I fumbled with the keys to open the door, my right hand on the luggage handle. I was still in my flight attendant uniform, high heels, medium cut skirt and a scarf around my neck with the airline colors. I was tired and ready to relax on the couch with drink.
I hadn't seen my 18 year old son in two days, and I wanted to make sure he was ok. But I also remembered so many other returns home when I had my husband waiting for me, but not any more. The loneliness had been hanging on me for a long time. I finally got the key in the door and walked into our apartment. "Honey? Are you home?"
"Hi Mom!" He seemed excited to see me, which was refreshing. He walked slowly toward me to give me a hug. This was a recent development, I think it came from all the TV shows with people hugging each other. He wrapped his arms around me, giving me a big kiss, catching a little lip, while his hands dropped reaching the top of my butt. The hugs had become more affectionate each time I came home, but I enjoyed the extra attention.
"Brian, could you make me a drink and bring over the ash tray? I am exhausted."
"Sure, sit down and relax." I looked at myself in the mirror. For forty-four I still looked great. I had the hourglass figure, my breasts were large and still firm. My hair still looked good after the long flight, held up in a bun. With that thought I went towards the couch remembering that young steward who had been chatting me up the night before in the hotel bar. "I should have slept with him." I thought. He was only 28, but very handsome. It felt good to have a young man attracted to me, even though he was only looking for a one night stand.
I sat on the couch and crossed my legs, showing a bit of thigh under a dark stocking. Brian handed me the drink and sat down next to me. Putting his head on my shoulder while I leaned back. The whiskey felt good and so did my son's affectionate. We talked about our days and he freshened up my drink. While he was up a lit a cigarette. When he sat down again he now laid his head lower, his chin touching my breast. It made me a little uncomfortable, but it also reminded me of the night I missed with the steward. I sat up and put out the cigarette, took a sip of my drink then leaned back again. He put his head back on my chest, farther down on my breast. The alcohol was taking effect, and I began to feel good, comfortable with my son's affection.
"How loving he was." I thought, and turned and kissed him on the forehead. His hand reached across me and rubbed my thigh, then moved up to my stomach. I felt tingly, his hand rose and stroked my ribs. I kissed him on the forehead, he suddenly lifted his head and kissed my on the lips, while his hand rose and cupped my breast. I kissed him with a closed mouth, he used his lips to open my mouth, racing his tongue into my teeth. I reluctantly opened my mouth and let his tongue touch mine. I put my hand on his as it touched my breast. I suddenly realized how wrong this was. I gulped, then broke away. "My, how affectionate you are tonight!" trying not to hurt his feelings. I gave him a kiss on the cheek. "I've got to get to bed. I have to leave tomorrow afternoon. Do you need anything?"
He just looked at me, puppy faced. I raised an eyebrow and smiled.
I lay in bed contemplating what was going wrong. The lights were out. What was happening? Had I done something to provoke him. I was his mother. How could I let him go that far? I felt guilty. A knock on the door. I knew what he wanted. "Mom, can I come in a second?"
"Sure honey?" My voice shook. I knew. I was scared. He was only wearing briefs. He crawled on the bed and put his head back on my chest. I was unable to move, not knowing what to do or say. He began kissing my neck, but I couldn't move to stop him, down toward my breast, I could feel him pull down my silk top, his tongue wrapping around my nipple. I felt the pleasure, for a moment I almost lost myself in it. His hand rubbed my thigh. I came to.
"Brian, please, I'm your mother." I wanted to be firm but kind. "You should do this with your girlfriend, not me, please."