It's the Way You Loo at Me

This is a work of fiction. Names, character's, businesses, places, events and incidents are either products of the authors imagination or used in a factitious manor. Any resemblance to actual events is purely coincidental.

*****

"I'm going to run," I whispered. "Do you want to come?"

"Not today," she yawned. "Maybe tomorrow."

Jamie wasn't a runner. She was in very good shape and did exercise, but running wasn't her thing. I kissed her softly and said I would be back in a while. I took off and ran around the city. I returned home and opened the door panting hard.

"Owen," Jamie cried. I could clearly hear the pain in her voice as she called my name. Something was really wrong as the hairs on my head tingled.

"What is it baby?" I asked.

"I just got off the phone with my dad," she whimpered. "It's grandpa."

"Oh no," I gasped. "He's gone isn't he?"

"Yeah," she sobbed.

"Fuck," I cried.

I took Jamie into my arms and held her as we both cried. We knew grandpa was old but he was still in good health so this was a sudden passing. I was glad that I had spent some time with him when I went home to graduate.

"What happened?" I asked.

She sniffled and wiped her eyes before she spoke. "Thursday he had a heart attack. He passed that evening."

"And he's just now calling you? It's freaking Saturday."

"There's nothing I could do from here anyway," she sighed. "He's been busy with your dad making arrangements for everything."

I shrugged. She was right, there was nothing we could do from here.

"He says your dad has been trying to reach you," she continued.

"Yeah, I figured as much."

"How are you going to explain why you haven't returned his calls?"

"I don't know," I sighed. "I'll figure something out. When is the funeral?"

"It's Monday."

"When are we leaving?"

"Today if we can. If that's ok with you?"

"Let's get packing and going," I sighed.

"What are you going to tell your dad?" she asked again.

"I don't know," I said frustrated. "I'll figure it out. I'll tell him I've been busy or something."

"You know he's going to be mad."

"That goes without saying," I sighed. "Let's just drop it for now and get going."

"Sorry Owen," she offered. "I'm just worried about what's going to happen when we get home."

"I'll deal with it babe," I sighed. "Let's not worry about it for now."

Jamie started calling the airport to see if we could get a flight home today. I started packing our things and setting them by the door so we could go at a moment's notice. The whole time I was thinking about what I was going to say to my dad. He was going to be pissed when I got home. There was no questioning that. He'd want an answer as to why I hadn't talked to him in a month.

We got onto a plane about two hours later and started the long journey home. We landed in New York and met Ariel at the curb to give her some of our stuff before we caught another flight to Florida where Uncle Buck picked us up at the airport.

"Where have you been Owen?" he asked once we got on the road.

"I've been in New York working out and training," I lied.

"Your dad is awfully pissed off you haven't called him in a while. He's even more mad that he couldn't get ahold of you."

"I know," I sighed.

"I'm just giving you fair warning that he's going to be pissed off when he sees you."

"Yeah," I sighed again. "It's just one of those things. You get busy and you forget."

"Sure Owen," Uncle Buck sighed. "I'm not buying it but it doesn't bother me like it's going to bother him."

"Daddy," Jamie sighed. "He went with me to Europe. He knew Uncle Dan would be upset if he said anything so he didn't. And if it's not too much to ask, can you not say anything?"

"Sure honey," he smiled. "I won't bring it up but if he corners me I can't make and promises. But ah... why didn't you just say that in the first place?"

"You know how he is Uncle Buck," I sighed. "He's going to be pissed. I know exactly what he is going to say. You should be in New York training with the team."

"He probably has a good point," he offered. "But it's your life and he can't tell you what to do anymore."

"He can certainly try though," I sighed.

"What were you two doing over there together anyway?" he asked.

"It's kind of scary over there all by myself," Jamie offered. "I felt better having Owen with me."

"Is it safe over there where you are?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said quickly. "It's just...you know? It's different being alone in a different country and not knowing where you are going or anything like that."

"I guess," he smiled. "So how was it besides that?"

"We had a good time," she smiled. "We got to see some pretty cool stuff between all the work I was doing."

"Where were you this time around?" he asked.

We talked for a while now about the time we spent together. It passed the time quickly until we started to head into town.

"Can you take me to the Williams' house?" I asked. "I left my truck at Shane's and he said he put it over there so it was out of the way."

"I thought I saw it driving around town a few weeks ago," he said. "I thought I was seeing things."

"I told him not to be driving it around," I hissed.

"That was over a month ago," Uncle Buck offered.

We made a couple of turns until we reached the Williams' house. I climbed out of the car and grabbed my bag from the trunk. Uncle Buck warned me again that my dad wasn't going to be happy when he saw me. I shrugged and told them I would see them later. I knew I would have to face it sooner or later so I climbed into the cab and headed home. Sure enough, he was waiting for me and was pissed off.

"It's nice of you to show up," my dad barked. "Where the fuck have you been?"

"It's nice to see you too dad," I quipped.

"Cut the crap Owen," he snapped. "Where have you been?"

"New York," I said calmly. "Where do you think I've been?"

"Then why can't I get ahold of you when I call you?" he hissed.

"I've just been busy dad," I sighed calmly.

"Bull shit," he hissed angrily. "Don't try and pull that, I've been busy, shit with me. How come nobody can get ahold of you? Uncle Buck has tried to call you too."

"I just told you," I shot back. "I've been busy. I've been working with a quarterback coach on my mechanics and when I haven't been with him I've been training my ass off to get into better shape."

"You couldn't call me once in a while and tell me how your life is going? I haven't seen you since you graduated in May."

"Because I've been busy dad," I hissed now.

"I get that Owen," he fired right back. "I've been busy in my life too but that doesn't mean I couldn't take five minutes to call somebody and let them know how I've been doing."

"I meant to call but I get caught up and I lose track of time."

"Sure Owen," he sighed angrily. "So, how have things been going in New York?"

"Well," I sighed. It threw me off a little that he gave up so easily and changed the subject. "Alright for now. I've been busy working on my mechanics so I have more drive on the ball when I throw. When I haven't been doing that, I've been busting my butt off to get into better shape."

"Really?" he questioned with a serious undertone.

"Yeah," I said firmly.

"Put the damn shovel down Owen," he said bluntly. "Quit digging yourself deeper into the hole."

"What are you talking about?"

"You take me for a fool?" he barked. "I wasn't born yesterday Owen."

"I never said you were a fool," I said quickly.

"Do you remember what I did for a living Owen?"

"Yeah, it's kind of hard to forget that."

"I was in intelligence for the last twelve years I was in the Corps Owen. But it doesn't take a great detective to figure out you are lying your ass off right now."

"I'm not lying dad," I said firmly.

"Bull shit Owen. Stop fucking lying to me."

"I'm not."

"Really?" he asked smugly. "Then your friends must be lying."

"What friends?" I asked.

He shook his head before he looked at me sternly again. "Do you remember graduation? Remember all of us standing around after you had walked? It was me and you and your friends and some of their parents standing around talking."

"Yeah," I said uneasy. Where the hell was this going?

"You went with grandpa to show him where the bathroom was. One of them asked where you went. Another said you probably went to call your girlfriend. Another said you two had broken up. The first guy said you guys were back together again. They joked about it for a minute until they looked at me and asked me. Did Owen and Jamie get back together?"

My face must have turned white as he said that. I knew he knew and shit was about to hit the fan.

"After I picked my jaw up off the floor I told them I didn't get into your affairs since it was too hard to keep track of things in your life. But I did ask how long you and this Jamie girl had been together. One of them said you guys had been together for forever. Another said you guys had been together since high school but you had broken up when she took some job that had her leaving the country."

"They were just misunderstanding the facts," I lied.

"Bull shit Owen," he barked.

"She came to visit me once in a while," I shot back.

"It's too much of a coincidence," he barked again. "And I have more than just them telling me about your lies. I did a little more digging into the matter. I searched social media and found a few pictures of you and Jamie together on some of their pages. You guys looked a little closer than just some friendly visits."

"But I dug deeper still. I found out where your mail was being forwarded to. I got the number and called it just to see. I talked with an Ariel and she said you were out of the country with your girlfriend Jamie. After that I called in a favor and had them run your passport. London, Milan, Paris, and New York all hit. The same places Jamie has been."

"So," he said looking at me hard. "I know for a certain fact that you have been lying. You lied to me about being in New York all this time. You've lied to me about your girlfriends and why I've never gotten to meet any of them. You've been lying to me for over four years now. The only thing I didn't realize is how big, how deep, how complex, and how much of a fucked bunch of lies you have been telling me all this time."

I stood there stunned. I didn't even know what to say or where to start.

"The only thing left for you to do right now is to come clean on your lies and tell me what is going on. And don't try and twist it all around or dig yourself deeper. A dozen people have told me they have seen you with Jamie and that you two are together. The pictures don't lie and the passports don't either."

"I'm sorry dad," I said softly. "I don't know what to say."

"Tell me what the fuck is going on with you and Jamie," he said coldly. "I've got all the facts, the writing was on the wall the whole time I just never put two and two together until I started digging. I've seen the way you two are around each other and it all makes sense now. The only thing left for you to do is tell me the truth."

"Do you really want to do this now?" I asked. "With everything that's going on, do you really want to do this now?"

"The situation isn't going to change the truth Owen. Do you think that in a week this is going to be easier?"

"No, but I don't think this is the time or the place for this," I replied.

"Then don't say anything Owen," he snapped. "Just go on and keep pretending everything is all fine and dandy."

"Is that going to make it better?" I asked. "Is hearing it somehow going to make it ok? If you know what's going on then why do you want to hear me say it?"

"Because I hate a fucking liar," he barked. "I can't stand them. I never thought my own son would be such a liar. Fuck, I thought I raised you better than that."

"Fine, fuck it," I hissed. "What do I have to lose anyway? It ain't going to change a damn thing. I'm still going to love Jamie even after you tell me to go to hell. But before I tell you what you already know, try to understand how much I really care for Jamie. Try to understand how deep my feelings for her really are. I love that woman with all my heart and I couldn't see myself without her by my side."

"Owen," he said shaking his head in dismay. "Just say it."

"Jamie and I are together, in love, and very, very happy to be together."

"You are fucked up," he snapped. "Where the fuck did I go wrong with you?"

"It's nothing you did. It just happened."

"Did you go blind or something Owen?" he cried. He was irate now. "Did you take a shot to the head that fucked you up somehow? How the fuck did you wind up with your cousin? You need to go see a doctor to figure out what the fuck is wrong with you."

"Fuck you dad," I roared. "And you wonder why I lied to you about everything."

"Because you are fucked up," he yelled back. "Fucked up in the head and in need of some serious help. Jamie too for that matter."

"Shut the fuck up dad!" I yelled louder now. "Take your shots at me but you better fucking leave Jamie out of this."

"Get the fuck out of my house!" he roared. "Get the fuck out of here!"

"This is why," I hollered back. "This is why I lied. Because you wouldn't understand. You don't understand how much Jamie means to me. The only person who would was mom. She would have understood."

"Goddammit!" he snapped.

He launched himself at me and punched me right in the face. The blow knocked me back before he grabbed me again in a big bear hug. He drove me back until I slammed into the wall. The drywall busted and left a big hole in the wall as a few pictures and knickknacks fell to the floor. I reacted quickly and hooked my arms around him. I put my leg out and spun him around until he tripped over it and fell to the floor. I was free now and took off to the door.

"How fucking dare you bring your mother into this? Get your ass back here so I can kick it."

"You're a fucking psycho," I yelled as I raced to the door. "I'm not getting into a fist fight with you."

He stumbled to his feet to give chase. I heard him crash into the chairs at the kitchen table as I reached the door.

"You fucking son of a bitch!" he cried. "You are not my son. Get the fuck out of here and don't ever come back!"

I was out the door and in my truck. I fired up the engine and put it in reverse, burning rubber all the way down the driveway. He was at the door still shouting at me.

"You ever come back around here and I'm going to kill you."

"I will be here tomorrow to pay my respects to Grandpa," I called. "I hope you have the decency to let me to that."

He grabbed a brick paver as I put it into drive and punched the pedal to the floor again. The tires spun down the street leaving black marks and smoke as he threw the paver. It landed harmlessly in the road behind the truck as I raced away.

I raced through the streets towards Uncle Buck's now. I left black marks at each stop sign as I hurried to get there. I was shaking so bad by the time I pulled to a screeching stop on the road at Uncle Buck's. I left the truck running as I raced for the house and went right on inside.

"Jamie," I called. "Come on, we have to go."

"Why? What happened?"

"My dad went fucking crazy. Come on."

"What happened to your face?" Jamie cried.

"I don't have time to explain. Get in the truck. We have to go."

"What the hell is going on?" Uncle Buck asked.

"My dad punched me and blew up. I have to get Jamie out of here."

"What the hell is going on?" Uncle Buck called again.

"He knows Jamie," I cried. "He knows. Come on, we have to get out of here. I'm afraid of what he might do. He snapped. He fucking snapped."

Jamie knew exactly what I meant when I said that. She didn't hesitate and quickly pushed herself out of the chair and followed me to the door.

"Where are you going?" Uncle Buck called.

"I have to go daddy," she called back. "I'll call you in a while and explain."

"What the hell?" he called.

Jamie and I hurried to the truck and took off. I punched the pedal to the floor again not knowing whether my dad was coming this way or not. I had no idea what he was capable of at this point. The only thing I knew was I needed to get Jamie away from any chance of him finding her or me.

"You told him now? Of all the times to tell him you chose now?"

"He figured it out Jamie. He figured it out at graduation. My friends said it by accident that I was with you. Then he went digging and found everything he needed to know. Fuck!"

"Oh no!" she gasped. "I never thought about that. How could we be so stupid?"

"How could they have known Jamie? We were just us when we were at college. They didn't know anything other than that."

"Does my dad know?" she asked.

"Do you really think he would have been quiet about it?"

"What do we do?" she asked in a panic. "He knows too much as it is. He's going to call your dad and want to know why you got hit."

"Fuck," I croaked. "I don't know. I guess call him. Call him and get him to meet us at a hotel or something so we can tell him. Do it now before he calls my dad."

She sighed long and hard before she pulled her phone from her pocket and started dialing her dad.

*

There was a soft knock at the door. Jamie opened it and let Uncle Buck in.

"What the hell happened between you two Owen? Gosh damn, I've never seen him hit you before."

"Sit down dad," Jamie said taking charge. "We have something we need to tell you."

"Ok?" he said unsure.

"Owen got hit because he said something that is very hard for us to tell people. It's not something you would expect from the two of us. We both understand if you don't like it but it's what we have chosen to do together. There's nothing you can do to change the way we feel."

"Ok?" he said still very lost.

"Daddy, Owen and I have been together for over four years now. I'm in love with him."

If a picture paints a thousand words, Uncle Buck's face painted about three thousand. He looked stunned, then lost, then confused, before finally having a blank expression.

"Daddy," Jamie said softly. "I love this man. He makes me feel like I'm the only woman in the world. I can't see myself without him by my side."

Uncle Buck's hands pointed and swirled around as he tried to find the words to talk. Nothing came out as he tried to figure out what to say.

"I know this is crazy but I can't change the way my heart feels. I love him with all of mine. If you don't understand that's ok. We have made this choice together and want a life together. We want you to be a part of our lives but if you can't accept us then we understand."

"Holy shit," he finally spoke slowly.

"I love Jamie Uncle Buck," I said softly. "I've been in love with her since we were eighteen years old. I can't live my life without her. We aren't asking you to jump for joy and say that you are happy for us. We just want you to know that we are together and we would like you to understand that we love each other."

"I don't want you to hate me daddy. I want you to understand how much Owen means to me. If you hate me and never want me to come around anymore I would fully understand."

"I ... ah... I don't know what to say," he said blankly.

"It's my life daddy and my choice. I want to be with Owen."

"I didn't see this one coming," he offered.

"We didn't either Uncle Buck. We fell in love. The details don't really matter. My love and my feelings for her are the only thing that matter. I want this woman by my side for the rest of my life."

He sat there in silence as we looked at him. It was a long moment before he spoke.

"How the hell did this happen?"

We sat there and explained. It took about a half an hour to explain everything and try to get him to understand. He was at least civil about it. He just asked questions and made comments and concerns when it was appropriate. By the time we had finished explaining he seemed to understand. Maybe he didn't fully have it sunk in yet. Who knows really? He was calm and composed so that was a good start.