Author's note: this story immediately follows the "Sinful Needs of the Flesh" series.
*****
Samantha cried.
The clear blue waters sparkled magnificently as the sun began to set over the Pacific Ocean. It was a majestic scene that she had witnessed countless times, but still never failed to touch her to the very core.
But heartache currently commandeered her entire being.
Samantha was tall, standing over 6'2, and a lifetime of surfing and playing beach volleyball had given her a lean, athletic build. Her naturally pale skin had taken on a permanent sunbaked tan from, literally, growing up on the sand in 2-pieces bikinis. Golden blonde hair ran to her back which the athletic girl usually wore in a ponytail, and her green eyes glimmered.
Samantha fit in well with all the other beautiful bodies that crowded the Southern California beaches; she was gorgeous and she knew it.
Currently, however, the young blonde sat on a secluded strip. She had specifically chosen to come here at this time to avoid the throngs of beachgoers and annoying tourists in order to be alone with her thoughts. Rather than sport her usual skimpy bikini, Samantha wore a thick hooded sweatshirt over cut-off jean shorts that were rolled high up her long legs. Despite the added trappings and the subtropical climate, she still felt a chill in her bones.
Her depression started after she slept with her cousin ["Sinful Needs of the Flesh Chapter 1"].
Samantha met him for the first time during their family reunion, which was just this past summer. They were attracted to each other immediately, but what started off as innocent and playful infatuation quickly developed into something more... something taboo.
The young girl quickly realized that her feelings for her cousin was true love; and she knew that he felt the same way.
Samantha wasn't a vacuous girl nor was she a hopeless romantic. She was aware that their forbidden relationship was doomed from the very beginning, but, unfortunately, neither of them had possessed the willpower to resist temptation.
Or each other.
Their family reunion only lasted a few days, and their romance burned hot during that short amount of time. Still, Samantha couldn't believe the emotions that wracked her when she watched her cousin board his flight home to the East Coast. The heartbreak was as surprising as it was overwhelming, and she, much to her astonishment, had yet to recover.
This was years ago, before the rise of the digital age and the advent of social media, so the only way they could keep in touch was by telephone and letters. Samantha suffered from a gaping hole in her heart, and she often waited anxiously for his next correspondence, which did little to assuage her longing for his touch.
As she looked over the surprisingly calm ocean, Samantha smiled as she recalled the way her cousin fumbled hilariously as she attempted to teach him how to surf. That was only 6 months ago, but seemed much, much longer. She wiped away the tears, but more rolled down her face in little furrows that burned.
It was so fucked up.
Samantha swore to herself. It was bad enough that she still yearned for her cousin... to hold him, to touch him... but in the months that followed their taboo affair, her heartbrokenness gradually, painstakingly morphed into guilt. Knowing that she should've never have slept with him in the first place coupled with the fact that she didn't regret it cast the young blonde in her a current state of depression. Her heart and common sense tugged her in different directions, and Samantha found herself losing much more than just her sense of self.
Samantha was only 18 years old and had just commenced her freshman year of college. Usually a vivacious social butterfly, this should've been the happiest, most exciting time of her young life. But she was now in a dark place and had withdrawn from her friends and acquaintances. And the typically straight-A student found herself struggling in basic prerequisite courses that she normally would've be acing with minimal effort.
But things were even worse.
Her parents had recently announced that they were separating after over 20 years of marriage. This left Samantha and her sister Breanne absolutely devastated, as neither had any inking that their parents were dealing with marital issues. Even worse, they couldn't-- more accurately,
wouldn't
-- explain to their daughters the reason for their separation. Before her father moved out, he had merely stated that he still loved them all, but that sometimes unexpected things occurred, and people had to deal with it in their own way.
Samantha found his words ironic, given what transpired between her and her cousin.
But his comments seemed vague on purpose, nor was her mother any more helpful. Their unwillingness to be forthcoming infuriated Samantha and Breanne; the girls had a right to know what happened... they
deserved
to know.
Samantha hated her parents for tearing apart their family.
To add further insult to injury when her psyche was already fragile, Samantha's mother met a man not long after her father left and, after a brief "honeymoon phase", allowed her new boyfriend to live in the family home, which appalled the young blonde. She and her sister had grown up in that house, and to have this stranger move in so quickly was intrusive and insulting. It wasn't that Samantha didn't want her mother to be happy, but the wounds were too fresh.
But, apparently, not for her mother.
Breanne reacted in the same emotional manner in which she always did: she shut herself off from everyone, including Samantha, who needed her more than ever. Samantha wasn't even sure where her sister was living right now.
But if Samantha hated her parents right now, then she
despised
her mother's new boyfriend.
Robert. He was in his early 50's with long black hair that was graying and often pulled into a ponytail, and with a matching thick beard. His serious eyes were blue and his baritone voice resembled a deep rumble. Samantha was smugly proud of the fact that she towered over Robert by almost 4 inches.
At first, Samantha suspected that Robert was the reason for her parents' breakup, and even confronted her mother about him. But she vehemently denied it, and while Samantha knew that her parents were still hiding the truth, she believed her mother.
Samantha actually considered Robert to be quite handsome, and the fact that he appeared to genuinely care for her mother was of significance to the teen. It also painfully obvious that he was trying hard to get on
her
good side, to which Samantha blunted all of his efforts. She loathed him for what he represented, and treated him as horribly as she possibly could, whenever she possibly could. It was wrong, and the girl knew it. Robert was entering their lives with minimal knowledge of their family history, but Samantha didn't care; she had anointed him as the target of her sweeping anger.
Life was unfair like that.
Heavy footsteps broke Samantha out of her black thoughts, and she turned to see 2 muscular, handsome young men trudging towards her, with boardshorts and scandals highlighting their tan beach bodies. They were grinning and eying her suggestively.
"Hi, there," one of them greeted her. "Mind some company?"
Once, not long ago, Samantha would've returned their smile and welcomed them, literally, with open arms. It was clear that they, too, spent a lot of time on the beach, and she wouldn't have been surprised to remember that they were among the countless, faceless boys whom she had surfed with, or even made out with.
Today was a different story.
Samantha shook her head in disgust and gave them a dismissive wave. They turned and abruptly left, but not before uttering some uncomplimentary remarks. Unfazed, Samantha remained seated on the soft sand, her knees pulled up to her chest, as she took in the calmness of her surroundings one final time. Home was no longer a safe haven and she felt drastically out of place in her college dorm.
But the beach would always be a place where she could retreat to find peace and solitude, and the ocean would be her friend no matter what. Samantha suddenly cursed for not have the foresight to bring her surfboard along with her. But evening was fast approaching on this Friday, classes were over until Monday, and she had begrudgingly promised her mother that she would come home tonight for dinner.
Even if that meant sitting at the same table as Robert.
Samantha made the long trekk back to her Jeep and swung herself nimbly into the driver's seat. With the roof down, she took comfort in the wind that blew on her face and billowed her ponytail.
Days like today, Samantha regretted attending college so close to home, but, at the very least, it afforded Samantha more opportunity to exact cruelty on her mother's boyfriend.
******************************************************************************
Dinner, as expected, was uncomfortable. They sat at a square table with her mother and Robert across from each other, and Samantha between them. She seethed knowing that he sat in her father's rightful place, and wished with that Breanne was here right now.
For long stretches of time, the deafening silence was only interrupted by the clinking of silverware or an awkward cough. Samantha barely looked up, and when her mother attempted to engage her in conversation, the teen responded with curt, 1-word answers. Robert kept his tone light as he asked Samantha about college life, which made the girl seethe even more. Barely midway through the meal, Samantha's mother and Robert gave up, and began conversing between themselves, virtually ignoring the girl. At one point, she almost burst out in tears as they looked at each lovingly from across the table and held hands.
When her mother rose to carry some dirty dishes to the kitchen sink, Samantha remained where she was with her head bowed. Through her peripheral vision, she could see Robert and was irritated that he hadn't gotten up to help her mother. She lifted her head to look at him defiantly, and discovered that his eyes, too, were pointed downward.
Robert was staring at her legs.
Samantha's eyes widened and her skin crawled at the realization. Her jeans shorts were rolled dangerously high up her thighs, and she showed off a great deal of leg. Robert eyes lingered on her toned flesh, and the corners of his mouth curved into a greasy smile. Suddenly, he lifted his head and gave her a polite nod, unaware that he had been caught. The young girl fought back revulsion, and a biting remark almost exploded from her tongue. But her mother returned at that moment, and Samantha was suddenly even more lost in the confusing mess that was her life.
Samantha still hated Robert, but she was even more furious with her mother for reasons that she couldn't explain. All she knew was that her emotions, which had been eating her alive for months, were finally boiling over, and something needed to be done.
For the rest of the evening, Samantha didn't have to look at Robert to know that he was casting furtive glances in her direction... at her long legs, at the outlines of her breasts through the fabric of her top-- when he thought no one noticed.
An idea suddenly entered her mind, one that was so simple and evil that she contemplated it for the rest of the evening. Sure, relationships might be irreparably damaged if it came to fruition, but considering the direction her life was going, the pretty blonde didn't care too much about collateral damage right now.
