Best Since My Brother
I wasn't really watching TV. It was just on. One of those detective reruns was playing. It was "Law & Order" or "CSI" or something like that. Out of the corner of my ear (how's that for a mixed up metaphor?) I heard:
"It was the best sex since my brother right after high school."
Did I really hear that? I think so.
It brought back memories of my sister – the one I had sex with in high school.
How long ago was that? Fifteen, sixteen, twenty years? It must have been twenty years. I was 18 then, and am 38 now. I have had some pretty good sex since then, but that first time sure has been a favorite memory.
On an impulse I called my sister, AliciaJane. A. J. and I talk on the phone every couple of weeks. We get together only once or twice each year. A birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and maybe the Fourth of July are the favored meeting events.
It's a seven and a half hour drive between our homes. She lives in Fargo, North Dakota and I have my home near Lincoln, Nebraska. Before you even ask, no, I am not a Husker fan. I don't even like sports.
"Hello," a man answered my call.
"Hi, Joe, can I talk with my sister?"
Joe is A. J.'s second husband. They were married about two years after A. J's first marriage fell apart. She doesn't talk about it very much, and I have no clue as to what went wrong. Mark, that's the first husband, moved away before the divorce was final. His company opened a branch office someplace in South Dakota, I guess, and he transferred to it.
Joe seems to be a nice guy, and he appears to be devoted to A. J., but somehow I get some disturbing vibes. I think Joe is what some call a player. A player is a guy who likes to play with a lot of different women. By play, I mean fuck. I have no proof, just suspicions.
For example, Joe and I had a few beers at one Fourth of July picnic. We talked about a lot of bull stuff including women and affairs.
He remarked, "I wouldn't dare get caught cheating on A. J. She'd bash my head in with a skillet!"
I found that to be suspicious. He didn't say 'I wouldn't dare cheat.' He said 'I wouldn't dare get caught.' I sure hope Joe isn't cheating on A. J. It would break my big sister in two.
I heard Joe holler, "Yo, A. J! Your brother's on the phone."
"M. J., here she comes. I am going out to the garage to clean some spark plugs. Are you and A. J. gonna plan a Thanksgiving get together? Here she is. Bye now."
A. J. came on the line "Hi, there, little brother. I was just thinking about you."
"Good thoughts, I hope."
"Good memories are more like it. I just heard some woman on TV say something about having the best sex since high school."
"Wow, A. J., if it was sex with her brother then I heard the same thing. That's what prompted me to call," I whispered.
AliciaJane replied, "No need to whisper. Joe's out in the garage."
I said, "I have fond memories of that day. I have to confess that I have had some pretty good sex since then, but being with you is still the most special."
"I can't believe we are talking about this after so many years," A. J. added, "I don't think we ever mentioned it after that. Well, except for the time a few months later when you wanted to do it again."
"You turned me down that time. You said we should wait awhile because you were having your period," was my response. "I have been waiting a long while. Tee hee."
"Hey, brother, are you hinting something?"
"Maybe so, sister, and what do you mean we haven't mentioned it? What do you call those 'happy anniversary' phone calls on June 14th?"
She giggled, "Oh, that's the anniversary you celebrate! Tee hee. If you didn't call I would probably still remember Junel 14, and not because it's Flag Day, either. Obviously you remember the date, too"
"How could any guy not remember being an eightteen year old boy and enjoying his first time, especially with since it was with a special big sister? I noticed you didn't say 'no way' when I hinted about the repeat being way past due!"
Hey, brother, you are tempting me. Maybe I am entitled to some fun, and I can't think of a better person for it than you. M. J., I don't have proof, but I think Joe has been getting some fun on the side. He's probably banging mothers of his taekwondo students. Maybe it's my turn to step out."
My little brain, the one I keep in my pants, suddenly became alert. It sprang to attention. Is my sister just teasing me, or is there a chance of another memorable incest session?
She continued, "Actually, M. J., I was getting ready to call you --not about the TV show -- but about Thanksgiving Day. Do you have any plans yet?"
"No, but I was thinking of inviting you and Joe to come down to Nebraska, and bring Mom along. I think it's my turn to host."
"That would be nice, but Joe is scheduled to work on Black Friday. That would make for a hurried trip. Besides that, Mom doesn't like riding in the car for so long. So, dear brother, this is an official invitation for you to come here. Joe already said it was OK with him. He said he would even stock up on Samuel Adams Boston Ale, your favorite brew. I suppose we could even put some clean sheets on the bed in the guest room."
"That would be great, sis, I probably could take off from work early on Wednesday and be in Fargo in time for the late news on TV. Can I stay through Saturday afternoon?"
"You bet."
Four or so inches of snow fell overnight. Joe shoveled the driveway and the sidewalk on the morning of Thanksgiving while I helped A. J. in the kitchen. She put me in charge of cutting carrots, celery, and stuff for what I liked to call the "Whore – de – vor" plate. Later, I had the fun of mashing up potatoes. Well, OK, I used the mixer instead of a masher. It was fun anyway.
Thanksgiving Day is a family day; duh, we all know that, don't we? The family at our get together was me, my sister, our mother, Joe, Joe's sister (Mary), and her husband (William). Joe's parents became snowbirds and had their Thanksgiving by themselves in Texas. No snow in Texas.
Did we eat too much? Of course we did. Later the women did kitchen duty while the men watched football. The game couldn't hold my interest; I don't care much for watching sports. So, I wandered into the kitchen to help with the clean up.
My appearance apparently put a damper on the girl conversation. The chit chat quit as soon as they saw me.
I enjoyed what I saw. Now, my mother is a fine looking woman, but she's too old for me, and she is my mother. I didn't look much at her, but the other two were samples of the finest of sexy women folk. I don't know which is sexier, AliciaJane or Mary. Both have appealing attributes. A. J. at five foot seven was taller and slimmer but the boobs on her had a 'come caress me' look about them. Mary, on the other hand, is probably what they call petite because she's short. Yikes, though, those legs! My mind's eye unpeeled her pants until nothing but gorgeous firm leg topped by bikini panty showed. Put A.J.'s top with Mary's bottom and you would have the perfect ten. Did I lust? Does it snow in the Dakotas? You bet I lusted.
"How can I help?" I offered.
"Too late there, brother-in-law M. J.," said Mary, "We are just about done."
"Here," said A. J. "Take this dishtowel and finish drying. I think Mary wants to go snuggle up to her hubby and watch the rest of the game."
"Okey, dokey, sister,"
Mom joined in, "M. J., as soon as we are done will you take me home?"
"It would be my pleasure."
