The house was filled with people, family and friends, all there to help celebrate our birthdays. I was turning thirty, that big hurdle from young adult to grown man, and my father-in-law was turning fifty. It had always been kind of fun sharing birthdays with him. It always turned into a big bash with lots of drinking and horsing around. My father-in-law, Jeff was quite the character, constantly cracking jokes, and making wise comments about his wife, Sandy. She was no slouch herself firing back as good as she got. At times the comments got a bit raw, but it was all in fun. My wife Karen, on the other hand, was a bit of a prude. She would get offended at off color comments, and go on a tirade. It wasn't one of her better traits. Actually most of her better traits stayed in the bedroom. It was like she changed into a different woman once the door was closed and the lights were off.
Other than the personality differences, Sandy and Karen were almost identical; same long dark hair, slender upturned noses, and big brown eyes that could melt your heart. They were within an inch of each other in height, at five foot three, and constantly battled over who weighed more, at one hundred and ten pounds. In fact, if the lights were low, you would think they were twins not mother and daughter. It was something Sandy had used on more than one occasion.
So, the party was in full swing, music playing loudly, and everyone milling about, drinking and eating cake. Jeff and I were standing on the back deck, having a deep conversation about whether or not the neighbor, Judy, was wearing panties. You know, the kind of male bonding you would expect at a birthday party.
"Why don't I just ask her, then." he said, after my insisting that any panties would surely show a line through the skin tight shorts she was wearing.
Before I could interrupt, he was shouting down to her.
"So Judy, Brian thinks you're going commando, and I say it's a thong. Who wins?" he shouted out, just as both of our wives stepped onto the deck.
Karen scowled, while Sandy let out a laugh.
"So which is it, Judy?" Sandy yelled out, joining us at the rail.
To all of our surprise, Judy laughed turned around and dropped her shorts, revealing her bare ass, unfettered by any restraints.
"You win." Sandy laughed, nudging me in the ribs.
"We both won." Jeff added, slapping his wife playfully on the ass.
"I think that's enough." Karen said, moving up beside me slipping her arm around my waist and steering me from the railing. "She's such a tramp."
I glanced over at Jeff, who was smiling wickedly and making a gesture of grabbing a handful.
"I saw that, Dad." Karen said, still half dragging me back toward the house. "Let's go inside. It's time you guys opened your gifts."
We walked into the living room, and the women guided each of us to recliners as they shouted that it was time to open gifts. The room was filled with people as the women brought over gifts and piled them in our laps. It was by tradition gag gifts, trinkets and things, nothing elaborate. The typical nipple mugs, back scratchers, men's panty hose. It was all about the laughs, and once in a while something new. We had gotten through most of our gifts, and I was just opening an envelope.
"I, uhm... that's for Jeff." Sandy said reaching for the envelope.
"Too late." Jeff said grabbing her hand. "He's got it now."
"But, uhm ..." she replied, her face turning red.
"Oh, it must be good." Jeff said, "Go ahead, Brian. Guess you're in for a treat."
I looked from Jeff to Sandy, then to Karen. Jeff nodded his head vigorously, Sandy shrugged, then gave a single nod. Karen scowled and reached for the envelope.
"Two to one, its mine." I shouted triumphantly, as I tore open the envelope.
A photograph fell out onto my lap. I picked it up. It was a photo of Sandy in a negligee'. Written across the bottom were the words, "Your choice, one time, anywhere!" I picked up the photo, and held it out to Jeff.
"I think this really is for you." I said, keeping the image face down.
"Oh, no!" he replied, holding his hands up and laughing. "You said it, two to one, it's yours."
"But, uhm ..." I started, trying not to make any more of a deal of it than it had already become.
"Let me see that!" Karen growled, snatching the photo from my hand.
Her face went white as she looked at the picture. She threw it at her mom, and turned around to face me and her father.
"That's gross." she growled, ignoring her father's laughter.
The laughter seemed only to anger her further, and she began yelling for everyone to get out. As her tirade spiraled out of control, I got up and moved amongst our friends, apologizing and thanking them for coming. All the while Karen was yelling, first at our guests, and then at her own mother and father. As the last of the guests left, I stood at the door, considering for a moment that I might go with them.
I reluctantly walked back into the living room. Jeff was still sitting in the chair. Sandy and Karen were standing in the middle of the room. Karen still ranting over the photograph, while her mother just stood there smiling. As started across the room Karen turned and stared at me.
"For Christ sake Karen, it was just a picture, and it wasn't even intended for him." Sandy said, her voice getting louder with each word.
"Yeah, right." Karen replied, glancing from her mother to me and back. " I see the way you look at him. You're nothing but a tramp."
"Look." Sandy responded her face showing the anger, "If I wanted to fuck your husband I would certainly not broadcast it in front of the whole neighborhood. I'd just grab him and haul him off to a bedroom and screw his brains out!"
"You, you, you wouldn't dare!" Karen yelled, her hands clenching and unclenching at her sides.
"Alright, that's enough." Jeff said, starting to rise from his seat.
"Stay out of this." Both women shouted before turning back to stare at each other.
"Like I said, if I wanted him, I'd just take him." Sandy said, glancing over at me.
