I'm not going to sugarcoat this. My grandmother is hot. Do you hear me? H-O-T-hot! When she was just eighteen, she married, got pregnant, and delivered before turning nineteen. Emulating Granma's actions, my mother married at eighteen, got pregnant, and delivered before turning nineteen, so as it stands, my grandmother is thirty-six years older than me, and at my current age of eighteen, she is but fifty-four, but she doesn't look a day over thirty-five.
My mother is a beauty in her own right, but nothing like Granma. Imagine a thirty-five-year-old Marie Osmond with a lithe, fit body and measurements of 34-24-36. Same long, dark hair, same smoky eyes, and same natural sexiness that has caused boners from New York to California. She does CrossFit and parkour to stay in shape, and she's a vegan.
I'm not going to lie to you. I have masturbated while thinking of my grandmother probably over three thousand times. Furthermore, about ninety percent of the time I am having sex with my girlfriend Jenny, I am fantasizing over Granma. In the end, I have always felt guilty, simply because incest is not a natural or decent thing, at least, that's what we were told in church, and even though I no longer go—even though I am now an atheist—that belief concerning incest was so adamantly drilled into me that I cannot help but to still hold true to it.
Granma was wealthy. Granpa was a land developer who was about twenty years older than her. His poor ticker gave out on him one day when he was at work. There was nothing they could do for him. His life insurance policies guaranteed Granma a worry-free future.
Since I was Granma's only grandchild, she lavished me with gifts. For example: For my sixteenth birthday, she bought me a brand-new Mustang convertible. When I turned eighteen, she bought me a Harley, much to the dismay of my parents. Now, seeing as to how I just graduated high school, she announced that her graduation gift to me was to take a me on a one-week cruise of the Mediterranean.
"You think Jenny can come along?" I asked.
"Billy, you will be starting college in the fall, which means I'm not going to be seeing much of you anymore. I just want to spend this last little bit of summer with you before you move on to more important things."
"Granma, nothing will ever be more important than you," I assured her.
She hugged me to her. I felt her firm breasts push against my chest, just as I felt her rock-hard nipples dig into my flesh. I pulled back before an erection could begin. I think she knew that. She smiled, then said, "So what do you say? One last outing with Granma before you hit University Avenue?"
"Yeah, sure thing, Granma."
Now, she told everyone we were going on a Carnivale cruise, so imagine my surprise when she completely bypassed the loading dock for Carnivale and kept on going. "Didn't you just miss your turn?"
She pulled into a parking garage, killed the motor, then smiled. "I lied," she said with a sultry grin. "I'm taking you on the Booze Cruise."
A smile came to my lips, then faltered. "But, I'm not twenty-one, Granma. I won't be able to drink."
Her smile never wavered. She pulled something from her bra and wafted it under my nose. Whatever it was, it was thick with the smell of Far Away. It was the only cologne she would wear, because it was the only cologne I liked. "Go ahead. Take it."
I did, and looked at it. "You had a fake ID made for me?"
"You deserve to cut loose before going off to college, Billy. Besides, this way I can supervise you so you don't get out of control."
I hugged her. "Thanks, Granma." Then, "Damn, you smell good."
"I know, and it's all for my favorite grandson."
"Your
only
grandson," I reminded her.
"Which reminds me. You don't want people knowing that you're here with your grandmother, so just call me Arielle while we're on board, okay?"
"Sure thing, Arielle."
"Good boy. Now come on and let's get boarded. We have a week's worth of drinking to begin."
She had booked us a cabin with two single beds. I was cool with that as the bathroom would give us what privacy we needed when changing clothes. We got settled, then I asked what we should do first. "I don't know about you, but I want to grab some drinks poolside. What do you say?"
"I need to change into my trunks," I said. "Why don't you take the bathroom, and I'll change out here?"
"Sounds good," she said, and grabbed some clothes from her drawer before heading into the bathroom. I was done in under fifteen seconds. Granma, on the other hand, took all of fifteen minutes. "I just had to make sure everything was right," she said with a smile. "Now let's go."
Once poolside, I allowed her to order the drinks since the only alcohol I knew anything about was Budweiser and Boone's Farm Wine. She ordered herself a Fuzzy Navel, and for me, a Tom Collins.
She untied her sarong and pulled her flimsy mesh top off to reveal a tanned body that everyone, male and female alike, took notice of, including me. She dove into the pool, swam a lap up and back, then took her place at the chaise lounge where her drink lay. "Going to get wet?" she asked me after sipping on her drink.
"Sure," I answered. I jumped in, swam as she had, then made to join her, only in my absence, three studly-looking men had made their way to her. I was no slouch. I stood six-two and weighed 225, and I was well-defined from playing sports in high school, but it was apparent that these guys were on a completely different level.
As I approached, I heard one of them ask Granma what she would be doing later. She spied me, then waited for me to get close enough to answer, "I'll be making love with my young stud of a boyfriend all night, so I won't really have time for the likes of you."
They looked at me as I took my place on the chaise next to hers, smiled, and went on their way. "Was that really necessary?"
"I really don't want to be bothered by them, Billy. I'm here to spend time with you and enjoy myself. Believe me, word will get around pretty quick that you and I are an item, and except for the occasional dunce who thinks he has just what I need, they'll leave me alone."
I looked at her and smiled. I took my time turning from her, appreciation the soft sheen of sweat that caused her golden body to glisten in the sunlight.
If only she weren't my Granma
...
The dinner buffet was something straight out of Party Central: About twenty different flavors of chicken wings, onion rings, fries, mozzarella sticks, pizza ... It was like one big frat party or something, considering all the alcohol that was available as well; and the women? Oh, I have never seen such a collection of beautiful, scantily-clad women in my life, and yet, the drunker I got, the more I had to admit that none of them could hold a candle to Granma.
She and I drank, danced, drank, ate, drank, drank, and drank to the point that I lost all comprehension of what was real and what wasn't. For instance, was Granma really making out with that beautiful Asian woman in front of me, or was I really back in my cabin, drunkenly dreaming the whole thing? I really didn't know, and at the moment I really didn't care.
I liked the Tom Collins so much that I had stuck with it the whole night. In fact, I was ordering doubles and throwing them back like they were water. I vaguely remember being helped back to my cabin by two people, but once I entered the room, all else was lost to me. That is, until the following morning.
I awoke to the warmth of a body tightly pressed against mine. I opened my eyes to find my arm was latched onto her, around her waist and on her belly, pulling her close to me. Had I gotten lucky last night? My first thought was of Jenny, but immediately the picture of that Asian woman flashed before my eyes, and I smiled. I reached up, cupped one of her tiny breasts, and whispered, "Good morning, beautiful."
"Good morning, yourself," she said as she turned, and before I could react, her lips were upon mine.
I jumped up. "G-Granma?"
"Oh, Billy," she said with a smile borne of purest satisfaction. "You were so wonderful last night. I never knew just how turned on I have made you all these years."
"No," I said, denying this inevitable truth. "Unh-uh. No. We didn't have sex."
"Sex?" Granma questioned. "Dare we even call it that? Billy, you made love to me so sweetly last night, and told me just how much you loved me and desired me as a woman ... How long have you been in love with me, Billy?"
"No. NO," I repeated. "That didn't happen, Granma. We were drunk. You dreamed it, that's all."
"Billy. Please. Don't."
"It's wrong," I said to her. "Incest is wrong. I would never do that. I love you too much as my Granma to do that with you."
"And yet, you told me last night that that was the
very
reason you were doing it."
"No," I said again, then went to get a shower. I guess I thought that I could wash it all away, but when I came back into the room and saw her sitting up in her bed, bare breasts exposed, I knew no amount of water could cleanse me. I sat on my bed and hung my head.
"It's really okay," Granma said to me. "No one will ever know, Billy. I promise."
"Know what?" I asked in full denial. "Nothing happened."
She shook her head. "Okay. Nothing happened. It was all just a practical joke. There. Happy? Maybe we should say that you got lucky with someone else, and after showing her out last night, you mistakenly fell into my bed. How is that? Does that work better for you?"
"I would never cheat on Jenny," I told her.
She threw her hands up in the air. "I'm going to shower and then get some breakfast. You coming, or are you going to mope in here all day trying to convince yourself that what really happened, hadn't?" The question was rhetorical, for she immediately made her way into the bathroom, and a moment later the shower was running.
She ate some fruit while I had scrambled eggs and bacon. She suggested I try a Screwdriver, and we both washed down breakfast with several. We went back to the pool and spent a few hours there before finding our way to a game of darts, billiards, shuffleboard, and even an arcade with a lot of old-school, eighties video games, and yes, the Screwdrivers continued to flow.
I had a Black N Bleu burger and fries for lunch, and Granma had a grilled chicken Caesar salad. We went back to the pool afterward, and continued down this dark road of Screwdriver City. By dinnertime, I was so wasted that I could barely stand. "Go on without me," I told her. "I really need to sleep this off." That was at five o'clock. She burst back into the cabin after midnight, awakening me immediately.
"B-B-B-Billy," she said as the light came on. I looked up and shielded my eyes from the instantaneous transformation from pitch black to brightest light. I must have passed out before Granma left earlier, for I didn't remember her wearing this black, sequined, flapper-style mini-dress she now sported. I had to admit, she was quite beautiful in it. I then noticed she was crying. I mean, really, really crying. Tears were flowing down her cheeks and she was so distraught that her breath was catching, making her stutter her words.
"Granma, what's wrong?" I asked as I sat up. My immediate thought was, "Did someone say or do anything inappropriate to you?"
O-o-o-o-h-h-h-h, B-B-B-Billy," she said as she made her way to her bed. She kicked off her shoes, then let her dress fall to the floor before jumping in her bed and facing me.
