Part 5: The Arrangement
It's Monday morning and I call Jimmy Bates, he's a realtor, married, has a son, a daughter and one on the way. So, I didn't have to ask about a fertility problem, or make up a phony excuse to see him. I just set-up a business lunch date, then jot down the three addresses, and information mom knew about the properties.
I meet Jimmy and he looks almost exactly like he did when I saw him last, four years ago. When we were little kids he was the biggest for his age, but he stopped growing three or four years before the rest of us did, and I thought he would always get another spurt, but he didn't. He hugs me and holds my chair out for me.
Ask if he has pictures of his family, and he happily shows them to me. Jimmy is five-seven, lean, decent looking, like me heavily freckled with hazel eyes, but he has red hair. His wife is a brunette, which might be dyed, and his babies have red hair, but their mother's darker complexion. Kids are cute and I try to picture mine with him being the father. I could see the resemblance they had of their father, and those of their mother, trying to adjust my features to the pictures in my mind.
After a bit of small talk he asks, "What can I do for you?"
Tell him I'm moving, wish to sell the properties and if his company wants to handle the listings. He laughs correcting me, "I'm a little monkey in the company zoo, it's my in-law's business, but I'd be more than happy to list them. Where are you moving to?" He grins, looking at my ring finger. "Are you getting married, or something, soon?"
I hem and haw, getting him to apologize and get all red-faced. Feel so bad I tell him my rough plans, and he listens intently. He waits for our waiter to give us our meal then leans closer. "Wasn't trying to pry, Jamie I swear, just the way everything is set-up I can punch in what you're looking for in the computer and get you some listings."
Tell him what we're doing, and what we're after. He holds up a finger. "I'm not trying to be rude, but the more I know the better I can help you. When you say partner, it isn't business wise?"
"It is, but I'm gay too."
He grins and nods. "Makes me feel a little better." I wrinkle my nose, and he laughs. "We were young, but I had such a serious crush on you, and I knew you liked me, but never quite the way I wanted." He holds up his hands. "Not that there is anything wrong with your preferences, it's just... Well, this is funny in a way, see I bought every pick-up book I could find and read them faithfully, but nothing worked. Took me two years to ask anyone else out after I gave up on you."
He laughs, then waves his hand back and forth. "Sorry, it certainly isn't funny to you, and you probably had a rough time trying to figure it all out. It's good to see you, and I'll help you with anything I can."
"Now that you mention it, Jimmy," I smile, "Jan, my partner, and I have another minor little problem. We'd like to have babies," his eyes get big, and his beer goes down the wrong way, "and we could use a donor."
"Ah, Jamie," he wipes off his chin, "we're talking sperm here, right?"
"Yes, but that would be where it ends. No support or anything, if you wish to stay in contact that would be fine. If you want no contact, that's fine too."
"Wow, ah, wow."
We sit there a bit, not saying anything. "Is that a good wow, Jimmy, or a bad wow?" I motion to our waiter for two more beers. "It'll be all up front, and we could talk to your wife–"
"No, can't do that," Jimmy nearly shouts, then calms down. "Sorry, she just knows about you being my best friend, and thinks there was more. Plus I have my in-laws to worry about, they think everyone is out to get them. They'd have a shit fit over other potential heirs to the family business. Ah, for now it was just a wow, a big wow."
"Understand, not a problem, and don't worry, listings are still yours. Now, lets enjoy this fine meal, and let you think about it some. So how is the real estate business doing? You think we should hold off selling?"
"Whew, loaded question Jamie," Jimmy shrugs, "we have decent areas around town, at this time more bad, but there are some good, and it depends on the property. Naturally, for me to make a commission I'd have to tell you to sell, so I'm more than a tad biased." He sips at his beer. "Still, I don't see any real sharp upswing appearing in the next five years. Your grandpa's property, folks around there have been quartering those lots, and doing pretty good. I know a few contractors who might be interested."
"Great, at least I get a little good news."
Poor Jimmy is so shook up he can't eat, but he doesn't have a problem with the beer. I order him another. He looks at me and sighs. "You know you were my dream girl?" Before I can reply he adds, "Alright, I'll do it. So, what do we do, have clinical sex?"
"Actually, we were just going to inject the sperm with a baste–"
"Doesn't work," he shakes his head, "one of those urban myths. If you want to try, fine by me, but I don't want to be jacking off for–" Jimmy put a finger to his lips. "Sorry, that was crude. You can have it done at a clinic, I could donate there and–"
"No, that's not an option. There has to be another way."
Chuckling he raises his beer. "There's the old-fashioned way, it works pretty good."
Sipping on my beer I weigh my options, no matter who we choose this is going to be a problem. "So, for the sake of argument, you would be alright with it? I mean, the old-fashion way."
"Jamie, I told you, you're my dream girl. Yes, I'd be okay with it, and would keep it as professional as possible." He snorts. "Course, I don't know the exact etiquette, do you try to achieve an orgasm, or just contraception."
I wrinkle my nose. "My thinking would be, try to make it pleasurable, so you would be in a more conducive state. Light kissing, breasts are in, heavy kissing, bottom and clit are out." Jimmy nods, and I hold up two fingers. "Other problems, one I don't shave, two my partner wants to be there at conception, means a lot to her."
"Wow, ah, wow." He scratches his head, and closes one eye. "So, are we talking you don't do the new Brazilian cut some girls do?"
"No, I'm talking I don't own a razor." I giggle. "I'm not bigfoot, but if you're curious take a peek under the table."
He drops his fork, then looks under the table. "Can I feel?"
"Yes."
"Well, that's not bad, light color and soft. I don't see–"
"Jimmy, can we please carry on the conversation above the table?"
"Oh, sorry, Jamie." He snickers, and I think he's got a buzz on. "Kinda saying that in bunches, this just threw me a bit. So, is your partner... ah, well, going to be trouble? I mean–"
"Jan is quite nice, just everyday people, I'm the dyke."
"Oh, you are? Really!" Jimmy turns a bit red. "Well, ah, I guess..."
"Not to worry I'm not a bull dyke, but in my circles I would be the dyke."
"You look great, Jamie." He snickers. "Not that I could tell you what a bull dyke, or regular dyke looks like. How are we doing on time, concerning the event?"
