(chapter 2; all characters are 18 and over)
Okay so maybe I didn't give you the whole story. I mean yes, I am pregnant, and yes, my brother Wyatt is definitely the only person I had sex with before it happened. But I guess I led you to believe that it only happened once on that visit. Maybe I'm just a little embarrassed about it? I haven't really told anyone about this so I'm just sort of getting used to the idea. I don't totally regret it though. I mean if your little brother was struggling with dating and you wanted him to be even a *little* bit as confident as you, what else can you do?
Okay yes, there are other things you can do besides fuck him. But I think in this case someone had to do something, and I guess that had to be me. So yeah, no, I don't regret it. His life totally changed after that, I mean I think he's gone on a few dates now. So uh, mission accomplished? And yeah, he has thanked me a lot, so that's nice. And I think our relationship has improved too. He's definitely texting me more and asking for girl advice, which I love. Although, side note, I definitely also feel strange about that. Why? Um, hello! I have his fucking baby in my stomach and he's asking me about how to respond to some rando girl on tinder!
Whatever though. I'll figure that out.
I think maybe right now you're like, ready for me to tell you what else happened. I'm getting there. So if you remember, he was staying with me in my apartment in New York for a few days. Well the morning after we had sex was pretty fucking awkward. I think we were both in a little bit of shock about it. We didn't talk the whole morning, and he kind of kept to himself a little, like on his phone and ignoring me.
Finally around 11am we were in my living room both on our phones, I just had enough of the silence. So I asked him what he wanted to do today. He didn't really look me in the eye and sorta shrugged.
"Wyatt... this is a little weird. Maybe we should talk about this?"
"We don't need to talk about anything, Clara," he mumbled at me. He still didn't look at me, which started to annoy me.
"Okayyyyyy. Can you look at me though? You're acting weird."
"No I'm not," he insisted, and again, he kept his head down looking at his stupid Instagram.
"Wyatt. WYATT! Hey! Can you stop with your phone for a second?" Even I was surprised at how quickly I was shouting at him. He finally looked up. "*Thank* you! Geez. Can you tell me what's going on?"
"Nothing Clara! It's fine!"
I sighed pretty hard. I didn't understand why he couldn't just fucking talk to me. Boys are so immature and emotionally boring. "Wyatt, don't make me pry it out of you. Obviously this is about last night."
He didn't answer. Well at least that was like, *sort* of an acknowledgment. I sighed again. I guess I had to do all the heavy lifting.
"Do you regret it? Do you feel bad about it?"
He just sort of stared at me and then made that 'idunno' hum sound.
"Well," I said, deciding to be the adult in the room, "I feel good about it. I'm happy we did that. I wanted to help you. Plus it was fun, I thought."
His eyes shifted around, looking at my feet, then the kitchen counter. I sighed again. "Can you just tell me what's going on? Please?"
"I don't know Clara! I guess I just..."
I leaned my head forward, impatiently. "Yyyyyes?"
He paused and swallowed pretty hard. I watched his Adam's apple bob. "I dunno... it was... I just like... I can't say it..."
"Hey. Come on. You can tell me anything. I'm not going to judge you. I'm your sister and I love you. Just say it."
After another pause, he cleared his throat a bit and then finally let it out. "I guess... I just really kind of liked that. And it's weird. And I don't think I'll ever get to do that again so that just like.... sucks."
Okay I'll be honest with you. That made me smile. I'm not sure why, exactly. Maybe because I did something that made him happy? Or because he liked it too? Or because for the first fucking time in forever he was actually being honest with me? I moved a little closer to him in the living room. He was standing next to my pink velvet chair, kind of leaning on the arm.
"Did you mean you liked doing that, like in general, or with me?" I tried to speak sweetly and softly so he'd feel safe to open up.
He paused again. Then I heard him verrrrry quietly let it out, eyes glued to the floor. "I guess both..."
"Well okay then, at least now we can talk about it! I mean, I liked it too. I don't think it should happen again but that doesn't mean you won't do that with someone else, right? I mean now you know what you're doing! Plus, I mean, I can tell you, you're gonna make any woman feel prettttty satisfied." I tried to get him to smile at this. He seemed puzzled or discouraged though.
"You don't know that..."
I nodded towards his crotch. "Uhhh yeah I do. Wyatt... you are a lucky, lucky man. Women will be excited to do that with you."
"What are you talking about, Clara...?"
"Your fucking dick Wyatt! It's huge!"
"It...is? I thought this was like what everyone had."
I laughed and shook my head. "Mm-mm. Nnnnnope."
I watched him smile, a pure, uncontrolled grin. He felt proud of himself for the first time that I could remember, at least. I didn't want to butter him up too much, but I sorta blurted out, "maybe one of the biggest I've been with."
"Holy shit, really? But you've been with like, a lot of guys!"
"Ummmm yeah. I have. And let me tell you, I didn't expect my little brother to top the list, soooo..."
It did make me happy to see him smile. "So... you would do it again with me then?" He said, clearly mustering up some courage or some kind of boldness I hadn't really seen in him.