How do you tell your older brother and sister you know they're having sex? There was no good way that I could think of. In many ways it just seemed better to keep it a secret, and for a while that's what I did.
That was until one day when I was headed to my room and accidentally overheard my mother and sister in the middle of a heated argument. I didn't think of myself as particularly nosy most of the time, but I couldn't help stopping to listen. Because we were sisters, my room was right next to Monica's and that made it easy enough to duck out of sight if I thought I might be caught eavesdropping.
Very quickly I caught the gist of the issue which was mom had found out that Monica had been having sex in the house. I didn't know how she'd found that out and I wasn't sure I wanted to. I was hoping it wasn't anything more than an improperly disposed box of condoms or something.
Whatever it had been, mom would of course not realize the true situation and would assume that my sister had been sneaking some unknown boy into her room. Not an unfair assumption, given that it was exactly what my first guess had been too.
Given that our rooms were right next to each other, and that my bed was directly against our shared wall, my first clue about Monica's secret had been the sounds I heard late at night while I supposed to be asleep. Since the real situation hadn't even occurred to me, I too assumed she had a boyfriend over that she didn't want anyone to know about for whatever reason. Unlike mom, I didn't mind all that much and didn't think it was any of my business. It had taken me several weeks to figure out what was actually going on, and then only because I happened to go to the bathroom at just the right time to catch my brother David entering her room on my way back.
Most of the time I wouldn't have interfered in such a dispute, but in this case I knew Monica didn't have a way out since she couldn't very well explain who she was seeing and mom wasn't going to give up on that point easily. It would be better for everyone if the subject was dropped as far as I was concerned.
A little nervously I walked over to the doorway of my sister's bedroom. Both her and mom fell silent immediately as they caught sight of me, not that I expected any different. I may have been eighteen, but to my mother I was still her baby and it wouldn't have surprised me if she hoped I still didn't know what sex was. There was no way she was going to keep up an argument about it with me present.
I played up my best 'I don't want to interrupt' act, fidgeting with my hands and bouncing slightly from foot to foot as I broke the silence.
"Um, I just... I mean I can come back, but I have a biology assignment due tomorrow and Monica said she'd help me with it," I said.
I didn't have any such assignment of course, nor would Monica know anything about it, but she picked up on what I was doing right away. She said absolutely nothing and just looked at mom with a similar expectant expression to my own.
Mom caved easily as I knew she would. She was a sucker for us getting our schoolwork done and it was usually a good excuse for getting out of something more unpleasant, though with my siblings now in university it didn't always work as well for them anymore. They were expected to be more responsible for their own studies.
"Oh, okay sweetie," mom said, still somewhat off-balance from my interruption. "I won't keep you two from it then, it's good to see you working together like that. But," she warned, pointing a finger at Monica, "don't think we aren't going to continue this conversation."
"Yes mom," Monica said, not quite defiantly enough to get in trouble.
My sister followed me out of her room and into mine where she flopped down on my bed and waited until I closed the door.
"Thanks, I owe you," she said.
"No problem. I thought it was better for everyone if she didn't keep interrogating you."
"Enh, I could have handled it. Though I'm thinking she would have started really getting pissed at me soon, so good timing on your part."
"Yeah. It would have been hard getting her to calm down when you couldn't tell her what she wanted to know."
Monica gave me a funny look, like I'd said something confusing. I tried to ignore it as I climbed onto my bed too and sat with my back against the wall.
"So I take it you overheard a lot of that," she ventured.
"Enough of it."
"Well I hope you're less nosy and aren't going to ask who it was," she said, trying to make it a joke and not really succeeding.
"Nah, I already know anyway."
My heart started beating noticeably harder as I spoke. Somehow I'd stumbled onto probably the best opportunity I was going to get to tell Monica I knew about her and David. I was nervous as hell about it though.
My sister looked surprised for a second, then broke into an uneasy smile.
"Listen, whoever you think it is, it isn't. Can we just leave it at that?"
Part of me wanted to just accept that and maintain the status quo, but a bigger part of me didn't want to leave it there. I was still scared of her reaction though and I pulled my knees up to my chest as though it would help protect me somehow.
"Mon, I know okay? You don't have to... I mean it's not really my business, but I wanted you to know. Just please don't try to argue with me on this, I'm not stupid."
Rather than surprised this time, Monica looked absolutely stunned and completely unsure how to handle what I was telling her.
"I know you're not stupid," she said slowly. "You don't need to worry about that. But could you maybe just tell me who it is so we're both definitely on the same page."
"It's David," I said, nodding my head in the general direction of his room so there was no confusion which David I meant.
"Fuck," she said, letting out a long sigh. It was more a statement of resignation than anything else. "How'd you figure that out? He didn't... no, he wouldn't have told you...."
I shook my head. "You're right, he didn't. But we are kind of right next door." I tapped a knuckle on the wall that separated our rooms to illustrate my point.
"Shit, sorry. I didn't think you'd hear us. I really didn't. Though... I know we get louder than we should sometimes."
"It's okay. A lot of the time I don't even notice."
That wasn't quite a lie, but it was close. If I didn't hear them in a given night, it was usually because there was nothing to hear. For some reason I'd found myself staying awake to listen on a not-infrequent basis ever since I became aware of what was happening. It was strangely disappointing when I got nothing but some mild sleep-deprivation out of it.
"It's safer to meet in David's room," Monica said, as if she could read my mind. "We probably should have gone there every time, except he gets impatient waiting for me to join him sometimes. What can you do?" She shrugged. "Anyway, we'll be more careful about that from now on, I'll make sure of it."
"You don't have to," I said a little too quickly. "I... it doesn't bother me is all," I finished almost at a mumble.
Monica looked at me suspiciously for a moment, then slid back on the bed to sit right beside me. I couldn't quite bring myself to meet her gaze.
"Why do I feel like there's something else you want to tell me?" she asked.
I shrugged as if I didn't know what she meant, but not convincingly enough.
"You don't have to worry about it," she said. "You know my biggest secret already, there's nothing you could tell me that you'd need to be scared about."
I still refused to speak and cursed myself mentally for getting stuck in this situation. I'd wanted to tell Monica that I knew about her and David, and I didn't regret that, but there were other things I didn't want her to know.
When I remained silent long enough that Monica decided I wasn't going to say anything, she laid a hand on my shoulder reassuringly and leaned in closer to my ear.
"Do you sometimes listen to us on purpose?" she asked almost at a whisper. "Is that what you aren't telling me?"
I hesitated, then nodded. I was embarrassed that she had guessed, but at the same time at least that meant she wouldn't think it was too weird.
"And you like hearing us?" she prompted.
Again I nodded. There was nothing the least bit upset in the tone of her voice, yet I couldn't help feeling a wave of guilt pass over me. I held my knees a little tighter and did my best not to tremble. I wasn't fooling anyone.
"Aw baby, it's okay," Monica said. She hugged me and stroked my hair gently, trying to get me to relax. "You think I'd get mad at you over something like that? It's not like I haven't been doing worse."
"I know, but... I shouldn't be thinking some of the things that I do."
"You're only thinking them," she reminded me. "I'm actually doing things I shouldn't do. I assume you think about what me and David are doing?"
"Yes," I said reluctantly.
"And it gets you excited?"
"... yes," I said even more reluctantly.
"Well that's not all that surprising given that you're our sister is it? I mean, we're siblings and everything. We're not all that different in a lot of ways."
"I didn't realize it was a genetic thing," I said with a touch of sarcasm.
I actually was starting to feel better, Monica's comforting seemed to be working. It was hard to feel bad when she was holding me.
"I don't know that it's that, but it definitely could be. Or something about how we were raised. Hard to say, no one ever talks about it. No one ever admits to it anyway. Makes it really hard to figure how common fucking your sibling is." I giggled a little at that and Monica released me, presumably having decided I'd be okay. "And seriously, it is nice that we won't have to hide it from you anymore."
"Good, that's what I wanted. We're going to tell David too right?"
"Yep. You can if you want or I will. Or even better we could have some fun with him first."
"What exactly does that mean?"
