It was Valentine's Day four years ago when my family was shattered. I was sixteen and ready to go out on a date when the sheriff deputy pulled into our driveway. He had a serious demeanor when he asked if my mother was home. I told him apprehensively that I would get her.
Mom had burst out in tears, appearing to know what the deputy was about to tell her.
"Some hikers found him," he told Mom solemnly. "There was this card in his pocket addressed to you." It was in a red envelope, typical of a Valentine's Day card.
Mom took the card out from the envelope, opened it and went into shock, it slipped from her fingers. I bent down to retrieve it from the floor. I felt compelled to read it.
'I'm sorry but it must end this way. I'm sorry I am no longer the husband you deserve. Good-bye my Valentine.'
The deputy tried to console my mother when my sister Nicole came out of her room. She was dressed for her Valentine's Day date, screaming sexy red dress, like she was ready for a fun evening. She stopped when she saw the deputy and my mother crying, a worried look came over her face. I went to her with the card still in my hand.
"Dad killed himself," I informed my sister. "Some hikers found him in the desert." I showed her the Valentine's Day card our father left for our mother. Nicole read it, her jaw dropped open.
The sheriff deputy told Mom she would need to go and identify the body. He would drive her to the morgue. I took out my phone and cancelled my date. I told the deputy that I would drive. Nicole's date had arrived and when she told him the situation he left.
"I will go with you," Nicole told Mom. "Let me change first," she said.
Since then, Valentine's Day has become a somber day of remembrance and regret. Nicole broke up with her boyfriend and I never seemed to be able to have a lasting relationship with any of the girls I dated. Lisa, the girl I was going to take out that evening tried to come on to me several times but I just couldn't connect anymore. It was almost as if we were cursed.
A couple of years ago we were sitting at the dinner table with Mom on Valentine's Day when Nicole revealed the plans she had with her boyfriend that fateful evening.
"Billy had reserved a room at the hotel where we were going for a romantic dinner," she relayed to us. "I was going to lose my virginity that night. I was so ready."
"Are you still a virgin?" I asked out of curiosity.
"I popped my cherry with a dildo so I wouldn't be embarrassed if I ever did have sex with a guy," she confessed. "But, yea, I guess I am still a virgin."
"What about you Eric? You don't seem to hang with anyone long enough to get that far," my sister inquired into my relationships.
"I got pretty far with Lisa but not all the way," I confessed.
Last year when Mom asked why I couldn't seem to hold on to a relationship I told her and Nicole about my last man to man talk with Dad.
"Dad told me about his problem," I started. "He said he couldn't get an erection anymore with you, Mom," I said not wanting her to feel bad but it was the truth. "He said he was fine getting hard and masturbating," I remembered. "was there a problem between you and Dad?"
"It was my fault," Mom confessed. "A few months before your father caught me, uh, in bed with someone else."
"What! You were sleeping with someone else?" Nicole blurted out astonished. "Who was he?" she demanded.
"It wasn't a he," Mom responded. "You remember Karen who lived across the street?"
"Oh yea," I recalled. "She moved away right after Dad killed himself," I said trying to put the situation with my mother in perspective.
"Well, Karen and I were, I don't want to say lovers because we were not in love," Mom explained. "We just enjoyed having sex with each other, pleasuring each other, having orgasms. It was sexual pleasure I didn't get from your father."
"Did Dad ever get you to reach an orgasm?" Nicole asked Mom. "I mean, I can get myself off rubbing my clit but I never could just riding a dildo. I don't know if a real dick could do the job."
"No. Your father never got me off," Mom told us. "We were never good in bed. He would just cum in a couple of minutes and then fall asleep. I was never satisfied."
"Do you think that's why he killed himself?" Nicole conjectured. "Because he felt impotent and couldn't please you."
"Maybe," Mom sighed.
We let the conversation die and sat in silence.
A couple of weeks ago Mom told us she had rented a cabin on Mt. Lemmon for the Valentine's Day weekend. She told me I could skip my Friday classes that day and she asked Nicole to take the day off work so we could spend a three day weekend away as a family.
"Look," Mom said to us. "We have to break this Valentine's curse. No more sitting around regretting and blaming and despairing over what happened four years ago. We are going to have fun this year. Maybe there will be some snow left and we can go skiing."
We had a few winter storms that left snow on the mountains above six thousand feet. I was actually looking forward to it hoping to go skiing again. Growing up Dad had taken us on yearly skiing vacations to Colorado.
As Valentine's Day approached it became obvious that all the snow had melted on the mountain, the weather had been hotter this year with days over eighty degrees here in the desert valley. Still, the change in environment was welcoming.
We drove up late that Friday morning stopping for lunch before getting to the cabin.
"Would anyone like some of our famous pie?" the server asked as we finished eating our lunch.
"Definitely," Nicole chirped.
"You better watch it," Mom teased Nicole. "You're getting a little chubby girl."
"Mom," Nicole responded. "That's not fair."
"Mom's right," I chimed in making digs at my sister. "That pie looks like it's going straight to your butt." Actually I thought Nicole had a sexy round butt, perfectly complimenting her round large breasts.
"Alright, have some pie," Mom laughed.
We arrived at the cabin and unpacked the car. It was a two bedroom cabin with a living room and small kitchen. Mom had brought some food to cook so we didn't need to eat out considering there was only the one restaurant in the small village. I also noticed she brought several bottles of wine, reds and whites.
The weather was nice, temperatures in the fifties, though we knew it would get colder when the sun went down. The cabin came with plenty of firewood so all we needed was to collect some small kindling to get the fire going.
Mom baked a pan of lasagna for dinner. Afterward we went to the living room continuing to drink the red wine we started at dinner.
"Eric, Nicole," Mom started out to tell us something. "Last year on Valentine's Day we had some very depressing conversation if you remember."
Nicole and I nodded yes. How could we not remember? We were still trying to come to terms with Dad's suicide and how it affected each of us.
"I've thought about a lot of things afterwards," Mom went on. "The one thing that bothered me the most was that the two of you are not having healthy relationships. You both seem to be avoiding them. And mostly you are avoiding healthy sexual relationships."
Nicole and I looked at each other. I knew Mom was right. Nicole hadn't dated since she broke up with her boyfriend four years ago on the night she planned to lose her virginity.
"You're afraid to get close with a woman," Mom said to me directly. "Afraid you will be like your father and not be able to please her." I was embarrassed she was so spot on. "And you, Nicole. You were all worked up, ready to lose your virginity when your life was shattered. You need to recover," she admonished my sister.
"We are going to overcome our fears, our inhibitions, perceived inadequacies. We are going to be open and loving with each other as we do so as a family," Mom told us. "And we are going to have fun."
Mom threw some large pillows and cushions on the floor in front of the fireplace. She directed us to sit in a circle. Then she took a deck of cards and began to shuffle them.
"Strip poker, Texas hold-em," Mom said gleefully. "I think we all have beautiful bodies and we shouldn't be afraid to show them off and be comfortable in our own skin. So, the loser with the lowest hand has to shed an article of clothing."
We had played poker as a family for entertainment. I learned from my father who was very good and even successful at the Casino on the Reservation. Nicole was pretty easy to beat but Mom was the worst.
"Don't be nervous," Mom said as she dealt the first hand. "I've seen you staring at your sister's tits," she chided me. True to form, Mom lost the first round and instead of taking off her shoes to start she pulled her sweater off over her head revealing her mature large natural breasts held up by a white lace bra.
After a half hour or so of playing poker both Mom and Nicole were down to their underwear, bra and panties, while I still donned my pants, boxers and t-shirt. Mom was the first to lose her bra. She teasingly cupped her tits and brought each nipple to her mouth and licked them.
"You better not play so good," Mom teased me as I stared at her luscious breasts. "Your erection is going to get painful confined in those pants," she chuckled. She was right though, it was getting painful.
Nicole lost the next round and let her boobs out of the confines of her bra.
"Very nice," Mom said leaning over to feel the firmness of Nicole's round tits. "What do you think?" Mom asked me grabbing my hand and placing on my sister's breast. Nicole's nipples stood out, hard, as my fingers brushed across them.
Mom sat back down and I noticed she slid her hand in her panties. She pulled her hand back out and licked her fingers.
"Oh my god, Mom," Nicole called out. "You're making me wet."
This was too much for me. My cock was hard pressing against my balls. Nicole dealt the next hand. I purposely traded in a pair of jacks hoping to get nothing in return so I would lose. To my relief I had the nothing to show. I stood up, unbuttoned my pants and pulled the zipper down. Mom was right there helping me out of them and running her hand along my stiff rod under the thin fabric of my boxer shorts.
"Feel how hard he is," Mom said to Nicole coaxing her to come feel my cock.
"Oh my god, he is like a steel rod," my sister said.
I lost the next hand as well but not on purpose. I dealt myself a lousy hand and got nothing on the draw. I pulled my boxers off leaving my cock on full display.
"Oh, it's so big and fat," my sister cooed.
