Sunday March 21
Brenda woke long before the set time on the alarm. She looked over at Ian, who was sleeping on his stomach facing away from her. Poor guy, she thought to herself. She resisted touching him, not wanting to disturb him. I've put him through a lot these past few days, she thought. PMS, guilt, and depression hit her Friday and Saturday and Ian was conveniently there for the show. He handled it as best as he could considering it was his first experience. Brenda's mood swings varied from wanting to be held and cuddled to biting his head off for no apparent reason.
Confused and upset, he left and went to his house to get away for a while on Saturday. He wasn't away long, but it did him good. Normally, Brenda's PMS wasn't too severe. Most of the time, she was merely grouchy. However, with depression hitting her and feeling guilty over her new-found happiness with Ian, she was in rare form. When he returned, they had a long talk, with Brenda trying to describe what she was feeling and Ian trying to comprehend. Mentally exhausted from tiptoeing around her on eggshells, Ian turned in early Saturday evening, leaving Brenda feeling guilty and upset about that too.
Looking out at the dark stillness, she felt better than she had. Still depressed, she no longer felt guilty about being happy with Ian. She felt so sorry for taking everything out on him. Brenda knew that it wasn't fair and it wasn't his fault, but she just couldn't stop being mean. She understood completely when he left, she would have done the same thing. Knowing that her emotions had been on a roller coaster for the past week, she hoped that this was the worst and that she'd be able to control her emotions better the next time.
They hadn't made love for the past two days, either. Ian didn't press the issue when Brenda woke up snarling Friday morning. Nothing kills an erection faster than a tigress with claws and fangs exposed. Brenda missed the closeness but was afraid that her emotions would switch right in the middle of an interlude. She knew that she would be mourning for her parents for a long time and only hoped that she wouldn't take it out on Ian anymore.
Carefully and quietly, Brenda got out of bed and put on her robe over her nightgown. It was only five o'clock, but she was wide awake. They were going to entertain members of her family who had received things from the will. When she wasn't snapping at Ian, they had collected most of the gifts and put them in the formal dining room. Brenda didn't understand the reasoning behind some of the gifts, but she hoped that her family could tell her the story behind it. She also planned to tell them about her adoption, but hadn't decided upon whether or not to say anything about her and Ian's relationship. She didn't want to deny their relationship, yet she wasn't going to tell them that they'd been screwing like bunnies since she found out. Brenda had no idea as to how to approach it and she wanted to ask Ian when he awoke.
Brenda walked to the window and looked out. Her bedroom looked out over the street and she could see a gentle breeze moving the branches to and fro. It was supposed to be a nice day, breezy and sunny with no rain in sight. A beautiful day for a walk in the park, she thought. She began thinking about times when her parents and Ryan would take her to the park and let her play on the slides and swings. Ryan used to push her while she was on the swing making her go high as she laughed and giggled. Her parents would always tell him to ease up, much to her disappointment. She never tired of the swings and slides and would become upset when it was time to go home. Although it was a happy memory, sad tears began to form as she tried to wish them away. They were too strong, however, and she cried as quietly as possible. When she finished, she dried her eyes with her sleeve. When she turned, Ian was looking at her as he lay on his side and supported his head with his hand.
"I didn't wake you, I hope," Brenda said, sniffling.
"No, you didn't wake me," he replied, "it was more like not feeling you next to me. You okay?"
"Oh, just the usual," she said as she walked back to the bed. "I just can't stop feeling sad." She sat down on the bed and looked at him.
"It's going to take time, a long time."
"I know."
Ian didn't know what else to say. He couldn't begin to understand her emotions now, no matter how much she explained them to him. He had never seen this side of her and he couldn't say that it was a pleasant experience. He could handle the depression, he had helped her through that before. The PMS was an absolute mystery to him. He could never remember his mother going through the vicious mood swings that had occurred over the past four days, or maybe she took it out on his father, sparing him. He didn't know.
Brenda removed her robe and climbed back into bed next to Ian. He covered her with the sheet and blanket and drew her close to him. Soon, they fell back asleep with her in his arms.
The alarm woke them two hours later with Brenda still laying against him. She reached over Ian and shut it off. She really didn't want to get up, partly from the depression, but mostly because she felt so safe and secure in Ian's arms. Before she got up, she lay on Ian once more and hugged him tight.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, fighting back tears.
"For what?"
"For being such a bitch lately."
"I hadn't noticed," he replied, grinning.
"Yeah, right."
"Don't worry about it. I'll survive."
"I shouldn't take it out on you. You're the one person who's kept me sane this past week. You're everything to me. I'll try not to do it anymore. I promise."
"Okay."
"I love you so much," she said as she kissed him.
"I love you, too."
Brenda got out of bed and began to take off her nightgown, showing off her taut, shapely figure to him. Wide eyed and grinning, Ian stared at her. Brenda tossed her nightgown to Ian, which he caught neatly.
"Want to take a shower with me?" She asked seductively.
"I won't be able to control myself," he replied as he tossed aside the covers.
"God, I hope not," she giggled as she took his hand and led the way.
The afternoon was pleasant as about twenty guests gathered at the house. Brenda read the will from beginning to end. When she finished reading it, she led them to the dining room where the gifts were laid out.
When they were all there, Brenda said, "I know that there might be some things that you may want that aren't in the will. Please let me know and maybe we can work something out."
Brenda paused for a few moments to collect her thoughts. She continued, "Now, there was another thing that I wanted to say that wasn't in the will. From what my lawyer told me, no one knew about this and mom and dad never told me, although I think they really wanted to someday." Brenda fought to compose herself.
"I'm adopted," she said, finally as looks of shock and then, sympathy, appeared on their faces. "It was quite a shock, believe me, and I'm still not used to it. I don't know why they never told me," she lied, "but that's in the past."
"I have no desire to find my "real" family. Everyone in this room is my family and I need nothing else," she said, looking directly at Ian.
Brenda's Aunt Marie and Uncle Russell were the first to come to her. Marie, with outstretched arms, hugged Brenda tightly. Soon, everyone else gathered around her, showing their support and love. Ian discreetly went to the kitchen and got more soda and beer from the basement refrigerator. When he returned, Brenda was chatting with several people.
While he was placing the drinks and ice on the table, an attractive blonde, Brenda's cousin, Kelly, came upon him. She had been one of the girls who had flirted with him at the funeral.
"So, you're still living here?" she asked.
"Only until school starts again," he replied, not really trusting her. "My folks will be back by then," he added for no particular reason.
"Your parents don't know you're living here?"
"Of course they do," he said.
