I Hate Change

I push my foot into the hose. Then unroll them up my leg past my knee. After repeating the process on the other foot, I stand up and pull them the rest of the way up.

It's the first time I've worn pantyhose, but there is a reason for that. Up until 3 months ago, I was a guy. Now I'm finally over my anger and grief and I'm ready to live my life, and possibly get some revenge.

So, who am I, and how did I get in this situation? Let's start with the easy stuff. My name is Samit, although I've been going by Sam the last 3 months. I'm 24 years old and originally from Thailand. My mother married an American when I was 5, and we moved here in the southwest US. I have a sister that is 3 years older than me.

As for what happened to me, that is a bit of a story. After genetic screening successfully eliminated most diseases and defects in newborns back in the mid 2020's, it gave rise to not just screening for diseases, but selecting the best sperm and eggs for the baby.

Parents could choose gender, physical traits as well as other characteristics out of the millions of sperm and a dozen or so eggs that could be harvested from the hosts, usually themselves.

By 2030, designer babies was a reality. This gave way to more advanced genetic engineering around 2036 where all those traits could be easily changed even after the baby was born. A simple liquid was injected into the baby with the pre-programmed characteristics, and within a couple days, the baby was changed into the desired characteristics.

It only took a couple more years to perfect making that available to all people, regardless of age. The only catch is that it's a one-shot deal, and can't be reversed. It literally changes your DNA and locks it in.

For my college graduation, my mother and step-father gifted me my choice of treatments. I agonized over the decision. I was 5 feet 8 inches tall and very slim. I wanted to be taller, more muscular, get my vision corrected, and of course, be better endowed.

I went back and forth for weeks, trying to decide if there was anything else I wanted to change. Finally, 3 months ago, I pulled the trigger. I picked up my order and injected the serum on a Friday night after work.

The serum puts you to sleep as the changes occur, as it would be very painful otherwise. I woke up Sunday to find everything had gone wrong.

Not only was I not taller or more muscular, I wasn't even the right gender. My reaction was exactly what you would expect. Panic, anger, fear and depression. I was all over the place. Calling it an epic meltdown would not be untrue.

I got it together and called the hotline for the lab that produces the serum. They checked my order 3 times, by 3 different people all saying it was correct when I received it. At my insistence, they sent a courier down to collect the empty vial so they could test the residue in it.

I was embarrassed when the courier showed up to get the vial. I put on a thick sweater and a bathrobe, but still felt myself blush when he looked at me. All he saw was a woman.

All I had to do after that was wait. Thankfully, everything is delivered right to my door that I could need. I don't know about all the stages of grief, but I definitely went back and forth between anger and depression.

It took the lab 3 days to confirm the residue in the vial was correct. So, either they are lying or something else happened.

It took me 11 more weeks to work through my anger and depression. Luckily, my accounting job is remote. Other than the initial interviews and on-boarding process, I didn't have to go into the office. At least work kept me distracted some of the time.

It came down to a decision for me. Get a lawyer, sue the lab and have the whole world know my unfortunate circumstances, or accept that it could not be changed, and my anonymity is not worth a lawsuit I probably wouldn't win for damages I couldn't necessarily prove anyway.

After all, the treatment I had received wasn't punitive in nature. I hadn't been transformed into a hideous monster. The person I saw in the mirror would probably be classified as attractive, even in today's world of imperfection-free bioengineered people.

I was still healthy and safe. Maybe the unintended gender change could be used to establish damages, but would it be worth being known everywhere I went? I'd never have a normal life again.

No, the person I had become was pretty. I just didn't feel like it was me looking back at her in the mirror. I had retained my original height of 5 feet 8 inches, and the slimness I had before, but there was no denying the womanly parts were there, and definitely above average. She looked every bit of a beautiful woman.

Maybe if I cut my now long hair, it would make me look less feminine? I considered it, but it would be cutting my own nose off to spite my face. I would be weird looking. My only path to happiness was accept. I didn't like it, but I had to accept the facts. I'm female now, with all the parts. Right down to my DNA.

I had raged and sulked for 11 weeks. I was entitled to that. Any sane person would have done the same. But now is where I choose my path, and as much as I was unhappy about what had happened to me, not even the president could undo it now. If I let it ruin my life, who ever did this to me would keep on winning.

Which made me start thinking of all the ways someone could have done this to me. I had three possibilities. First, someone at the lab. They would have to be high enough up to change records and cover up the deception.

Second, something could have happened between the lab and my apartment. I don't remember anything like that occurring, but it was possible.

Finally, someone could have gotten to me here, in my apartment. Probably the most likely scenario. After I went to sleep, I would have been vulnerable.

Which brings up the less simple question of why. Who hated me enough to do this to me, and what would they gain from it? They had to be some kind of sick to think this was funny or an appropriate payback. I had more questions than answers, but I was done feeling sorry for myself.

I needed a plan. A goal to achieve. I was still working on that, but I needed to be able to function in the mean time. I wasn't going to find the answers in my apartment, so I needed to be able to go out into the world.

As much as it embarrassed me, I needed some expert help. My older sister Dao and I have always gotten along reasonably well, so I text her and asked her to come over.

Naturally, when I let her in, she asked where Samit was and who I am. I got her to sit on the couch, and showed her the messages back and forth between me and the lab that gave me the serum.

She read through the exchange then looked hard at me. I had originally lied to her and our parents about the results of my treatment. I had told them it had done well, so I needed to let her work it out.

"Holy fuck!" she gasped when the realization hit her. "It really is you!"

There was a lot of questions, many I didn't have the answers to. She went through the same process I had been through - disbelief, anger and finally acceptance. Since she was less emotionally invested as I am, she got through it much quicker.

Finally, we arrived at the purpose why I asked her over. I needed her help. "No matter how mad or depressed I am, nothing can change me back now. Everyone knows the results are permanent, as you know from your own experience with the serum." I started. Dao has her treatment 4 years ago.

"So, I can continue to wallow in my own sadness, feeling sorry for myself, or I can get over it and get on living life. And today, I've chosen to start finding a way to be happy again."

"That's great Samit." Dao said. "I'm glad you chose that, and are sharing it with me."

"Thank you Dao." I replied. "But I asked you here for a reason. I know this is awkward, but I have no idea where to begin."

"Ah, I see now." She smiled at me. "You need big sister's help."

I confirmed that, and she got up from the couch, walking over to me.

"Let's see what we are dealing with." She motioned to me, indicating she wanted me to remove my shirt and pants.

"It's nothing I haven't seen before." She tried to ease my nerves. "Women get undressed in front of each other all the time. You need to get use to it."

So I got down to my boxers and an undershirt, and she measured my waist with a tape measure. "25 inches, very nice. You are the same waist as me."

"Why did you need to know that?" I asked.

"Women's underwear comes in many sizes. Not just small, medium or large. You are an underwear size 4. I figured it would be better to determine that in private than in a store." She explained.

"As for a bra, it's better to get measured in a store, as if you don't get it exactly right, it can be very uncomfortable. Getting you proper underwear will be our first priority. "

Then we went to a store. First, we stopped and I got fitted for a bra. Thankfully the woman was very professional and quick. I'm a 31D. Armed with that knowledge, Dao took me out and showed me bras.

She suggested getting some basic ones, and some sports bras for exercise. Then she took me to the sexy ones.

"I know you aren't ready, but at some point, you are going to need these." She tried to be soft saying it. "Trust me, you will need at least one in black, white and beige."

Somehow, she talked me into it. Then came the hard part - panties.

"Your instinct will be to go for the full ones, but you will come to regret it." She explained. "Why don't you get a few of each, and figure out which kind you like before you buy a bunch? You might be surprised which ones you end up liking."

I didn't call her to not listen to her, so I took her advice. I picked 3 different kinds, then she threw a t-back and a g-string one in my cart for me to try. I didn't object.

While I could wear most of my old clothes, Dao suggested a few pieces of women's clothes to wear when I went out. Jeans and some leggings, with some women's blouses, but nothing overtly sexy or super feminine.

"You will have to trust me on this one sis." She used her new nickname for me I guess. "Get one formal outfit, in case something unexpected comes up."

She steered me to a skirt, saying I needed to understand that it is normal for women to wear a skirt, and I would eventually need one. She paired it with a white button up shirt that looks like a woman's version of the normal men's dress shirt.

She said I should wear a camisole under it, with a few buttons undone. So she got me one.

"Oh, and you should wear pantyhose with it." Tossing a cardboard envelope containing one pair in my cart.

I argued a little with her, but she said I needed to trust her judgment. It looked very professional.

"You will get use to dressing like a woman soon, and it won't be a big deal." She explained. "Trust me, I'm doing what's best for you in the long run."

I had to get all new shoes, as my feet were smaller than before. I guess it was fortunate that I am the same size foot as Dao now. She bought me a basic collection, including a couple of pairs of heels, but said I could supplement out of her closet too.

There was so much to get. All new shampoo and soap. Hair care products. Feminine products. Makeup and perfume. It just went on and on.

I was tired and felt like I had run a marathon, but Dao was enjoying it.

"I always wondered what it would be like to have a sister. Now I guess I know." She said, only half teasing me.

"We have one more thing to get." She advised me as we pulled up in front of a sex toy shop. "Wait here."

She jumped out of the car even though I was telling her not to. 5 minutes later, she came out holding one small bag.

"Trust me on this, you need this badly." She sneered, laughing a little at me.

Inside the bag was a "Hands-free, g-spot vibrator."

"Trust me sis, that is going to blow your mind. Every woman needs one of these." She teased.

I protested, but was too embarrassed to return it, so I kept it.

Dao gave me lessons on makeup and fixing my hair. This continued even after that night, which I was grateful for. After I was more comfortable with myself, I broke the news to my mother and step-father.

At first they apologized, feeling responsible since they gave the treatment to me as a gift. It took some time, but I convinced them it was not their fault. I told them I was going to figure out who did this to me.

Which puts us back where we started. I was dressing in the formal clothes because I had a job interview at MegaLab, the company that makes the genetically altering serum. I didn't quit my regular job, as I was only there to find out the truth, then I would quit. I would just do my regular job at night. It would be exhausting, but temporary.

I needed answers so I could move on. Their advertisement for an account was too good of an opportunity to pass up. I needed access to their records. Because my treatment was a gift from my parents, my name would not alert anyone to the problem I had experienced.

The downside is working 2 jobs and having to go into an office every day. My desire for answers outweighed my inconvenience at having to function as a woman in public for a while. While I had accepted the fact that I am female now, I still felt like I was pretending.

So, I finish getting dressed. I put on the skirt Dao bought me, then the camisole and the button up blouse. Finally the modest heels I got for just such an occasion.

I arrived for my interview 10 minutes early. I waited in the lobby, crossing my legs in the skirt like Dao showed me to. Not at all uncomfortable since I no longer have the "equipment" in the way.

A woman came out and introduced herself as Amanda, the H.R. specialist who was in charge of filling the accounting position. She took me back into the offices to a conference room and soon we were joined by the CFO, another accountant and the H.R. Manager.

It was 3 hours of the normal interview stuff. My only discomfort was the discomfort I feel in this body, not like it was my own yet.

It was tiresome, but I understand their thoroughness. After that part of the interview was over, I was given a tour. While there was only one section that was "off limits" for me, it was actually a very impressive facility, with redundant safety checks and a continuous cleaning crew.

With that task put of the way, I went home and ordered some delivery food. I had enough social interaction for one day.

Dao called me that night and asked how it went. I told her it was actually a very impressive facility, and I think the interview went well.

"That's great sis." She replied. "You seem to be adjusting well. Be sure to give mom a call, ok?"

I thanked her and told her I would indeed give Mom a call. Our mother was still a little embarrassed, but getting use to the sound of my new voice. She still apologizes for the mix-up.

I caught up on my work and got into bed later than usual. I was woken up by an alert telling me I had a message. I opened it up and found that MegaLab had sent me a document package.

It consisted of the benefits guide and an offer letter. Much to my surprise it was 30% more than my current job pays. I guess they liked me more than I realized.

That was the first time the possibility of MegaLab as my only job came to mind. I decided that I should be careful and not do anything to jeopardize the long-term potential there, just in case it did end up being as good as it looked on first view.

The next day, I sent a counter offer in that only requested an additional week personal time off. No harm in asking, right?

Very quickly I got an updated offer letter with the additional leave. Wow, I was starting to get impressed. They had great benefits, a great salary and now extra vacation.

The only question was, how soon could I start. I told them the standard 2 weeks, and by that afternoon I had an on boarding plan and schedule in my inbox.

Feeling better than I had since the serum mix-up, my curiosity got the better of me, and I got the vibrator out that my sister pushed me into getting. Not really sure how girls go about masturbating, I just stuck to the normal routine I had used before. I pulled up some porn, looking specifically at lesbian porn this time, and sat down at my desk.

It only took a few minutes before I felt aroused. Funny how the underlying feeling is the same, even if I didn't have a dick to get hard any longer, I still had the same feeling of arousal. Lesbian is a term I guess I'm going to have to get use to.

I touched my vagina and felt my own wetness, and went ahead and picked up the vibrator. It has one end that is bigger, about an inch or two in diameter, with a weird shape that became a more narrow tube leading out of the big end.

The smaller tube had a curved end, finishing in a small, flat piece. I turned it on and inserted the bigger end into my vagina. It's shape pulled it to the appropriate position inside me, and the small, flat piece came to rest against my clit.

Immediately I felt the stimulation of the vibrations inside me and against my clit. Holy shit! Within 3 minutes, I was panting and felt my stomach muscles seizing as I approached my first orgasm as a female.

After 10 minutes, and 2 really big orgasms, I had to pull it out of me as I could not take the stimulation anymore. My entire body had become ultra sensitized. Dao was right. It was amazing!

The next day I told Dao my job news by text, to which she replied, "we need to go shopping". I hadn't thought that far ahead, but Dao was right. I did need work clothes.

And wow, did we shop. We must have visited 8 stores over 2 days building me a professional wardrobe. It was about half pants and half skirts/dresses. Dao hadn't steered me wrong yet, so I listened to her, even when she pushed me towards getting some miniskirts. Also more shoes, underwear and pantyhose.

I had never been more nervous than my first day of work at MegaLab. I wasn't nervous about the job. Accounting is as boring and straight forward as it gets, but it is dependable. I like dependable. I don't like change, and frankly I had more change lately than I could stand, but I had a mission.

What made me nervous was having to function in public as a woman. Getting use to how women interact with each other. Getting judged by other women and men. Getting accustomed to the looks from guys especially. The obvious flirtatious banter. Just normal every day life, but from the other side.

The first 3 days were easy. Just general training. A lot on safety procedures. Then I was assigned to another accountant. His name is Don, and he's a total creep. He spent half his time trying to look down my shirt. Gives me chills that I had displayed even a hint of that behavior in the past too.

I eventually stopped worrying about it. If he sees, then he sees. Lunch was is a giant cafeteria. I was just exiting the line when a woman ran up and grabbed me, pulling me to her table.

"You're the new accountant, right?" she asked.

I introduced myself as Sam, and she invited me to sit with her group. Her name is Kathy, and she also is an accountant, working in accounts payable.

Among the group was one of the scientists. A young guy named Gary. I noticed him because he noticed me. It was weird to see it from the receiving end. It was very apparent that he liked my appearance. Maybe I could use him to get some insight into the process, so that I can figure out if something went wrong with my serum.

Mostly Kathy talked about the accounting department. She said the part I was thinking out loud - Don is a creep who thinks he's God's gift to women. I guess it was my first gossip session as a woman.

The next day I was switched to Kathy. My boss, the CFO Aaron, told me I would spend a day with each of the accountants to see what they did.