I was fixing Brandi's ceiling fan when Aunt Ruby walked in, smoking a cigarette.
"Hey Gunner, Brandi just showed up with bags and bags of new clothes. When I asked how she paid for it, Brandi said she got the fucking cash from you."
"Fucking cash? Oh yes, I uh... loaned her the money." Dammit! I couldn't believe Brandi's stupidity. Bringing home a bunch of new clothes was bound to make Aunt Ruby curious.
"Hmm... exactly what did Brandi have to do to get the cash?"
"Do? Uh, nothing." I grinned like an idiot, and I could tell auntie didn't believe me. Aunt Ruby's eyes widened, and I got ready for the chainsaw.
But my aunt just laughed. "Oh. My. Fucking. God."
"You're not angry, Auntie? I thought you'd be ballistic."
"No, I'm happy, but... Before you bang your cousin again, there's something you should know." Auntie whispered in my ear. "Me and my brother, your father, used to get naked and tickle each other under the sheets.
"Aunt Ruby, I don't want to hear this."
"Yes you do. Because that's how we accidentally made Brandi..."
"WHAT-THE-HELL!?" I felt nauseous. "So my father is... her father too?"
"Yep. Brandi's your cousin AND your sister."
My heart stopped. "Auntie leaned closer. "Your dad and I used to hump like horny bunnies. Just like you and your sister do. Remember that next time you bang your sister's twat."
"There won't be a next time. I can't afford what Brandi charges."
"Charges? Just how much does that bitch charge you?"
"I paid her three bills last night."
"Wow Gunner! I'll pay you three bills to bang me!"
"That sounds weird auntie."
"No it don't. We be from Oklahoma, where sex is a family affair. Family First." Auntie laughed. "In fact, my mother is also my sister."
"Auntie, I REALLY don't want to hear this!"
"Gunner, maybe you and me should have an old-fashioned family fuck?" Auntie leaned back, shaking her jumbo tits. "After all, you are my favorite nephew. My favorite FUCKING nephew."
She licked my ear, and my loins twitched.
Aunt Ruby was older but still attractive and sexy as sin... My prick grew so hard it could punch holes in steel. Auntie noticed my lump. "Oh, I see the handyman has a hammer. Does he know how to use it?"
"Yep Auntie. I'm gonna nail you to the wall."
"Oh Gunner, you're just like your father. But the bed would be better."