I Swore Never Again

"Jennifer?"

Daddy's voice came over the line in a mixture of relief coupled with an edge of concern and worry that was hard to ignore. "Baby girl, I've been trying to get a hold of you for an hour. Why haven't you picked up or at least texted me back?"

"Oh Daddy, I'm so sorry." I offered almost at once knowing I needed to be careful not to betray myself and what I'd done not even two hours before. "Beverly and I had just gotten to talking in the car and you know how she is. I must have muted my phone and I only just thought to check my messages before I called you."

It was a weak, almost flimsy excuse but in truth entirely believable when it came to Beverly. So Daddy didn't think to question me further given that clearly, he had other things on his mind at the moment.

"Speaking of your Mother. She hasn't gotten back yet. Is she still out there with you?"

"No, I don't think so..."

I let the words hang in the air for a moment. "Beverly dropped me off but that's the last I saw of her. I thought she was heading home."

Daddy was silent for a moment more.

"Daddy?" I said in trying not to inject too much concern into my voice. " Daddy if you're worried or you want me to come home early I can grab a ride from Stephanie if you want?"

Daddy was silent for a moment or two longer before finally offering a soft sigh. "No Baby Girl, have fun with your friends. I'll see you when you get home."

"Okay, Daddy."

--

Honestly, after everything that she had done to us over the years, I couldn't believe it when Daddy had decided to not only let Beverly back into our lives but also into our home.

The task of helping Daddy move his home office from the spare room into the Master bedroom fell to me as usual given that Daddy's understanding of computers was limited to looking at a screen and clicking the mouse. All this so that Beverly would be able to stay in the spare room. Not that it really mattered much given that I already knew that no sooner was she back in the house that she and Daddy had started sleeping together again.

My sense of betrayal and anger was nearly overwhelming and It had taken me almost the whole week that followed my Dad's announcement to calm down enough to get my head on straight again. It was only after I was finally able to think straight again that I was finally able to see this for the opportunity that it was.

As I had said before Daddy knew shit about computers and with Beverly's untimely return and the relocation of his home office to the master bedroom. It was simple enough to set up remote access to his laptop and use the built-in webcam and microphone to both see and hear what was going on late at night behind closed doors.

--

Stephanie has been my best friend since almost the first day that Daddy and I moved to Elder Lake and while it was not really a secret the fact remains that she has had a crush on me for almost as long. Elder Lake however is a small community and while she isn't afraid to express those feelings openly. She also isn't too keen on the idea of admitting to those feelings in public either.

It was just before midnight when we finally arrived at my house. Stephanie's lips finding mine in the dark once and then again as her hand rested lightly on my thigh. Her fingers lightly brushing against my sex through the fabric of my shorts.

"Steph!" I objected, groaning softly as I bit my lower lip. My hands reaching so I could touch her cheek as I could look deeply into her eyes. I won't lie, at that moment, I really really wanted things to go further but I was also well aware that tonight, at least, I couldn't let them.

Stephanie gave a soft laugh drawing back just enough to give me some room to breathe.

"I know you want to." She teased as her hand squeezed lightly before moving slowly up my thigh and pressing firmly against my warmth of sex.

" I can't Steph, Not tonight," I spoke softly not wanting to hurt her feelings.

"We're still on for next weekend though right?" She inquired, hopefully glancing away almost afraid that I might have changed my mind.

I kissed her lips again giving a quick nod of my head to dispel her worry. "Of course silly. It's just gonna be you and me and the Lakehouse all next weekend. Just like I promised."

The excitement returning to her expression was easy to see but then again Stephanie had always been easy to read.

"Now get your ass home." I teased her. "Before that Mother of yours gets it into her head that I'm corrupting the morals of her good little girl and calls my Daddy to complain again."

"Step-Mother." Stephanie quickly corrected.

"Step-bitch is more like it." I couldn't help but fire back as I opened the car door to get out.

...

"Daddy, are you still up?" I called pushing through the front door.

The declaration was moot given that I had seen the glow of the television as I had walked up the driveway to the house and yet there was that need to ensure that Daddy was where he was doing those things that I expected him to be doing.

"In here." Daddy called back from the Living room almost on cue. "How was the party Baby Girl?"

Closing the front door behind me I gave an exaggerated sigh before bouncing happily into the Living room pausing just long enough to kiss him lightly on the cheek.

"It was okay I guess, about what you'd expect Daddy. I had Stephanie drive me home before things got too exciting and the Sheriff showed up to break things up."

Daddy gave a nod and a knowing smile as he motioned to the police scanner he had set up on the end table. "Word on the scanner tonight is that there was an accident out on the highway. Rather messy by all accounts so I'd expect he and his boys will be running a little late this evening."

"Well that takes all the fun out of being a juvenile delinquent does it?" I laughed leaning forward just enough to let Daddy get a good look down the front of my sweater before collecting the unfinished beer from his hand and finishing it with a single smooth motion.

Daddy for his part watched in mild amusement as I played at being a naughty girl for him and finished off his beer. Before I offered him my sweetest good little girl smiles. "I'll get you another one Daddy."

There was no need to wait for an answer given that Daddy was a creature of habits. Not a heavy drinker by any stretch, it was Friday night however and I could see that Daddy had already finished off only a couple of beers before I arrived home and thus was unlikely to turn down the offer of another.

Slipping into the kitchen it wasn't hard to miss Daddy's eyes following my ass the whole way I walked past. The whisper of a happy little melody escaped my lips as I sang softly to myself as I collected another of the long-necked bottles from the shelf in the refrigerator. I paused then just long enough to pull the cap off with the bottle opener before taking the paper envelope with the crushed pills from my back pocket and pouring the white powdery remains into the bottle followed by a piece of lime.

--

"Are you sure about this?" Stephanie's brother Ryan stated plainly pulling the small plastic bag from his shirt pocket and offering it to me. His eyes drifting briefly from mine to my breasts and then back again before a lecherous smirk briefly touched his lips. "Honestly Jenny, I would never have guessed you'd be that hard up for a guy."

Stephanie for her part rolled her eyes and shook her head in disbelief. "Honestly Ryan, I cannot believe the shit that comes out of your mouth sometimes."

I took the small plastic bag all but ignoring the looks he was giving me, finding myself staring instead at the dozen or so small white pills he had given me thoughtfully for a moment before speaking. "I've never used a date rape drug before. So how does it work?"

Ryan shrugged all but dragging his gaze away from my breasts again. "Pretty simple really. You just drop the shit into the girl's drink and wait for the pill to dissolve before you hand it back to her. If you're in a real hurry though you can crush the pills and dump the contents into the glass but you have to be extra careful these days. Word is that they're offering these coasters on campus now that the girls can use to test their drinks with. You just drop or two of the fluid onto the surface and it changes colors when it comes in contact with anything other than alcohol. Some guys I know got busted last year."

Stephanie could only shake her head again in disgust. "Ryan so help me God if I even hear about you spiking some girls drink and raping her. I will fucking disown your ass. "

Ryan for his part frowned at his annoyance at his sister flipping her the finger. "Hey, I just sell the shit, I don't use it."

"How long does it take to kick in after they take it?" I ask before the two of them could start in on the exchange of petty insults.

"It depends on who you give it too." Ryan said, offering a shrug. "I've seen it kick in pretty quick with some girls and other times it took about 10 to 15 minutes for heavier girls. Once it takes effect however the shit lasts for hours and most times they don't remember much of anything after the fact."

--

I excused myself for the evening kissing Daddy once more on the cheek before heading upstairs offering the typical excuse of needing to freshen up before bed.

Stephanie's older brother had said the pills didn't take too long to kick in, maybe 10 to 15 minutes at the most, the effects lasting for several hours after the fact. Plenty of time to get myself ready for what I had planned for the evening.

I undressed and showered listening carefully to the sounds from downstairs. Daddy's late-night viewing habits consisted of whatever programming was to be found on the Discovery Channel after midnight on a Friday night or Saturday morning if you preferred.

Slipping quietly from the bathroom into my bedroom. I took a moment to pull my overnight bag from where it was hidden in the back of my closet and placing it on the bed. This is where I kept a majority of what I called my more questionable research materials.

Nothing too exciting mind you but then you might be surprised at how hard it is for a girl in a small town to pick up some things without the aid of a credit card or a college-aged boyfriend willing to go shopping for those little things. That all said I had somehow managed to acquire a few hardcore adult magazines and books as well as an assortment of sex toys of the required size, and the prize of my little collection a set of handcuffs from a wannabe boyfriend 10 years my senior who we will forever refer to as deputy dickhead. (yes the very same) This was also where I had hidden my recently acquired red lace babydoll nighty and matching G-string which I had purchased from one of those online specialty shops as well as a half-full bottle of Gucci I had stolen from Beverly's suitcase.

...

Shocked would perhaps be a bit of an understatement when it comes to describing what I saw that first I was able to spy on Beverly and Daddy together.

I had gone to bed and waited for what had seemed like hours until I, at last, heard those faint familiar sounds coming from Daddy's room. From there it was a simple matter of using my own laptop to remotely access the camera on Daddy's laptop and connect to what amounted to a live feed.

As I said I was shocked at first but putting aside my feelings I was soon viewing things with a critical eye and having to admit to myself that I didn't like what I saw.

To tell the truth, the scene was like something out of a really really bad amateur porn video.

Daddy was just standing in profile in front of the camera with his eyes closed while Beverly was on her knees in front of him. Her hair pulled into a messy ponytail and dressed up in this slutty little red see-through number going down on Daddy like the whore she was. That all being said it only took a minute or two to become aware that she was doing a really poor job of it.

It was painfully obvious almost at once that Beverly wasn't really into oral sex. Her technique appeared to be out and out avoidance coupled with mostly playfully kissing of the swollen head and underside of Daddy's member while she performed what I could only refer to as a glorified handjob. This was all highlighted by Beverly's trademarked inability to shut the fuck up. (Honestly, if Beverly could talk a guy into a climax. I'd bet you good money that that's how she'd do it every time.) I mean not only was it horrible to watch but listening to her drone on and on the though-out the whole encounter was a torment unto itself.

Daddy for his part at least seemed willing to tough it out. His attempts to move things along were thwarted time and again by Beverly. Who would either suddenly backed away or more simply just push his hands away as he tried to heat things up. This was perhaps understandable given that Daddy is surprisingly well endowed and far larger than even I had first thought him to be. (I'm talking 9 or 10 inches at least).

While I won't claim to be an expert on the size of the male member. I was also no virgin and Daddy outsized the vast majority of the boys and young men who had been in competition for the role of my boyfriend over the last several years.

--

The entire session proved to be heartbreaking to watch and consisted of more of Beverly's mouth producing an amazing range of noise. As well as an assortment of colorful and yet pointless comments. All of which proved to be more distracting than beneficial.

At some point, she had somehow managed to talk her way out of performing the blowjob and proceeded into simply laying on her back on the bed. Daddy trying to go at it in a more traditional manner before even he appeared to be frustrated in his attempts to obtain release and finally just grabbed her by her hips and rolled her onto her belly before taking her from behind and by 'taking her' I mean once he had her on her belly he simply rested his large hand on her lower back holding her down and fucked her raw. Beverly burying her face in the bed pillows and issuing an odd assortment of sounds while still somehow managing one colorful remark or comment here and there.

After it was over and they lay in bed together talking it was obvious that Daddy was unsatisfied and clearly disappointed and Beverly ... I swear that I will always remember that smug self-righteous expression she made every time Daddy wasn't looking. It was a look I was very familiar with from that day she had used me to blackmail Daddy. There was no question that she had only slept with Daddy not because she still loved him but because doing so would get her something she wanted.

...

I somehow managed to stomach watching several more of their rather unremarkable love-making sessions learning what I could here and there.

Small details like Daddy's affection for red lingerie. Which was, no doubt, why Beverly had chosen to wear that little red see-through number. (Something that Beverly has clearly known for years given that nearly a full third of her clothing and assorted undergarments consists of red-colored items no doubt intended to catch and hold Daddy's attention both in and out of the bedroom.)

Another being that Beverly's performance in the bedroom never seemed to improve. Beverly had always played at being alluring and seductive but the reality in her case however appeared to be that it was all an act and that she was without question absolute shit in bed. In the words of one of my ex-boyfriends, Beverly is a 'Dead Fuck'.

The problem after the fact was that for all my efforts I could never really tell if she was simply faking being bad or if she really was as bad as she seemed in bed.

The last item was that it became clear to me that Daddy has no trouble in taking what he wants from a woman in bed. I won't go as far as calling him abusive but this discovery was perhaps a little shocking in that it became clear to me that once I started down this path. The way Daddy treated me was no doubt going to change. I could only hope it would be that the change would be for the better.

In the end, though I was left with more questions than answers. The biggest being that even with my own limited sexual experience and knowledge I was certain that I would prove a better partner in bed than Beverly ever would and yet I was forced to wonder what it really was about Beverly that let Daddy take her back into his bed night after night. It couldn't just be Daddy's love for her alone and yet truth be told I didn't have another answer to the question.

--

Personal vanity aside, I'd be the first to admit that I wasn't 'fashion model' material by any stretch of the imagination. That being said, I also wasn't all that hard on the eyes if the opinions of the boys from school were to be trusted. Stephanie had even made it a point to tell me from time to time that I could pass for one of those fitness model types on the internet if I really wanted to.

Truth be told pulling on that red baby doll nightdress and the matching G-string for the first time was kind of a turn on a lot like playing dress-up and I took a moment or two to admire myself in the mirror. That said, how good I looked didn't really matter in this case. I just had to look enough like the original to pass for Beverly in the dark.

Being mother and daughter of course genetics favored me in several areas like eye and hair color. In fact, while I hated to admit it there were several very noticeable similarities between us but thankfully there were also a good number of differences as well.

At eighteen it's no secret that I am far more physically active in both sports and other extracurricular activities than Beverly was at my age. Beverly is also more than twice my age and while she does workout in an attempt to stay fit. The fact remained that she was soft in places and still had a number of bad habits that have started to take their toll on her looks. Then there were my breasts which were a good measure larger than hers and still pretty firm. I also had an ass that was fine as hell if I do say so myself. Something Beverly could never hope to have short of paying for a Brazilian but lift.

All and all though I'd say we were pretty damn close or at least close enough that drugs and denial would win out over clear thinking and that in the end was what I was counting on.

Truthfully, this wasn't the way I had really wanted it to happen the first time with Daddy. As selfishly as it sounds I had really wanted this to happen like one of those romances you see played out again and again on the big screen. I know that's just a silly little girls daydream but that's what I wanted to happen our first time but like I've said before real life doesn't work like it does in the movies.

--

I swear it was in that one moment that Beverly was the happiest I had ever seen her in my entire life.

The mere idea that I had even agreed to spend the whole day in Beverly's company, doing something as mundane as getting my hair and nails done with her, was seemingly almost Biblical in its importance to her.

The very fact that I would even go so far as letting her have them shorten and style my hair in a manner so similar to hers must have seemed to her like some sign. A sign that perhaps there was some small hope that I might find it within myself to accept her into our lives again and that perhaps my suspicions could, at last, be put behind us.

Of course, by this point, I was already well aware of Beverly's true intentions and her plan to use both Daddy and myself again to achieve her goal. A goal that this time I had every intention to stop. Both this time as well as any and all future betrayals she might one day concoct. All it had taken in fact was the simple seed of an idea.

I won't say that Steel Magnolias is one of my favorite movies of all time by any stretch of the imagination. This said, however, if you want to plant the foundation for the idea that the deepest and most meaningful bonding experience a Mother and Daughter can share, is to be found in the simple act of going to the salon together and getting your hair and nails done. Then this, as it happens, is the movie for you.