"I had a nice time."
"So did I." Jimmy leaned in and gave Kayleigh a chaste kiss on the cheek. "See you at school Monday."
Kayleigh didn't hide her disappointment. "Okay. Good night."
"G' night." Jimmy touched a finger to the rim of his brown cowboy hat then opened the screen door of Kayleigh's house for her. He waited until she was inside and began to close the wood door before he released his hold on the handle and walked back to his truck.
After starting it, even though no one inside the house would be able to see him, he waited until he had turned out of the dirt driveway onto the dark county road before rolling his eyes and letting out a sigh of relief.
Kayleigh was a nice girl who had been trying to go out with him for years. While their date would have been considered successful by most measures, for Jimmy it was a waste of time. It was not because of anything she did or did not do, but because she wasn't the one he really wanted. The only thing good about his date with her was the fact that it allowed him to set up the clandestine meeting he was now heading toward. It would have been difficult to explain to his parents that he was getting primped to go out with friends without outright lying. With Kayleigh as cover, he had the rare chance to dress up for the one person who gave him pleasant butterflies in his stomach.
Dressed in his good boots, dark green long sleeved shirt and dressy jeans with the good buckle on his belt, he knew he was looking his best. At a height of six feet three inches with a tight, lean body from years of farm work, Jimmy had medium length dark brown hair that was just long enough to show off his natural curls. His hazel brown eyes looked out from beneath a strong brow and long, dark lashes. A pointed, triangular nose was prominent on his face but balanced the full lips below it. He kept his square face shaved clean which allowed the shallow dimple in the center of his chin to show. While he knew it wasn't necessary for him to look a certain way, he liked occasionally making an effort to show he cared.
As he crossed the river, he took a steadying breath and checked the mirror. It was not because he thought he'd find anything out of place on his face, but to check that there were no headlights coming up behind him. A few hundred feet on the other side of the bridge, he turned off onto a dirt path that backtracked toward the water. For a short distance, he was exposed as he travelled parallel to the road. Anyone driving by would not miss him and in their small town, it would get back to his parents. Thankfully, no one appeared on the road for miles as the paved road finally rose to cross the river while the path he was on angled downward. He slowed as he neared the shore and when he turned to park between some trees and bushes at the water's edge, he wasn't surprised to see another truck already there with his brother sitting on the lowered tailgate smoking a cigarette.
"It's about fucking time," Jake called to him once Jimmy opened the door. "Your curfew's in about an hour and a half."
"Sorry," Jimmy said as he put on his hat and went to join his brother. He hated that even though he was eighteen, his parents still enforced his curfew and would continue doing so until he graduated in a few weeks. If he missed it, he ran the risk of his remaining senior year activities being curtailed as punishment. "Kayleigh wouldn't get out of truck. She was looking to get fucked and tried everything she could to make it happen."
Once Jimmy was within reach, Jake pulled him to stand between his spread legs. His voice lowered seductively when he asked, "Did you?"
"Fuck no," Jimmy responded, sounding almost offended. He placed his hands on Jake's thighs and lazily rubbed his hands over them. "I have absolutely no interest in going down that road."
"Why not? She's hot."
"Maybe," Jimmy conceded. "But..."
Upon hearing Jimmy's voice trail off uncertainly, a corner of Jake's mouth lifted in an understanding smile. "I get it. You're waiting for the right person."
Jake raised the hand that held his cigarette to grab the back of Jimmy's neck then pulled his brother's face toward his. Their lips met in a series of soft kisses that were neither fraternal nor erotic. It was a display of affection for each other that they rarely got to express and neither wanted it to stop. The wet crackling sounds of their lips meeting and pulling apart blended with the quiet rippling of the nearby water, crickets chirping in the distance and frogs singing their mating calls. While they kissed, Jimmy moved his hands to rub and knead his brother's back as they made out, enjoying the feel of his brother's similarly tight body.
At twenty-three years of age, Jake was five years older than Jimmy but was three inches shorter than his youngest sibling and outweighed him by about twenty pounds of sinewy muscle. He had a slightly lighter shade of brown hair that was buzzed short and usually covered with the ratty, camouflage patterned baseball cap that he was wearing. There was always dark stubble covering the bottom of his square face that enhanced his green-hazel eyes. As usual, he was wearing an old t-shirt emblazoned with the logo of a brand of beer and dirty jeans with even dirtier work boots. Overall, the brothers looked similar enough that they had been taken for twins when they were younger despite their age difference.
When they finally separated from the kiss, Jimmy hopped onto the bed of the truck and sat next to his brother. He placed a hand on his brother's closest thigh and felt Jake do the same to him. "How do you do it?"
Not knowing what his brother was talking about, Jake took a pull from his smoke then asked as he exhaled, "Do what?"
"Date Shelly while knowing that you have no interest in her."
Jake sighed heavily. Instead of answering right away, he flicked the stub of his cigarette away then slid back into the bed of the truck. The odor of dirt and manure that he had moved around the family farm earlier in the day lingered but he didn't bat an eyelash as he laid down. As Jimmy took off his hat then laid next to him, he said, "It's what I have to do. Believe me it sucks, but it's not like I can tell Mom and Dad that I'm in love with my brother and want to shack up with him."
Startled, Jimmy rolled to his side to look down at Jake. "You're in love with me?"
"Yeah, you dumb fuck," Jake said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world as he slapped Jimmy on the back of his head. "I know I probably shouldn't say it, but I love you, man. Not just as a brother, which is what makes it even harder. I know it's wrong and you probably thought we were just messing around, and that's cool. I just hope I find a guy someday that's half as understanding and cool as you."
As the sound of a solitary car crossing the bridge above broke through the night, Jimmy stared at Jake in disbelief. What his brother had just said perfectly echoed what he had been feeling. He never imagined that Jake would feel the same things for him that he felt for his oldest brother. They had been messing around for a while, and originally it seemed like it was because they were both horny, curious teens. But when Jake caught him jerking off to gay porn, they grudgingly admitted they were each gay. It remained their secret and, even though they continued to date girls, they found understanding and relief with each other. Initially, Jimmy had assumed that he would eventually find a guy that he could do the same things with that he did with his brother, but he soon realized that no guy would ever measure up to Jake. He didn't have a case of hero worship for his brother, but a deep, full-on love for him and it hurt him just as much believing that Jake didn't feel the same. Despite having heard his brother's declaration, Jimmy worried about Jake's reaction to the words that were about to tumble from his mouth. His voice was soft and hesitant when he said, "I'm in love with you, too. I just didn't think you felt that way."
Jake blinked in surprised. He leaned up and faced Jimmy for a moment then pushed his brother onto his back and rolled on top of him, careful to not kick Jimmy's hat to the ground from where it sat on the edge of the truck bed. He felt Jimmy open his legs to allow his to rest between them, permitting their crotches to press together. "Really? You're not just saying that?"
"No, Jake." Jimmy's voice was stronger this time. "I love you, man. I think I always have and I know I always will. I could settle for a guy like you but my heart wouldn't be in it."
In response, Jake pressed his lips to his brother's and took him in another kiss. It was intense and conveyed the love they had just expressed for each other. Their tongues battled with each other and the both enjoyed the way neither wanted to surrender. Periodically, teeth nibbled at lips and they breathed in each other's heavy, warm breath. When Jake finally broke the kiss and pulled back to look down at his brother, he was sure his face reflected the awe, love and happiness that he saw in Jimmy's.