"Only connect...only connect the prose and the passion."
-E. M. Forster
*
"That's just the trouble," Zetta said, "people don't really connect."
"What do you mean, connect?" John asked.
They were stretched out side by side on the big divan as John complained about his love woes. Zetta paused for a moment, thinking, and then said, "So many of our relationships are superficial. We pretend to be interested in others we even say we love them, but it's all on the surface, it's all about getting something for ourselves."
"You mean like Josie and me?" John said.
"Well yes, you've just been telling me how you feel about her, how when you've had sex with her you just want to get up and walk away."
"But she loses interest as well as soon as she's had her orgasm," John said defensively.
"That's just my point, darling, you're not connected. I suppose you can say it's the difference between love and lust; when you love someone you want to give to them, but when you lust for someone you just want to take from them."
Zetta sighed and went on, "It's like that with sex, if you love then after you've both had your orgasm you don't want to separate, you want to be together and soon after you're ready for more. Sometimes you might not feel like sex, but because the other person wants it you give it to them because you love them. It's different with lust, as you should know. You say that when you've ejaculated into Josie you want to leave, you even said you feel disgust and..."
"But I do, feel disgust and if you want the full truth I think to myself, 'You dirty cow Josie, letting me do that to you.'"
"That just shows you," Zetta responded, "you're simply not connected. I've never said anything to you before about it, but that was the problem with your father and me. When we married we weren't really in love. Oh we thought we were but I suppose you could say that we were in lust, and that doesn't last. We got to the point where we still had our sexual needs and tried to meet those needs with each other, but all the time disgust and revulsion kept growing.
"But that's horrible," John said.
"No more horrible than you and Josie," Zetta retorted. "Every time your father and I fucked it started out okay, it was afterwards that we both wanted to see the back of each other, and in fact that literally happened, we'd turn our backs on each other. Just suppose you married Josie, can you imagine what it would be like?"
John gave a shudder and said, "It would be a mini-hell."
"In the end you're father and I simply had to talk it out. It was sad really because he was so potent and I'm very libidinous and we could always have sex, but it wasn't enough and we both had the courage to admit it. You see my love, your father and I were simply not connected."
"So that's why you and dad split up," John said thoughtfully, "you've never said anything about that before."
"And I wouldn't say anything to anyone else," Zetta said decisively; "that information is for your ears only."
She gave a gentle little laugh and said, "I suppose that shows that we are connected my darling."
John seemed to digest this for a few moments and then said, "Do you mean that we really are connected?"
"Of course," Zetta said confidently. "There's nearly always a special connection between a mother and her son, don't you feel that?"
"Yes...yes I do," John said slowly, his face flushing slightly, "but it's different isn't it; I mean, me and Josie, you and dad, and what you said about being connected in that way?"