Discovery 29

This story is factual. Initially I wrote it in bullet points to clear my thoughts and try to understand how I arrived at that point. Then I decided to expand the bullet points to 'flesh out' what they meant. Every time I revisited the notes I wanted to add something I'd left out and most times I realised I was almost creating a short story. Sometime after that I discovered Literotica and decided my story could be expanded into something erotic. In writing it, I discovered that it excited me almost as much as the original experience did and I hope you enjoy it as much.

It's a cautionary story about my journey into a different life and there is a part that will give you cause for thought. There are, as in all parts of real experiences, lots of back stories, side paths, consequences and outcomes. Apart from thinly changed names, everything else is exactly as it happened. Maybe I'll write about them at another time; let's think about that then. It's partly confession and partly to confess my guilt. I have become part of somebody else's life in a way very few ever do. I've decided to write my little story for Literotica for my pleasure and to recall in years to come, how I came here.

If you, dear reader, are inspired sexually, then I will have done for you what my actions lead me into. Think very carefully before using my words to justify your thoughts or actions. What I did was wrong and although, if I could rewind time, I'd do things very differently, for now I have few regrets.

*

My name is Jane and I'm 41. I've been 'normally' married for 21 years. When I use the word 'normal' from now on, I mean it in the sense of societal mores. I know that normal varies from town to town and state to state but I'm sure you can guess what I mean.

I met my husband when I was 19 and we married about a year after that. He's a good-looking mechanical works engineer who spends half his time in the office and the rest at building constructions supervising installations for contracted business. He's still in good shape but I don't get to see that shape much anymore. He rather prefers time at the golf course or football and seems to be more focussed on everything but me. Therefore, some nights and even in the mornings if he's gone and I'm still in bed, I masturbate. Usually just the same old, lie on the back, open my legs, tweak my nipples and rub until bingo. Boring but nice.

Like most of my friends, we believe that sex is something that happens if an opportunity arises. If I go to bed before him, I don't lie there in anticipation of what might happen and he doesn't come to bed earlier. To be honest, it can be months from one to the next and I understand why sex toys are so popular. I'd begun doing some market research one day when I 'innocently' started to look at other sites. Let's be quite honest here, when i say 'other' sites, I mean quite clearly, porn sites. What I saw was quite inspiring and although most of it was just confected, the credible home-made stuff was fabulous. I learned how to search for hetro intercourse, lesbian couplings (yumm), hidden cam stuff... As time went by, I explored more topics and found that most, rather than shocking me or disgusting me, aroused me.

I discovered fetishes, extreme pornography, funny stuff and just about everything one could imagine. One day I discovered incest. Although it made me uncomfortable, I kept browsing. Brothers and sisters, mothers and sons, fathers and daughters, it was very confronting but highly exciting. I thought about my relations and couldn't shake off some of the potential experiences that might have happened over the years. I have a sister that I'd been slightly intimate with; I'd listened to my parents in their bedroom and wondered what it would be like for my father to be taking me. I didn't have a brother but wondered what I'd have been like with him.

I have two children; Emma who, at the time of the first event was 20 and Charlie who was 18. Em goes to Uni across the state and Charlie had started at one in the same city. They both could have studied at the same one but Em told us she wanted to begin to spread her wings. So her room is empty through the week and I use it as a quiet space and to do some work. I am fortunate that I can generate income from home as a book-keeper and accounting assistant. Em's room is sort of an overflow room and I often spread folders and papers across her bed and use her computer and printer.

One day, as I was rearranging things from her dresser to her drawers, I discovered that she'd beaten me to buying a sex toy. I wanted to be mature and just ignore it but after the initial leap of excitement, I wanted to examine it. I t was black and quite large, larger than I'd considered, weighty and veined. For a moment I considered using it but felt that wouldn't be right. I smelt it though and although there was nothing I could detect, the thought of that having been in my sweet daughter's pussy made me instantly aroused. I put it on her bed and sat at the chair so I could look at it while I masturbated. In a flash I'd stepped out of my panties, pulled up my skirt and was madly fingering myself. I wanted so badly to be penetrated by that obscene object and within moments, had the best orgasm I'd ever experienced. I felt a bit weird about it, my daughter's room, my daughter's toy; but drooped in that chair, legs still open, dress pulled high and looking at myself in her dressing mirror, I let any strange feelings float away.

Before Charlie came home, I wanted to do more so I logged onto Em's computer and started perusing; masturbation, check; Fucking, check; lesbians, check; toys, check... I became so aroused I'd grabbed a handtowel and placed it on the chair. When I needed to pee, I started to look at pantie wetting porn and when I fingered to explosive orgasm number two, I let a spray onto the towel.

The following day I checked out an on-line store and ordered something similar to Em's. My mouth was dry with anticipation and when it arrived a few days later, mid-morning and by courier, I was sooo ready.

I was fortunate that it was Charlie's long day at uni so I had the house to myself. I followed the recommendations of cleaning it. I hadn't remembered to order lubrication but I was sure with the way I was feeling that it wouldn't be necessary. I wanted to look like the girls in most of the videos -- I'm okay to look at but I had a thick bush and wanted to have a young look. Plus I also wanted to see my new toy -- a pink one -- entering me.

I undressed and went to the bathroom, ran the shower to hotter than normal and stepped in. In seconds I was in a steamy cloud and enjoying the feeling of water washing over me. I wanted to start masturbating right away but avoided the temptation. My lips were completely open and my clitoris was at hard attention but the best they received was the hand-held shower rose being directed to them. It felt so delicious but I had other tasks to attend to. I'd taken a razor and a can of shaving jell in with me. I turned off the water, sat on the floor, lathered up and started. I had never shaved before and I couldn't wait to see the result. The feel of the blade slicing through my soft brown hair was delicious. As I became more confident, I shaved closer and closer to the middle and closer to temporarily stopping to ease the fire I was feeling. I played around with leaving strips of pubic hair and even patches but finally decided that if I was to feel young again, I should look young. I hadn't looked so bald since my young teens and I knew my toy and I were going to enjoy taking my new type of virginity.

I shaved all over, my arms, legs, everywhere that gave me an excuse to run my hands over skin. I stood and let the water run again. The hair washing down the drain made me giggle as I remembered how as a teen I'd so desperately wanted to be hairy there.

I stepped out of the shower and admired my new look in the mirror. To be quite honest, at that moment I felt as beautiful as the most stunning girls I'd looked at on the computer.

I stood there admiring myself and running my fingers gently over everywhere that felt nice. My new toy, Mr Pink as I'd named him, had stayed innocently in the bedroom. I was still a little wet and although I'd planned to meet Mr Pink intimately there, my arousal overcame that plan. I wrapped a huge bath towel around me, sprinted to the bedroom, grabbed the obscenity and rushed back to the bathroom. I flopped on the dressing chair opposite the mirror and opened myself. My outer lips were parted and my inner lips were glistening. My clitoris was erect -- hard, angry and rose red.

I reached over and grabbed my new boyfriend Pinky. He was as hard as any woman could dream of, as large as any sensible woman could desire and quite beautiful. I felt his weight, firm in my hands as I imagined how he would feel in a moment. As I brought him to me, I could see my arousal had increased more than I'd believed was possible. I nervously rubbed him over my outer area and over my little clitty. I moaned and whispered my desire and I offered myself as I began to push.

I felt the bulbous head enter me and wanted to just push on but I also knew I wanted this to last. If I went at the speed I ached for, my climax would come too quickly. The thickness kept opening me and although a real man feels wonderful in his own way, Mr Pink was something again. I was now moving in deeper strokes and marvelling at how my body was accepting the never-before-experienced length. I felt him bump to my cervix and yet there was no pain, nothing I'd feared, just a full and satisfying pleasure.

I pushed faster and more aggressively and heard the wet sounds coming from my most private parts. This was a new experience; my senses were so different from my past, no love, only lust; no trepidation, only carnal desire and finally, the belief that my fantasies weren't so strange.

I could feel something stirring, a different type of tension than I'd ever felt and I leant back and closed my eyes. I was thrusting hard, deep and at an angle that sawed across my most sensitive place. As I drifted into a heady haze of close to orgasm, I heard a thump. As I shot open my eyes and clamped my legs shut, I saw Charlie turning and running to his room. Naked and with a towel falling from his waist, I realised with horror that I'd left the door quite open. Why wouldn't I?, today was one of his long days. I neither cared for why or what, I needed to do something that could cover what had just happened.

Not thinking clearly, in fact not thinking at all, I let my toy, my now ridiculous and rejected looking toy, fall to the floor. Wrapping the towel around myself, I rushed from the bathroom, grabbed his towel from the floor and followed his trail. He swung away from me as I entered his bedroom but clearly he had seen me and was fully aroused.

I rushed to him and returned his towel but it fell to the floor. We were both apologising, me for having shown myself and he for watching.

I touched his shoulder and he turned completely away from me, his embarrassment completely erasing his ability to speak. I took his silence to be anger and I only wanted to console him, to comfort him as I had when he was a child. But now he wasn't a boy, he was a man and although my son, he was an attractive man. At some tiny point of time, I realised that I wanted him in the way that a clear thinking mother wouldn't. I realised that one of the many videos I'd watched was probably true and that the sexual excitement I'd felt was real and based on something I'd felt at a base level. In my still pre-orgasmic state, all I wanted was to climax and I knew that Charlie would be the one who could best fulfil my need.

I came behind him and pulled him closer, I whispered soothing words that it was okay, that I realised he was innocent and that seeing me was just an accident. Nervously, he explained that he'd come home much earlier and gone to his room to study. When he heard me leave the bathroom, he decided he'd have a shower and stripped off to cross the corridor. Wrapped in a towel - , the towel now at his feet - he'd opened his door and saw me.

I asked if he was angry and he reassured me that he wasn't, that he was just surprised to know that his mother did what he'd seen. At that point I gulped and asked him if it had been exciting to see me and his new silence told me the answer was probably yes.

"Charlie, look at me", I quietly commanded, and as he did, I loosened my towel and let it collapse to the floor.

His penis was hard and erect and although he briefly tried to turn away, it spoke about the effect all this was having on him. I raised my open arms so he could see me clearly and could see that I wanted him to move the small step into my embrace.

I quietly mouthed the words "I love you Charlie", and with that, he came to me. Unsure what to do next, he remained passive and let me wrap my arms around him. I looked up into his confused eyes and kissed him. He kissed me lightly as a boy would kiss his mother, cute but nothing more -- I wanted him as a lover and kissed him as such. This time he felt the heat and permission to kiss me as I wanted him to. I felt his mouth close on mine and the chaste kiss became a passionate lock. I let my tongue move over his lips and at that point, he wrapped me into his arms and pulled me into him.

The two of us remained like that for minutes, naked, intertwined and discovering moment by moment, every nuance of the other's lips, breath, warmth, and shape. At long last, without words, we stepped back a pace and lay on his bed, still locked in our embrace. Like two lovers who are strangers, we touched and explored, sometimes intimately, sometimes innocently. We explored the responses of touching and it became obvious that just as I wanted him, he was ready to give himself.

I wasn't sure then and I'm still not whether he was a virgin. He seemed assured in some ways and less in others such as the way he touched my breasts or kissed me there. I remembered the way he suckled as a baby and now I cupped his head as he teased the exquisite pleasure from my sensitive nipples. He was assured when he began to stroke between my legs and confident when he began to insert a finger into me. My sexual readiness was unfulfilled and I knew that I couldn't resist my urge or his desire.

As I slightly pulled away and motioned for him to lie back, I quickly straddled him and let him enter me. This time I wasn't prepared to slowly ease the depth into me, I needed full penetration and in one move, I had fully enveloped beautiful Charlie into me.

He looked into my eyes one final time for reassurance and then pulled me down to continue our kiss. I however, could only focus on the hardness from my son; the heat that I was sure was burning me and the way that oxygen was disappearing from my breathing. In only a moment I was wet with perspiration and although I wanted this moment to last, I knew that like a schoolboy, I wouldn't last.

I wanted to make love for hours but that seemed impossible, I wanted to make love until the room was dark but that would also be impossible. Then a moment of avoidable dread hit me -- we were having unprotected sex. I hadn't been using contraception for a couple of years and had instead, relied on my husband to use condoms. That wasn't happening now and suddenly I felt very frightened. Even at that point of intercourse, a man can release enough pre-ejaculation to cause pregnancy.

"Charlie, tell me when you're about to cum" I grunted and with a nod right at that moment, I felt him tighten. I lifted myself as the first spurt came from him. He thrust at me, trying to reengage as any buck should but the thought of my son impregnating me was too frightening. I moved forward so that he could get some pressure between my cheeks and I felt wave after wave of his warmth erupt against me.

He looked at me with a little disappointment I think, but quickly realised that I must have had a reason. I reached across for my discarded towel and laid it on the bed under me. As we lay in a collapsed embrace, I felt his semen drool down me and I shivered at what might or might not have just happened.

"Charlie, are you okay with what we did?" I asked him and he confessed that he'd wanted that for years. He confessed that he masturbated thinking about me and that he sometimes thought about hiding a camera in the bathroom so he could see me.

As he told me these things, we lay close and cuddled. We kissed and whispered and touched and fondled. He was hard again and clearly wanted me. I jumped off the bed and scampered to my bedroom, returning with a condom. Although I'd never done oral sex before, now I knew that I wanted to please my son that way. I tore open the condom wrapper and placed it near the pillow but then kissed him as I ran my fingers over his body. I kissed him everywhere and then kissed him down to his erection, still hard but now covered with my vaginal scent. I had watched enough videos now to have great knowledge about how best to orally please a man and as I ran my tongue around the smooth head, the shiver I felt told me that I would be able to do justice to his needs.

For five minutes I kissed and licked his shaft and testicles and marvelled at the taste of him. The secretions he was producing were sweet and arousing. When I finally took him into my mouth, I felt him twitch. I felt his hands caress my hair and almost absent-mindedly, I slowly took his length further and further into my mouth. I wanted to bring him to climax this way but greedily, I wanted him under and top of me again. When I felt that to go further might be to go too far, I stopped and placed the condom over his erection. It rolled on and sat tightly around his hardness; I admired the details of his cock, the shape, the veins, color, pulse... This time he knew he'd achieve his desire and I was determined to prolong both our pleasures.

I knew the signs of a man near climax and I decided I'd treat Charlie to as much prolonged pleasure as I could. I lay back and opened myself to him. I marvelled at how big and strong he looked now as he hovered over me and probed my outer parts with his manhood. I wanted to thrust at him now, I wanted to feel as filled as I had with Mr Pink, I wanted to feel like the porn stars I'd masturbated to and I wanted him to look at me as a lover. When he finally entered me properly, I pulled him towards me and made him stay still for a moment. I made him stay still for as long as I thought we could both bear and to let us enjoy the sense of connectedness a man and woman can feel. He kissed me confidently and stopped looking so worried.

Finally, he opened my arms and laid me open to him in the crucifix position. I felt so taken to have myself pinned in this position, Charlie knew more than I'd expected and I felt happy I hadn't corrupted him too much. He started to move inside me and now, less overwhelmed by our situation, I could enjoy the subtlety of our coupling. I felt him vary the depth and speed of his penetration and I looked at the passion on his face.

When he lifted my legs over his shoulder, any modesty I might have once had was gone forever as I was revealed to him completely. I looked at my lover looking at me and our smiles told me that everything was alright. I knew that later I'd feel guilty and that this would never again be simple but at that moment, I just craved to be taken, to be treated as something other than his mother and to create a new type of bond.

This time his stamina was at its maximum and I could tell he was going to give me the greatest pleasure of my life. He was putting so much strength and speed and depth into me that I was in awe of his potential. We changed positions and he mounted me from behind, he being the dog and I his bitch. We were able to see each other in the mirror and it was like looking at somebody else but feeling the same pleasure. In some ways, it was like watching a porn couple. The sound of him slapping against me, his panting and grunting, my gasping and groaning were the sounds that are in themself arousing. I could feel sweat or juice trickling down my thigh and knew that I was sweating like an athlete.