The weeks and months speeded by as I got wound up in work. The case I had been working on got nasty and took a lot of time. There were other cases too. I went home tired every night and fell into bed too tired to do anything but eat and sleep after taking care of the horses. All thoughts were focused on upon the heavy workload I had. I forgot about my three cousins and what they did and what they had tried to do. I had decided no man was going to ever touch me again that is except for Eddie. I missed Eddie something awful. I had made up my mind if and when Eddie showed back up I would make sure he would never leave me. I went off my birth control the week after I got home. I wanted to make sure he would get me pregnant. I wanted to have his baby inside me.
I changed where I ran so I wouldn't run into David, the older guy that I had been thinking about seducing. I started running in sweat pants and sweat shirts. I dressed more conservative at work. Jean even made the comment that I was more serious now, more aggressive when I went snarling after some guy for not supporting his family or defending some woman in a divorce case. I didn't want to attract attention to myself by looking sexy. I did my best to avoid looking sexy. I did not want to appear to be attractive to any other man. Eddie was the only man I wanted. I went as far as going natural and quit shaving down there. My bush was back in full glowing glory.
I thought felt better after getting off the pill. The cramps I had during my cycle was a little worse and my period was heaver but I felt more alive, more natural. I dreamed about Eddie just about every night. Us being together and fucking like rabbits, him taking me whenever he wanted and whenever I wanted. I dreamed of getting pregnant and having his baby. We lived somewhere else, away from our family where no one knew we were brother and sister. It was blissful, our being together.
It was three months later when I got the phone call from Billy. I had just gotten home from work and changing out of my "office attire" of white blouse and dark wool skirt with matching jacket. I had just removed my jacket, blouse and bra and had slipped out of my skirt and was standing in just my sheer lace panties when the phone rang. I picked it up on the second ring.
"Hello Sara, is that you."
"Yes, this is Sara, who is this?" I didn't recognize the voice.
"It's me Billy. You remember?"
"Yes I remember you Billy. Why are you calling? I thought things were all done between us and your so called friends."
"Well the reason I'm calling is that I thought you were going to send me the pictures of the reunion. I thought you promised to send them. You still have my address?"
I stood there thinking in silence as I listened to his voice, the events of being with the three of them came crashing back. I was ashamed that I had liked it and it was because them I had sworn to stay away from all men except for Eddie. "Oh god Eddie I so miss you..." I said under my breath. I listened to Billy's breathing on the other end for several more seconds before I replied.
"I forgot. I got too caught up in work. I just forgot Billy. I'll send them to you this weekend. I'm sorry I forgot." I didn't really mean it. I wasn't sorry at all. I had just about decided he wouldn't get them at all.
"Doesn't matter, I'll get them soon enough."
I began saying, "What do you mean get them soon enough..." When the doorbell rang. Shit I mumbled under my breath. "Just a minute Billy, someone's at the door."
Fuming at his call and now the interruption of the doorbell, I slipped on one of Eddie's large t-shirts that barely covered my thighs that I sometimes slept in and walked to the door holding the phone in my hand. I dropped it in shock when I opened the door. Billy was standing there. "What the shit are you doing here Billy?" I stammered as I looked at him.
"Surprised to see me again? I'm here to get my pictures. I didn't think you would send them. Aren't you going to invite me in?" He pushed by me and entered without missing a beat. "I'm on my way to San Diego, I joined the Marines and wanted to stop by and see you. I wanted to get my pictures. You promised to send them, you remember?"
"What?" I hadn't been quite listening, still getting over the shock of seeing him. I had heard "pictures and something about Marines" and muttered, "Fuck". He was still talking and I wasn't listening. I was still in shock and looking out the door expecting to see Kevin and Mike.
I turned and faced him. "Where is Kevin and Mike?"
"You didn't hear me? They got into a lot of trouble and are in jail. I don't think their parents are going to bail them out this time. They wanted me to ask you if you would defend them."
I still wasn't quite listening and asked, "What the hell are you talking about, Kevin and Mike in jail and me defending them. Who asked to have me defend them? What is this all about?"
"Kevin told me to ask you."
"Kevin? Just what did he and Mike do?" I didn't want him in the house but I was curious. "Sit down and tell me about it." I wanted to find out what they had done. With Billy being alone, I didn't feel any apprehension in being alone with him. I felt safe enough. Billy sat on the couch and I sat in a chair facing him.
"Ok. Tell me." I was intently watching his face and was so curious about what he was going to tell me that I forgot I was nearly nude and wasn't really aware that the t-shirt had slid up and was not really covering me.
"Kevin and Mike got in with the wrong crowd and into drugs and drugged some girls at a party and raped them. They were the first ones and the ones the girls remembered. There were other guys doing it to them too." He paused for a few seconds before continuing. "Anyway they got caught." He paused again and that was then I noticed where he was looking. I rose up just a little and worked the t-shirt back into place and pulled a pillow into my lap to cover me more.