You really should read Eli's Awakening before this if you haven't already. It's the only way to really enjoy the story.
Disclaimer:
All Characters in this story are fictitious and in no way to my knowledge resemble anyone living or dead. All characters are of the legal age of consent (18) during any scene of sexual intercourse, voyeurism and masturbation included.
Chapter Five
There was an unsettling feeling of guilt that accompanied the sunrise that morning. It came seeping into Eli's consciousness much like the daylight did through the window of John's bedroom, planting itself in the same juncture between her eyes as did glare of the sun.
Of all the things she could have inherited from her mother. She hadn't got her blonde hair or blue eyes, nor her love of animals or rather animal skin. But she had inherited something infinitely bigger. She'd inherited a lover, her father, the source of her guilt.
When she had opened her eyes and found herself alone in his bed, her hope that he didn't regret the night before had died. And thus her guilt was born. He must regret their lovemaking, that was the only explanation.
She hadn't thought she could feel any more wretched than she had for the last couple of weeks, but this surmounted everything. She needed to talk to him, fix the pain she was so obviously causing.
She sprinted from bed and almost forgot she was still very naked, grabbing the sheet, she wrapped it around herself and completely missed the small spots of blood that tarnished the whiteness.
It wasn't until she was at the bottom of the stairs that she heard the voices coming from the kitchen. It didn't take much dialogue for her to recognize Sophie's voice. It was then, right before she turned the corner to the kitchen where they were, that she saw the blood.
Shit...
She rushed upstairs to her room and changed into her biggest T-shirt and a pair of shorts. She stopped long enough to brush her teeth and hair and wash her face, telling herself she just wanted to make certain she didn't show any obvious signs of last night's events, but really she was giving herself time.
When she got back downstairs, taking all of about fifteen minutes before she decided she had better face Sophie, it was to find her holding John's hands in both of hers while looking imploringly into his eyes.
Jealousy snaked through her, replaced by anger when John suddenly recoiled from Sophie's grasp when he noticed her, his face full of guilt. This dismissed her anger and replaced it with fear, she turned expectant eyes to Sophie.
"Sophie, what are you doing here?" It was Sophie's time to recoil.
What was going on here?
"I'm sorry to intrude, Eli."
Eli became instantly apologetic. "No, it's... it's just that I'm not used to seeing you so... early. I just thought something might be wrong."
'Oh God, had Dad called her over to confess?' She wondered.
Sophie seemed to accept this and smiled, though not as cheerily as she used to. "I actually came to bear good news."
When she didn't say anything else Eli became aware that she was standing much too firmly in the center of the doorway, so she walked to the fridge and took out a carton of milk. Sophie continued her story when Eli came to the table with her cereal, milk and bowl and spoon.
"My company," she worked for a very successful events planning company. "has been putting on for the past number of years a Caribbean Jazz and Blues Festival which has gained in popularity and has become one of the most highly anticipated events annually in the jazz community."
Eli listened, while forcing the cereal she really didn't want down her throat. What she wanted was for Sophie to leave, and for her Dad to explain to her the strange look on his face she saw whenever she dared to look at him.
He looked back at her finally, and a smile started in his eyes. It was a smile filled with sexual innuendo, she nearly choked and quickly looked to see that Sophie hadn't noticed a thing. She was saying something about John's trip to Jamaica.
"What?" Eli had been so focused on John's smile that she had blocked out Sophie's voice.
"We need him for the culminating show, which features..." she named one of the world's most prominent jazz singers. "She lost her pianist due to a broken arm he suffered while scuba diving three days ago in Anguilla. She asked specifically for your father." She turned to John again when she said this, but found that he was avoiding her eyes.
She took a steady breath and began to rise from her chair. "I must get back to work. Your father can fill you in on the rest of the details." She declined when John offered to walk her to the front door, and was out of the kitchen before he sat back down.
Eli kept putting cereal into her mouth, still so nervous she didn't even taste it. She had no intention of stopping until John moved the bowl aside.
"It was my intention to stay with you."
She felt her insides grow tender.
"I broke things off with Sophie the night of my show. So that look you gave me when you came in," his accusing voice and teasing expression didn't match. "hurt my feelings."
She couldn't help laughing. Her confidence was rushing back. "I didn't know you broke it off with her. And you looked pretty cozy."
His look became more pensive.
"She didn't take it too well I suppose." She said.
He folded his arms and leaned back in the chair, shaking his head he said, "We were in two different places." A pause. "I mean, for instance, this morning..." he started to grin mischievously. "I was in bed with you."
Eli laughed at his attempt to lighten the mood but couldn't help the blush that came to her cheeks, he wasn't letting her off the hook though.
"Where I would like to be again. Soon." He added. "But first, and I know I've been saying this a lot lately, we need to talk. Or rather, I need to talk."
When her brow knotted up with worry, he reached across and thumbed her cheek, quickly telling her that he had no regrets about his decision. His eyes showed a, 'however' though, so Eli smiled, but the frown only slightly diminished.
"Melissa..." great, he used her full name. "I have been in quite a few rela... I'll make this short, you have to get to school.
"I know what fits, Eli. I know that for me... it's you." He pauses. "I also know that you are so mature, but still so inexperienced..."
"Dad... no." She pleaded, near tears. "You can't be saying..."
He silenced her with a shh and his index pressed gently to her mouth. He gave her a 'silly rabbit' look. "Are you blocking out parts of what I'm saying? I fully intent to fuck you before you have to leave for school, but not before I finish what I have to say."
She was confused, but his harsh language and the images it portrayed had burned a hole in her stomach that kept her silent.
"What I am trying to say is... I'm a given, Eli for as long as you want me. And when you meet someone else," He nodded, dismissing the look of denial in her eyes. "You probably will, don't feel you need to spare my feelings. All I want is your promise that we will always be close, sex or no."
"What about you? What if you find someone else?" She asked, her voice tiny.
