My husband was out of town on one of his business trips. Jim was out with his girlfriend, Linda. At 19 he is still very shy and very insecure around girls. I was surprised when he began dating her. He and I have been very close. My first husband was very abusive and Jim and I had to hang on to one another. When my husband came home drinking and began to abuse Jim, I would step between them and take the abuse on myself. I am sure that this had a damaging effect on Jim’s image of male/female relationships.
I left my husband one night and took Jim to a shelter. I filed for divorce immediately and got a restraining order against my husband. Jim and I moved into an apartment with the help of some very nice people. We struggled economically until I met my current husband. He is 15 yrs older than I am, but he accepted Jim as a son. Jim was 18 at the time and it was hard to find a man that was willing to take on the responsibility of a young son. Bob volunteered to pay Jim's tuition to the local college if he kept his grades at B or above. He could live here with us to save boarding costs. We were married almost immediately. I have to admit that my motives were not the best, but I have tried to be a good wife. Bob was widowed and lonely and was looking for a companion. His sexual needs are not equal to mine and he really has never been able to satisfy me, although I am a pretty good actress.
This particular night, I was reclining on the couch reading an erotic story while waiting for Jim to come home. I never go to bed with seeing him safely home. I was wearing a rather revealing nightie and robe. When Jim came in early from his date, I could tell that he was very upset. I asked him what was wrong. He told me that Linda had just told him that she was seeing some else and thought it would be better if they didn’t see one another any more. He was devastated. He sat and cried on my shoulder as I held him in my arms stroking him on the back. He said that he would never have a girl friend because they didn’t find him attractive. (He is a very nice looking young man and has a good body.) I tried to reassure him and told him that any girl would be lucky to have him. I have to admit that I had lusted after him, myself, but knew it was wrong.