Chapter Four
So... look. I know we're not here for the boring nerd game. But I swear it's integral to the story. And I'm pretty sure that I may need to provide a recap of events thus far. God knows, even those of us actually playing needed one. We'd been drunk, had our brains fucked out, and otherwise been thoroughly distracted, throughout most of our gameplay sessions.
Now, I'm sure Violet told it better, she's a great DM. When we'd all managed to re-gather at the table as the afternoon shadows lengthened, she told us a recap full of flowery language and dark foreboding.
But, frankly, I barely remember it. So here's my version.
Once upon a time, a sage of the Azure Codex sect of mages decided to finally explore a temple that had sprung up in nearby woods about fifty years back. It would have happened sooner, but, y'know, paperwork. So they sent an intern and some hired hands to go poke at it. Marla, a bodacious redhead, played the intern and equally bountiful wizardess named Vulverna. The hirelings were an Amazonian barbaric woman, Stabitha, a tabaxi thief named, un-originally, Kitty, and a priestess of the goddess Orgismia, who went by Clittiara. Each of them were run by, in turn, Ashley, my sister, Kirsten, a blonde, and brunette Jayne, who was roleplaying the shit out of being a devotee of a goddess of love.
These four made it to the temple and, eager to glimpse its secrets, activated a trap while attempting to force open the door. The stone guardian was about to kill them all, when me and the boys showed up, making quick work of the agitated statue, and earning rewards from the girls. There was Theo's bard, Fernando Two-strings, Ben's devilish warlock, Destin D'vil, and me, piloting a warforged (kinda a robot) monk called Steelwind, who was mute due to some negligence on his designer's part.
We joined up, and probed our way cautiously into the temple. We made it past trapped room after trapped room, and found some carvings on the wall. However, when we did, Stabitha and Clittiara fell into an undetected trap, and Steelwind dove after them to try to rescue the girls. He failed.
That left the three of them, not dead, but on a black, endless plain. They made their way back to the room of the temple they'd just left, eventually, Clittiara praying to her goddess in a most profound and unexpected way to do so. When they returned they found themselves unable to relate their experiences, though the memory remained vivid.
There were more rooms, more traps. Eventually, one magical snare bagged two more of the group at once, banishing Fernando and Kitty to an undescribed place. We puzzled out another clue, and tried to magic our way into a secret passage. It backfired. Thick fog enclosed the room, Destin and Vulverna were snatched away under its concealment. The barbarian woman, mechanical man, and the priestess were all that was left. The last thing that happened, in game, was they'd found a mysterious flagstone in the center of the room, and had failed to figure it out in any way.
In the real world, practically every single person had smashed each and every other person in the house since the last trap went off, culminating in an exhibitionist three way between myself and the dungeon master and Jayne, who got subbed out by Ben at some point. I'd lost control of basic motor functions when I came and fell onto the deck, which made my sister react in a very unusual way.
There. All caught up? Good. On with it then.
***
"Roll it." Violet said to Ben, who'd gathered up four D10s. He'd designated a color for each place in the D10,000 roll he was getting on a magic item table out of the internet searches of our dungeon mistress.
The dice clattered to the table. "Five thousand, six hundred and twenty nine."
Violet scrolled furiously on her phone. "Oh. Oh, God." She busted out laughing. "Seriously. It's a fucking sign. You get..." she paused, partly for dramatic timing, partly to suppress laughter. "...a rod of tentacles."
The giggle fit she was having became contagious. At least among those who'd played before. I explained to Ashley, on my left, and Jayne, on my right, what that probably was... they began to giggle, too. Violet began to read out its exact description, while Ashley got up, telling me she'd be right back. I followed her, out of curiosity, and because I thought I knew where she was going with this. I also needed some things from the same drawer, if I was right.
Now... just to get the mood set appropriately, not one of us wore a single stitch of clothing. We'd tossed out some tea towels for our guests to sit on, nobody wanted bare bungholes on our kitchen chairs, but... seriously, clothes were just getting in the way, and had been all day. So when I followed Ash upstairs, I was treated to a view of her flexing buttocks that was fresh and enticing.
I was still getting used to it, our newfound 'closeness.' Seeing that face, the face of my tormentor, the mean big sister, attached to that amazing body, bare for my viewing pleasure... It was a head twist. The fact that she returned my hungry stares with roving eyes of her own was a bonus.
She even stopped at the top of the stairs, laughing when my nose grazed the crease between her cheeks. "Last year I would have farted in your face," she joked, and kept walking.
I caught up to her. She wasn't going where I thought she had been, to mom and dad's sacred room. Instead she walked into her own, and bent to rifle through her nightstand drawers. "Last year, you would have yelled at me for setting a single foot in your room." I ran a finger up her spine, standing close behind her. She straightened up and gave me a look over her shoulder.
"Oh..." I'd taken advantage of her new posture to cup her breasts, they filled my hands like they'd been made to do just that. "...fuck last year," she continued. "Today is a bright new day."
We dallied for just a few seconds, me squeezing her tits and nibbling at an ear, her reaching a hand behind her to fondle my thickening cock. Then she turned to face me, holding a long, transparent purple, double headed dildo. "Think this will do for his wand?"
"Perfect." I gently moved her to the side, and peeked in her drawer. "Wow. Quite a collection."
"You buy books and dice, I buy clothes and toys."
"Here... I need this... and this..." I selected two hand held devices, one a simple bullet shaped vibrator, the other, a longer, four inch one.
She snapped them on and off, making sure they were charged. "What for?"
"I decided my guy has vibrating hands."
She grinned. "Mmm. Steelwind is gonna get popular."
We took our new devices downstairs, and I collected the lube I'd stashed earlier in the day to add to the fun. Ben accepted his 'wand' with due ceremony, lifting it to the sky as the girls mimicked an angelic choir.
Seriously, all the fucking aside, I made a mental note to recruit more females to play DnD with. They brought a new level of fun to the game. No, not just that kind of fun, get your mind out of the gutter. Or keep it there, I'm not your boss. Anyways, I distributed lube to all sides of the table, and sat back at my spot, setting the vibrators within easy reach. Violet scrutinized my selections, and we continued.
So, she dropped into her narrator tones, and Vi gave us another little breakdown to catch us up on our split party's adventures. "Kitty and Fernando. When you were zapped by the rune, you found yourselves in front of an ancient demon, did you not?"
Theo smiled. "Ancient, smoking hot demon. Long black hair, fantastic tits, acid green eyes..." Violet demurely smiled, Theo was describing her.
Kaitlyn took over when he trailed off. "She made us a deal. If we could get some... essence... from our party members, then we could get to leave the temple alive. Initially we refused."
