Josh Nows Best

Many thanks to JordanJohnson for his help editing.

Enjoy. Let me know what works and what does not.

Peace.

======

Mom's admin job for the school did not end over the summer; there were never-ending reports to be assembled and filed with the school district, as well as the State and Federal Departments of Education. She continued to work at the bar Friday and Saturday nights.

I worked forty hours a week at the diner. I tried to work as many daytime shifts as possible, even breakfast, which totally blew since breakfast tips sucked. Breakfast diners tended to think Nixon was still President. They believed a half-dollar was a big tip.

Working days meant I was home at night. We fell into an easy routine. Whoever got home first made dinner. Whoever made dinner relaxed while the other did the few dishes. Mom complained my dinners were always fancier so there were more dishes. I started washing the prep and mixing bowls as I went along. When she realized what I was doing she made me stop and apologized for saying anything about it.

In retrospect, it seems to me we made love every night one of us was not working. I doubt that could be true but I will always hope that was so.

I will not claim every night was a new adventure. Many nights, or days, we simply loved each other then fell asleep in each other's arms. Few people find even something as simple as that in this life.

I always recall some lines from

Just Breathe

by Pearl Jam when I stray into self-pity:

Oh, I'm a lucky man

To count on both hands

The ones I love

Some folks just have one

Yeah, others they got none

Our time was shorter than either of us imagined but I'm not bitter.

I was blessed. We were blessed. We are blessed.

There are so few specific memories. After mom was gone, I vowed I would pay attention to, and remember, every moment in my life; I would never again lose someone and be left with a handful of memories.

I tried. Even so, when I look back over a week or a month and try to remember the specific details of a day, I am horrified there are so few concrete, specific memories.

But there are some.

I could go all unreliable narrator on you and include details about dinner, what we watched on TV, etc. but I'll spare you. I will not even pretend I recall the actual date, though I am sure it was not long after the day we met Maggie and Nora at the lake.

"What do you fantasize about when you masturbate, Josh?"

I was nuzzling the side of her neck and pressing my cock into her side at the time, so her question took me by surprise.

"Different things," I replied, kissing her behind the ear.

"No kidding?" Mom snorted and elbowed me, gently. "Don't try to distract me. Be honest. I'm your mother and I'm fucking you, so shock is no longer on the menu for us."

"Why do you want to know? I'm not trying to be a smart ass. I fantasize about a lot of things."

"A lot of different acts or a lot of different people?"

We were lying on our sides by then facing each other.

"Both," I replied.

She rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Okay, when did you masturbate last?"

I dropped my eyes. "When I got home from work this afternoon," I admitted.

"Today? In the hour before I got home?" Mom was clearly taken aback.

"Uh, yeah. Do we have to talk about this?"

Mom sighed. "I'm sorry. I told you nothing would shock me, then I reacted like that. I'm not shocked. Surprised. Not shocked."

"Well, being nineteen is good for something I guess."

She kissed me then. "It's good for many things. Besides you're not nineteen yet. Three more weeks. We don't have to talk about this but I would like to." I nodded. "Okay," she said after kissing me again. "What did you fantasize about this afternoon when you masturbated."

"You."

"Just me?"

"No," I confessed. She reached over and play pinched my nipple.

"Joshua, just tell me."

"Maybe I should insist you do that stuff to my nipples again."

"Happy to. Was that what you fantasized about?"

"No." I did not say anything else. I held in my laughter until I saw her start to reach for my nipple again.

"Brat," she teased.

"There was someone else with us," I confessed. Mom settled back onto her pillow. "Maggie," I added. Mom smiled.

"I was fucking her. I was sitting on a chair and she was sitting on my cock, facing away, her back to my front. I was playing with her boobs."

"What was I doing?"

"You were on your knees, tonguing her clit and my cock as I fucked her."

"Wow. That's hot."

"You think so?"

"Of course."

"Have you ever done that?"

"Had a threesome?"

"No, had sex with another woman, gone down on a woman."

"Yes," mom answered. No hesitation. "In college a couple of times. Before I met your father."

"You went down on them?"

"Yes. And vice versa."

"You ate their pussy, in other words."

"Are those the words you like to hear? Do you like the idea of me eating pussy?"

"Yes. I've imagined you eating out Maggie while I fuck you from behind."

"Is Maggie the only other woman you imagine being with?"

I shook my head. "Don't laugh, but Ms. Lang."

"Why would I laugh? I'd be happy to eat her pussy."

Mom smirked at the look on my face. "What? Nora is a babe. You've seen her."

"I thought

nude isn't lewd

."

"It's not. I didn't bury my face in her pussy at the lake but I sure noticed she's a babe. You're at a disadvantage. Your cock is happy to betray you. I can be aroused and unless I'm

really

aroused you won't be able to tell by simply looking. Nora's body definitely sent a few tingles to my nether regions."

"Nether regions?" I snorted. "Seriously? You going to start talking about your naughty bits? Admit it. Nora made you wet."

"She did. What about Nora? You ever imagine you're fucking her while I'm licking her clit?"

I settled for a nod.

"What about all three of us? Me, Nora and Maggie?"

"No, not until just this moment. Thanks for the idea."

"What's a mother for?"

We stared at each other for a moment and then burst into laughter. I laughed so hard my ribs hurt.

"Have you been in a threesome?" I asked after getting myself under control.

"No. Your father always wanted to try it with a friend of his. I couldn't stand the guy, the friend, not your father. Both of 'em, actually. And I would never subject any of my friends to your father."

"You mean the sperm donor wanted to fuck you with another man?"

"Uh-huh," she gave me a questioning look. "Threesomes aren't just two woman and a man, my young Padawan."

I nodded. I mean sure, that made sense but I'd feel weird with another naked dude in bed.

"No, Joshua, that doesn't mean the men are gay or even bi," mom sighed, once more reading my thoughts. "Where do you get this insecurity from? Your father, please don't call him 'sperm donor', was as straight as they come. Still, he wanted me to fuck him along with one of his buddies."

"You mean like one of them in your pussy and the other in your ass?"

"I'm not sure," she answered. "Or maybe just watch me with him or me blowing him while getting fucked. But, yeah, maybe he had DP in mind." I must have started because I got an eyeroll. "Don't act so surprised. We've done that already. A dildo and a cock. I can think of a few guys I wouldn't mind joining us."

I rose up on one arm. "Seriously?"

"Why not? Assuming such a guy existed. One who would not freak out when he realized the other guy was my son. What about you? If Maggie or Nora was okay with incest, would you share me with one of them?" I nodded. "But not with another guy? That's silly, Josh."

"I guess. I mean, I get it but the idea still freaks me out in a way another woman wouldn't and not just because of the gay aspect. I'd be jealous."

"At least you admit it. Now work on it."

"Your turn. What do you fantasize about when you masturbate?"

"Who says I masturbate anymore? Now that I have a virile young man with a lusty cock at my beck and call."

"You don't?"

"No, I do." Her face scrunched up and through her laughter she added, "I masturbated today at lunch. I closed my door and masturbated at my desk."

"You did not!?"

"Sure, I did. Old fussy butt Stewart wasn't in. It's not the first time I've decompressed that way. In fact, since we've been fucking, I've masturbated more than ever. You re-awoke something that had nearly died inside me, baby."

"Happy to be of service. So, what did you think about while you were getting all nasty in your office?"

"I read about a hotel in New York a few years ago. It's near an elevated park the city built atop an old train line. For some reason, couples began to have sex in the windows and people walking on the Greenway, that's the name of the park, would gather to watch. I imagined I was pressed up against the window with a whole crowd of people watching me being fucked from behind."

"Was I the one fucking you?"

"Most of the time, sometimes my mind would flip to another guy, but mostly you."

"Who was the other guy?"

"I guy I dated in college. You never met him."

"Why him?"

"Nostalgia? I don't know. He wasn't as good a lover as you."

"Was his cock bigger?"

"No," mom groaned. "Men and their insecurities. Jesus."

"Just curious about why he was in your fantasy. That's all."

"Nostalgia is the best answer I can give you, sweetheart."

I nodded. "Were you in love with him?"

"I thought I was. Maybe I was. He moved back to Colorado after school and that was it."

"You could probably find him on social media." I could not believe I even thought that much less said it aloud. Was I out of my fucking mind?

"He's probably married with a zillion kids. My life is here. Mom is going to need more help over the next few years."

She was wrong on the last point. Mom's death stole a big piece of Nana's joy, if not her life. She would outlive mom by five years. The cause was listed as "heart failure". Her heart did not fail. It was broken. All our hearts were broken.

I was tired of talking. I rolled half on top of her and kissed her as I ground my cock against her thigh. I pushed my leg between hers. Her pussy was hot and wet and she began to hump my leg.

I rolled back, pulling her on top of me. My cock throbbed, trapped between her and my stomach. I urged her to sit up. Hands on her hips I helped her rock atop my cock as she squeezed and tugged at her breasts.

"Don't cum, okay?"

She nodded; eyes closed.

She continued, tilting her pelvis, massaging her boobs, chewing at her lower lip for an eternity that lasted a mere instant. Then, she lifted herself off my body and knelt beside me.

"I'm so close," she whimpered.

"Lie down beside me," I suggested. When she did, I kissed her, softly, slowly, running my hands through her hair, until I felt the tension melt from her body.

Once she had come back from the edge, I scooted to the side of the bed and sat up. She frowned.

"Where are you going..."

Her voice trailed off as I held out my hand. She took it and moved to sit beside me. "Stand up, please." She did as I asked, standing between my legs. I leaned forward and kissed her belly button. "Turn around." She did as I asked without question, without hesitation. Her trust in me caused my body to tremble with emotion.

I rested my hands on her hips, taking deep breaths, getting control of myself.

I rubber her lower back, her sides, her legs. I moved my butt to the edge of the bed.

"Step back for a moment. Let me put my legs together," I whispered. "Okay, come back. Your legs outside of mine. Straddle them." She shuffled backward. "Are you comfortable?" She nodded.

I kissed her back. "Put my cock in you," I whispered.

She reached between her legs and lowered herself onto my cock. She let her weight rest on my legs, taking me deep into her welcoming body. I leaned back on my elbows.

"Fuck yourself on my cock, Janice. Play with your boobs, your clit, while you ride my cock imagine Nora and Maggie are taking turns kissing your thighs, licking your clit with my cock buried inside you."

Mom shuddered, then began to move. Hands on her hips I helped her ride my cock. She paused when my cock slipped from her pussy; with one hand she guided my cock back home.

She tugged at her breasts.

Circled her clit.

She spread herself with one hand and began to slap her clit with the other. Her body stiffened. Her gasps grew ragged. She drew in a deep breath and held it.

That was my cue.

I rose from the bed, holding her around the waist. She was able to reach the wall with one hand to steady herself as I gave in to my lust.

My thrusts were fast, deep. Once more the bedroom rang to the sounds of flesh on flesh and incoherent cries of passion, followed by shouts of release.

Her orgasm left her limp in my arms as I filled her with my love. I held her around the waist, unable to stop thrusting as our excitement ran in rivulets down the insides of her legs. At last, I staggered back to our bed. I tried to sit but missed and landed on the floor, cradling Janice, my mother, my love and my lover against my body.

†

The summer passed in a blur. The five of us, me, mom, Ms. Porter, Nora and Maggie met almost every Sunday at the lake. Our friendships grew. Despite mom's not so subtle hints and pushes, Maggie and I continued as friends. I did not deny I was interested but did not see the point of starting something when we would be departing for different universities in a few weeks.

That was mostly the truth. Mom accepted it. Or she decided further prodding would be counterproductive.

I could tell mom was tired but she would not give up her job at the bar. We still had a crazy amount of sex, some of it pretty wild. I lost some of my insecurities. The first time she blew me with a finger in my ass, I did not decompensate into a troubled questioning blob afterward. I admitted it felt good and I came harder than I ever had from a simple blowjob. And that includes the mind-bending blowjobs Janice was capable of delivering.

We made good use of the dildo - on her. We never got around to her trying it on me. Reverse cowgirl, my cock in her ass, dildo in her pussy became a favorite of ours.

It was a great summer. A glorious summer.

†

I woke up one morning and realized in three weeks I would be leaving for college. I suspected Mom was more aware of the fact than I had been. She had been different lately; in a way not explained by her reports of

just tired

. She was begging off of sex, though when we did make love or fuck, it was never less than great. Often it was fucking amazing.

She had even skipped the lake the previous weekend.

I reached for her; her side of the bed was empty. As I wondered where she was, it was too early for her to be getting ready for work, I heard her retching in the bathroom.

"Mom, you okay?" I called as I rolled out of bed and hurried to the bathroom. The door was locked.

"Yes, something I ate last night isn't agreeing with me. Just give me some privacy, baby. Okay?"

"Uh, sure. You sure you're, okay?"

"Yes, honey. Take your cereal outside, okay?" With that I heard her begin to retch again.

"Mom?"

"Josh! Go away! Please!"

I much as I wanted to help, I understood. I hated being sick around people. I went back to the bedroom, yanked on my shorts, and grabbed the OJ out of the fridge. It was already warm outside. I sat at our old picnic table and finished off the juice.

When I went back inside, Mom was at the table with a piece of dry toast in front of her and a cup of tea. She was pale and had dark circles under her eyes.

"You are calling in..."

"I already have," Mom said, cutting me off. She patted my hand. "You work today?" I shook my head.

"I'm going to spend the day in bed or on the couch. Why don't you go hang out with Jeff? I could use the privacy."

"He's in Wisconsin. At the lake."

"Give Maggie a call, then. I know you, baby. You'll hover. You can't help it. I just want to sleep today. Okay?"

I nodded. She was right but I didn't see how she expected me to go off and have fun while she was sick at home. "Okay, I'll see what Maggie is up to. Maybe chill at the library or something."

"Good. Don't worry about me. I'm fine. I feel better now that I've thrown up. I hope it was something I ate last night and not some kind of stomach flu, otherwise you may be next." She patted my hand and stood up. "Beat it, Josh. Go splurge on breakfast. All you've done this summer is work."

I waggled my eyebrows. "That's not all I've done."

She smiled and patted my cheek. "True. You've been wonderful."

With that she made her way back to the bedroom and closed the door quietly behind her.

I dressed in my old bedroom to avoid bothering her. She was asleep when I tiptoed in to retrieve my phone. I sat back down at the picnic table and called Maggie.

"Hello?" she croaked.

"Shit, Maggie, sorry, I forgot how early it was. Go back to sleep. Sorry. I'll call you later. Fuck." I started to end the call when her voice stopped me.

"It's fine, Josh. Is everything okay?"

"I'll talk to you later. I'm sorry."

"Quit saying you're sorry and tell me why you call. Jeez, dude."

"Mom isn't feeling well and kicked me outta the house. I was calling to see if you wanted to get breakfast."

There was silence for a moment.

"Yeah, sure. Where? Can we go somewhere besides the diner?"

"Yeah, cool. Wherever you want."

"I'll pick you up in thirty minutes or so."

"I'll be in the backyard. Just come on around."

"Cool."

It was more like an hour before I heard Maggie's flipflops on the driveway. I met her at the side of the house. "Let me check and make sure mom doesn't need anything and I'll be right with you."

"Grab your suit in case we decide to go swimming."

I nodded and when inside. The house was quiet and for a moment I was sure I would find my mother dead in her bed. I have struggled all my life trying to convince myself that was not a premonition. I tapped lightly on the door.

"Mom, you okay? I'm going to hang out with Maggie. I have my phone. Call if you need anything."

"Go have fun. I'm feeling better already. Just tired. You might as well eat while you're out. I don't think I'll feel like cooking tonight."

"Okay but promise me you'll call."

"Of course, sweetheart."

Maggie was waiting in the shade of the open breezeway that connected the house to the detached garage.

"Your mom, okay?"

"Yeah, just a stomach bug or something. She says she's feeling better. She said I should hang out with you all day. If I hadn't heard her puking this morning, I'd swear she was trying to set us up."

"Would that be so terrible?"

I stopped and looked at Maggie. At first, she kept walking. I waited until she stopped and I had her attention before I answered.

"No, Maggie. That would not be so terrible." I was surprised to hear myself speaking the truth and immediately felt guilt twisted at my guts. I almost told Maggie I had changed my mind. That I would just hang out at the house but she nodded, turned, and kept walking before I could speak.

I was so distracted, trying to figure out what was wrong with me, I didn't even notice Ms. Lang sitting in the passenger seat with the car door open.

"You want shotgun, Joshua?"

I stared at her for a moment, then shook my head. "No, Ms. Lang, I mean Nora. I'm fine in the back."

"Nora and I had plans today, Josh," Maggie said, opening the driver's door. "We're happy to share them with you. You sounded kind of down on the phone. That cool?"

"Yeah, totally."

I was too embarrassed to eat like I do in front of Mom. Even so, I ate twice as much as Nora.

"We were going to go to the lake," Nora mentioned.