I awoke to the sound of my dad walking along the hallway. Do I speak? How do I approach him today? As a daughter, or a lover? No, I will pretend I am still asleep. I had an idea; "If I get up while he is in the shower, I can greet him downstairs. He would like that; I am never up in the morning. Yes, this would make him happy. I will do that." My brain is full of questions, thoughts and rambling. Am I supposed to feel this way? SEE! Another question.
While I was waiting, I decided to listen to some of my music. "DNA" started playing on my playlist; I now hear this song in a different kind of way. I chuckled to myself. Lost in the song and my thoughts; I started to sing and sway. In the corner of my eye, I saw my daddy! I do hope things are as marvellous as they were last night. After all; I have proven how much I love him; he has had the most precious gift there is, my virginity.
"Good morning, Daddy!" I decided to go in with a hug, kiss on the cheek and the first word. Waiting for a conversation has never been my thing.
Daddy looked shocked; "You are up bright this morning, my sweet. Are you okay?" Not the reaction that I was hoping for, but, hey.
I looked at him, slightly upset, slightly annoyed; "Yes, Daddy. I am okay; better than okay. I love you and you love me."
He looked at me as though it was any other morning and answered me; "That I do. Are you ready to go?" What the fuck! Did I do something wrong or is it like some of the other girls say. Once they have taken, they leave? He wouldn't do that to me surely?
On the way to the coffee shop, I looked at how my dad looked. He was happy, he was slightly rigid, awkward? He was in a different suit today. I admired how a suit fitted him and that he always did look smart. I can't stand the silence!
"Daddy, how do we act now? I know that in front of people it's to be normal, but, when we are alone is it to be normal or can we touch and things?" This helps some of my questions and breaks the silence. My brain can now relax a little.
He answered me with a part joke, part truth; "I am unsure sweetheart. I have never done this before." I couldn't help but laugh with him. I don't suppose he did. I am his only child. Yet, as he didn't say "I haven't done (past tense) and he said "I've never done (present tense); does this mean he is happy to carry on; if I am? I decided to ask;
"I think; that because you didn't say to be normal, and you didn't say you hadn't done this before that you wouldn't mind another time. As you stated that you have never done this before; does this mean you consider it a regular thing?" I didn't know what to say and how to say it. It all wanted to come out at once and I sounded ridiculous!
Daddy replied, slightly smiling. He knew I was struggling; as any father would; "I am unsure of what you want from this. I am shocked that you were a virgin, I am shocked that I wanted you in such a way, I am shocked that you would like me in any other way than your father and I am confused as to if you would want me again. I am slightly disturbed that I would gladly have a sexual relationship with you. As, I have only ever seen you as my little blueberry. Now, I see every part of you, not just your innocence."
Oh, my goodness; he is just as bad as me. I never thought that my daddy would ever not know what to do or say; he knows everything. "Wow" is the only answer I could give. As I was thinking about how to answer him properly; I bit the bottom of my lip. The only thing I did know is that I want him, and he wants me again; I like that.
Touch, this will show what I want. It's better that the shit that's coming out of my mouth. I ran my hand down the top of his thigh; looked at him and then run my fingertips between his thighs; I want to feel HIM again. "So, is this, okay?" I asked while looking at him for a response. "What do you think?" He grinned. I could feel him get harder; this is amazing. To see a penis erect is one thing, to feel it happening in your hand is another.
I decided to continue playing; how hard can it go by playing? Dad looked at me and pulled over. I don't know where we are; it looks private though. Is this a chance to get what I want, or is he going to tell me "NO?" I was answered by him pulling his chair backwards; giving me the space to see all of him. I have seen movies; I removed my belt and dad unzipped his trousers and shimmied them down. I was nervous, but I wanted to. So, I sat on top of him; it was easy to have his sex feel mine; I didn't put any underwear on today and I wore a short skater skirt. One in hope of this and two to tease; if I never got idea one.
Ouch! I thought. Wow, I am sore. I continued; after all, I did just ask for this. Daddy held my hips and made a grinding type of movement. Oh, wow. This is amazing, how can I be sore and yet, oh, so, oh, sore; "OH! Wow, I like that daddy!" I don't know where that came from, but I said it out loud! I could feel an energy run through all of my body; I had no idea what it was, but I wanted more. As I thought this, my daddy felt even harder. Hang on, is that bigger? So, harder or bigger? Which is it? I felt my mouth open. Shock, excitement, want or confusion? Oh, wow. None of them; it's pleasure. "Oh, daddy! Daddy, I'm, I'm. OHHH!" I was shivering and shaking. Daddy lifted me up and made me more comfortable. Wait, did he come? When?
"Daddy, when did you come?" I had to ask.
"I didn't that time." He said with a smile.
"Why? Didn't I do it right? Did I not make you happy?" Oh, no! I did it wrong, I feel mortified. I knew I should have learned or watched more properly.
Daddy looked upset with me, then explained; "You were perfect my blueberry; I was satisfied, it's just I didn't come. To be satisfied doesn't mean that you must come. It is hard to explain, but sometimes a man doesn't need to come. Sometimes, a man can't." Okay, I feel a prune. "Oh, okay. I'm sorry, I didn't know." Is the only thing I could think of saying.