly opened his eyes. The light forced its way in around the cracks and creases around his fingers. His eyes slowly adjusted and he could see that there were several other people in the room.
"Sarah, he's moving," someone said. It sounded familiar, but he couldn't place it.
He felt a hand on his shoulder, soft, and gentle.
"Mike?" Sarah asked softly.
Mike opened his mouth to speak, but it was dry and nothing came out. He heard water pouring into a cup. The plastic rim touched his lips and the cool liquid poured in, drenching his dry mouth. He swallowed and felt the delicious water ease his throat.
"Want some more?" she asked.
He shook his head. The small movement made his neck and back ache.
"Try not to move, sweetie," she said. "You're pretty banged up."
Mike tried to speak again. His voice rasped roughly. "Where am I?"
Sarah, leaned closer. "You're in the ICU in the hospital, sweetheart. You were in an accident. You were the most seriously hurt out of all of us." He felt her tender caress across his forehead. "You've got cracked ribs, and the doctor was afraid you wouldn't wake up, as you had a nasty bang on your head."
"I was in an accident?"
There was silence for a moment, and finally Sarah spoke again, "Yes sweetie. You were driving Matt and Emma home from the club we were at."
Mike groaned in discomfort. "Was I drunk or something?" he asked.
"No sweetie," Sarah replied.
"That red-headed sonofabitch shot out your tire, man," said Matt, a note of puzzlement in his voice.
Mike was silent for a long while. "Who?"
The question seemed to strike everyone dumb for a few moments.
"How much... what... what's the last thing you remember, sweetie?" Sarah asked, her voice unsteady.
Mike sat quietly for a while, thinking. "I don't know, it's all sort of hazy. I remember Emma and me starting our first year of college. I remember going to class some. After that it's all sort of...gray. I dunno...I just...I can't..."
There was a silence, followed by Sarah's broken voice. "Sweetheart, that was about a year ago."
"That can't be right," he said, after a lengthy silence.
Sarah seemed unable to find her voice. She looked as if she were afraid she'd break down crying if she tried to speak.
Mike slipped back into sleep. He dreamed of Emily again. He smelled her perfume again and it brought more memories. Their vacation with friends to Padre Island drifted into his dream: how gorgeous she had looked in a bikini, still so sweet and innocent and pure looking. He'd almost felt evil for ogling her. They had sat on the beach together, holding hands as the waves washed around them. That was when she'd told him she was heading off to go to school in California.
Mike had cared about her, but doubted he was in love with her. Losing her didn't feel great, but it was okay. They'd had a good time together and they parted the best of friends. Things could have been a lot worse.
Someone shone a light in his eyes and something cold pressed against his chest. A doctor or a nurse checking him over. She finished her work and he heard the soft click of the door being closed.
He heard the low murmur of two people talking in the room, and he opened his eyes. It was easier this time and the light didn't hurt so damn bad. The first person he saw was Sarah. She was curled up in a chair beside his bed, her head resting on his thigh, softly breathing as she slept. He looked around and saw Missy, asleep in a chair by the window, her head propped on a couch pillow. Next to her, Emma and Matt were talking, both looked normal, though Matt seemed to have a bruise on the side of his head. Beth and Danni were curled up together, Beth holding her smaller sister while they bother snored softly.
He shifted: the movement woke Sarah and caught Emma and Matt's attention. Sarah lifted her head and saw Mike's blue eyes staring down at her. "Hi," he said, as if it were a normal day.
She chuckled and stood, moving to hug him as gently as she could. "Can I get you something?" she asked.
Mike felt his stomach gurgle. "How many days has it been? I'm starving."
"It's been nearly a week, sweetie. Your body has been expending extra energy trying to heal itself, so I'm not surprised you're hungry. I'll see when breakfast can be here."
Emma appeared by his side. She leaned down and kissed him on the head. "You scared me," she said, tears in her eyes. "I thought... we all thought we might lose you."
Mike tried to give her a reassuring squeeze, but pain shot through him.
"I'm sorry Em," he said, though he knew it wasn't really his fault, and she wasn't accusing him of anything.
Matt stood, his movement finally waking the other three in the room. "Hey bro," he said. "You need anything? Titty-mag, beer?"
