Start
I was sluggish at work that day. I wasn't even able to get excited when the lawyer called me up and said that all the money was in the clear now. Ok. Good to know. I was still serving coffee to unappreciative snobs of both genders for the rest of the day. I know I probably shouldn't think that way about the customers. Who pays attention to the guy serving you coffee after all? But there was something about the curt way they all had of speaking to me that bugged me. I was doing my job and giving them what they wanted. I knew they wanted to get in and get out as fast as they could so I did my best to make that happen. Would it hurt them to at least see me as human and not a machine? Well, they didn't all see me as a machine, just the guys. Most of the women who came through the coffee shop treated me either like the gum on the sole of their shoes or like a sex doll they could make comments about where I could overhear. There were even times when they'd be on the phone and come up to the counter and somehow expect me to be able to read their minds instead of pausing their ever so important conversation to blurt out an order instead of just pointing at the sign above my head with fifty different options on it and no way for me to know what they mean.
When it was getting near to closing time, one of the last women to come into the shop commented to her friend that she wouldn't mind taking me around the back of the building and fucking me.
"Look at that ass." I heard her say.
If they only knew. Man o man. If they only knew. But of course if I went over to her and asked for her number, that would be sexual harassment.
My mother arrived just as we were locking up but I told her I had an errand to run. She wanted to know what it was and I lied and said I needed to visit the post office. See, I had this weird suspicion that it was my mother who was going around and causing trouble for me with the money stuff so I was going to try and keep her in the dark. Besides, I knew she was greedy anyway.
At the lawyer's office I was presented with some final form to sign and then the banker that was there said that this was the last step. All the money was mine to do with as I pleased. I was given a bank card, a check book, a statement and a prospectus (whatever that was).
"That was fast." I said.
"We fully expected the judge to rule in our favor so the bank got ready for this eventuality."
"What about the lawsuits and stuff?"
"There might be another that gets filed but as of right now, the two already against you were thrown out."
"So how do I keep them from filing against me again?"
That question had a much too complicated answer for me to write here or even remember. What I took from it was basically; yes there are ways to keep someone from suing you but no I couldn't do that yet unless it was malicious and they hadn't taken it that far yet or something.
I went back to the coffee shop and my mother was very impatiently waiting.
"What were you doing in there for that long?"
"I was asking about a safety deposit box. They don't have any, so they said I had to go to a bank."
"What do you need a safety deposit box for?"
"You never know. Important documents. Photos. I don't know, but I want one. The guy at the post office recommended this one."
"Well, you'll have to do it tomorrow. I need to get home."
"I can ride the bus home."
"No. Not today. We're going home."
I could have fought her on it and insisted that this was my plan but I didn't. I was exhausted for some reason and I really just wanted to sit on the very cushy sofa in the living room. And that was just what I did. Well ... for all of about fifteen minutes before my parents came to me and started to talk funny.
"We really want you to think about your future." my father said. Then there was vague platitudes about life and all that. I really just wanted to close my eyes.
"Now this is important, John." my mother said.
"You already helped us out a great deal with the residency requirements but if you can get an image of the big picture. ..."
"Big picture. Sure. Can we talk about this later?"
"Now son, you may not know this but even though I'm the founder of my ... ahem ... our company, I don't own it out right. I actually only own 30%. One day, that will all be yours but then you'll still have three other people who can always outvote you."
"What about Terri and Denise?"
"Your older sister made her feelings clear when she left us." my mother said. "And as for Denise, we trust that you'll take care of her no matter what."
"What? Why are you guys talking like this? It's not like you're going to die tomorrow."
"Of course not, son." my father said. "But after spending the night in the woods during an unexpected storm, you should know that we have to plan ahead even if the worst never comes."
"What are you asking? Get to the point."
"The point son, is that my company is about to have a huge increase in revenue. I've been working on a certain project very diligently and it is about to pay off. My partners, they have no idea what's going on. They could care less about the company. They never help me with anything but always have their hands out."
"Then why did you sell parts of the company to them?"
"I needed investors at the time but it was always supposed to be part of the deal that they help me out. Well, I've been doing all the work."
"So you want to buy back the rest of the company."
"Exactly. Only I won't have enough money to do it until after this project gets off the ground and by then it would be too late. They'd never sell me back my company if they really knew how much money it was about to earn."
"So get a loan."
"That would raise red flags and get them to investigate." my mother objected.
"I don't know what you're talking to me about this for."
"You met with the lawyer today, didn't you?" my mother said. Oh, so she'd been spying on me the whole time. I wondered when else she'd done that. "She told you about the judge's decision, didn't she?"
"Yeah, so?"
"So son, if we package it to look like I just want to give my boy a head start in business we might be able to convince them to sell. I know we can't buy back all of it, but we can probably get another 15%, and than once the money ..."
"Wait. Are you allowed to tell me all of this? What about insider trading stuff?"
"This is a privately held company. That doesn't apply to us. And besides, we're family and you have an interest in the workings of the business. It's not my fault that my partners don't check in with me more often."
Then my mother came closer to me and started holding my hand. "John. We just need you to help your father out. We're not asking for a loan. That would be wrong for a parent to borrow money from a child. If you use your money to buy a percentage of the company, then that part is yours. All yours. Not ours. But we're family so we'd expect you to support your father."
"Why does this feel really shady?"
"It's not son. And if you want, after we start getting money in, I'll buy your shares from you and you can have your money back."
"Then how is this not a loan?"
"You don't have to sell your shares. You can keep them if you want. It's up to you." my mother said.
"Well, for right now, can I just sleep on it. I'm so tired. Really."
"We need you to hurry son." my mother said.
"No, it's ok." my father said. "Let him rest for now. But after dinner, we'll talk again. Oh, and think of some questions for me. I'll answer whatever you want."
They finally left me alone and I was happy to have my hand back. My mom was really creeping me out.
I'll save you the long and pointless conversation after dinner. My father tried to explain to me what exactly it was that his company did. I didn't really get it and I didn't agree to buy anything. For all I knew, he could be lying to me. However, I did agree to go with him to his office on Wednesday to see things for myself.
...
Tuesday was another day at the coffee shop. During my break, I ran across the street to the ATM to use my card for the first time. Wow. I had immediate access to $11,000. If I wanted more, I could ask for transfers from money markets or mutual funds and stuff but I didn't really know what any of that was so I didn't think about it. As far as I really cared, I didn't have the rest of that money. It was too many extra steps away from my fingers so it felt unreal to me.
Still, eleven thousand dollars should at least be enough to buy a car. I guessed I needed a drivers license first so I had to get that. Plus, my school had a rule against student owned cars so I couldn't bring it there. Still, I could buy a car.
At lunch, I called my mother using the shop's phone and told her I was going shopping after work. She offered to drive me but I told her I already had a ride. See, Tuesday was Terri's off day from her job this week but I was guessing my mother didn't know that. I wasn't going to take any chances, however.
I met Terri three blocks away from the shop after work and we quickly drove to the bank where the first safety deposit box was. There were others I needed to check but they were in other cities.
In the bank I was brought over to a special room for looking at the box. Terri decided to wait outside. She said it was my private moment and she wasn't going to intrude.
When I opened the box I found ... a stack of diplomas? What were these? I took a closer look. Oh, they were ... stock certificates. Ok. I'll have to look up what that means. Some of them were bank bonds or government bonds. I had learned about those in civics class. Ok. So basically more money. It was funny but I hadn't known that you get an actual piece of paper when you buy a bond. I just figured it was a number in a computer.
Wonderful. The word went through my mind with all the energy of a whoopy cushion deflating.
I know. I must be crazy. I'm the only guy in the world who doesn't jump for joy at the sight of apparently very large sums of money. Well, the safety deposit box seemed a better place for these things to hang out than my bag so I was going to leave them there. But first I wanted to photo each one so I could start investigating if any of this was real. There were like thirty of these things so I carefully pulled them out and got my pictures.
Then, under the last one I found something more interesting. There were two white envelopes. One had written on it, 'Discover everything'. The other said, 'Get on with your life'.
Now, my first inclination was to open both right away but then I remembered that I was dealing with crazy magic stuff here. Yeah, life could wait, I wanted to know.
I opened the first letter. It began with a warning not to open the other letter under any circumstances.
