That day was a special day.
It marked the one-year anniversary since mom had left us. She fell in love with some other guy and decided
he
was more important than us. When she said goodbye, she smiled at me with a sad little smile and said that, someday, I would understand.
I highly doubt that.
It had been difficult without her.
Not that we couldn't take care of ourselves, but dad was always sad. He tried to hide it from me, but I could see it when he thought I wasn't around. I told him he should meet other women, but he always refused. Said it was too early.
He was lonely, though.
As for me... I'm nineteen and my breasts have grown quite a bit in the past year. I've had to deal with all the guys at school throwing me salacious looks--and not just at school. Not that I mind. If I'm fair, I rather enjoy the attention. But it's been distracting. And I'm constantly worrying about my father, so I've had little time to think about sex.
Well, that's not entirely true. I liked to fantasize about what some of those boys could do to me. But I always felt ashamed about it. How could I be thinking about such things when my dad needed me?
But in the end, the reality was that I felt lonely too.
That day, that very special day, I decided it was time to move on.
It had been a year, damn it! How much longer was I supposed to wait?
I was horny, and I just wanted to get laid.
So I put on a special suit I bought off the internet.
It was see-through.
I did put on a bra and some panties underneath...
But what's the point of see-through if you can't see through it, right?
So that bra and those panties? Kinda see-through too. But with the added layers, it made it a bit less obvious. I suppose.
I hurried down the stairs, excited at the thought of parading in the street like this.
Was it even legal?
I wasn't sure, but I didn't care.
I'd just walk a few blocks, then come back.
Surely I wouldn't get into trouble for that, would I?
I was getting wet just thinking about my neighbors seeing me like this. They probably wouldn't even realize just
how much
of me they were seeing.
As I reached the front door, I heard my father's voice cry out.
"What the fuck?" I froze, with my hand on the doorknob. "Where do you think you're going dressed like that, young girl? I'm not even sure you could call it
dressed
."
I blushed and turned to face him.
"Look, we've both been mourning in this house for twelve months, as if mom was dead. We don't have a life anymore. Neither of us. But you know what? Mom is
not
dead. She's fucking some guy's brains out somewhere down in Mexico. In fact, I'd argue that she's more alive than either of us."
He just gaped at me.
I snapped my fingers. "Well, that ends now! At least, it does for me. I have a body that boys like to look at, and I
want
them to look at it. I even want
more
than that."
His eyes went very wide. He remained speechless as he stared at me. I thought his eyes were slightly too low, as if fixated on my chest. Oddly, it did not make me uncomfortable. If anything, it empowered me, made me bolder.
I took one step toward him and he gulped, his eyes snapping up to meet mine. "I... I can't believe you're saying these things! What got into you, Kara?"
"Nothing, dad. That's the problem. I want
something
to get into me."
He groaned. "You really shouldn't say stuff like that. It's... unbecoming. Now, I want you to go put something decent on."
I spun slowly around, to give him a good view of my entire body.
"Why? What's wrong with this? Is there any part of me I should be ashamed of? Should I hide my skin? Do you not like me the way I am?"
"This is hardly about me," he said as he cleared his throat.
My eyes went down to his crotch, and I licked my lips. "I think it is, dad! You seem to enjoy what you're seeing quite a bit."
"Enough!"
"Or what?" I turned my back to him and bent over. "Are you going to spank me for being a naughty girl?"
"To your room! Right now!"
I pouted. "Fine. But only if you come join me."
Not waiting for a response, I hurried back up the stairs to my room.
My heart was racing.
I couldn't believe what I'd just done!
This felt so much better than walking down the street.
This had felt
so much
dirtier, filthier.
It made me feel
alive
.
I suspected it made my dad feel alive, too.
I sat on my bed and stared at the door, half expecting him to come rushing in.
My hand strayed down and rubbed through the fabric at my exposed clit. I was
so
wet right now.
I heard footsteps, but they remained downstairs. It felt like my father was pacing back and forth. The sound stopped a few times, then I heard the TV turn on and I sighed, disappointed.
***
That night, during supper, dad was very silent. I noticed he didn't once look at me, keeping his eyes on his plate.
I'd tossed on some more acceptable clothes--a tank top and a skirt. Though both were tight and left my belly bare.
I was just as quiet as dad was, though I kept glancing at him. My legs crossed and uncrossed constantly under the table. I was not wearing any panties, and I kept thinking of the things I'd like my father to do to me.
It was weird.
I'd never had these kinds of thoughts before... not about him, anyway.