My Aunt Paula was what you'd call a spinster, never having married, but I never knew why. She was slim, 5 feet 6 inches tall, with fair hair that started off straight then developed into curls at her neckline. She had scorching blue eyes, high cheekbones and full, sensuous lips.
Her hips were a little wide, but her rounded bum and shaped thighs in jeans could turn any man's head. Smallish breasts, B-cups, sat above a tummy that had just enough flesh to make sure her hips were not bony.
And I lusted after her. At 22 years of age, I moved back into her town after living interstate. I hadn't given her much thought recently, until I bumped into her in the pub. She'd been drinking, and I don't think she saw me at first.
She was flirting with a couple of guys and it got out of hand. They tried to get their hands up her skirt while she stood at the bar, I went over and showed them the error of their ways by giving them both split lips. Then Paula realised who I was.
"Oh Davey. Um, thanks babe. None of these other bastards were going to help."
"Wanna get home, Paula?"
"That's Aunt Paula, young man!"
"Piss off, I haven't called you 'aunt' in years. And this 'young man' just scraped knuckles for you!"
"Yeah, fair point. OK, take me home, please?"
I'd only had one beer so I drove her to her fifth-floor flat. On the way I couldn't help noticing that her white skirt had drifted way up her thighs - so far that another two inches would have showed me what colour panties she wore. The occasional sideways glance proved she was still a very pretty woman at forty-four.
I went with her in the lift to make sure she got inside safely.
"Come in and have a drink. Tell me what you've been doing these few years..."
We talked a while, she didn't drink much more but I had a few and after a while I was pretty loose.
Dave, you got a girlfriend?"
"Nobody regular. You got a man?"
"Hah! No. Nobody for ages. Can't seem to find one that knows how to treat a woman like a woman.an."
"Yeah, lots of blokes can't treat a lady right."
"No, not a lady. A woman. Get my meaning?"
"Oh, er yeah, I guess."
"You guess?! Do you know how to treat a woman, Davey?"
She had always called me 'Davey' when she was teasing me. So I figured she was teasing me now. The drinks gave me courage.
"Yep. If only you knew, dear auntie, if only you knew!"
"Oooh, do you now?"
Sitting opposite me on the couch, her legs parted slightly. So slightly that I didn't know if it was deliberate. But then, it wouldn't be the first time she'd flashed me...
I took another sip of her fine whisky.
"Heck yes. After one night with me I have to leave town to avoid them!"
"Hah hah." She looked at me over her glass as she took sip of her wine. I saw a flash of something in her eyes, as if she was weighing up where to go next. She made up her mind. Standing a little uncertainly, she walked over to my armchair and sat on my lap.
"So, little Davey. Do you still fancy your auntie?"
"Jeez, Paula. You're a bit drunk and I..."
"Not that drunk. I still remember how you sneaked peeks at me."
"Yeah, not sure how much I 'sneaked a peek' and how much you teased me."
"Am I teasing you now?"
"You know what, I just might call your bluff."
She laughed and got up off my lap. I figured it was the end of another tease until she stopped a few feet away, pulled her skirt up a little to show me her lovey rounded butt nestled in light blue satin panties.
"Like this, Davey?"
"Paula, any minute now you're gonna have to put up or shut up."
I was smiling but my tone was serious. My aunt had got me horny without even trying. She bent slightly to show a little more of her butt and now a little of the strip of fabric between her lovely thighs:
"Tick tock, tick tock. Is that minute up yet?"
I hesitated. If she wasn't a blood relative - my father's sister - I'd have her in my arms by now. So I decided to test how far she would go.
"OK, look. Let's just say you tease me and I react. If nothing happens you get a giggle but I go home frustrated and no doubt you'll do it again next time. You always did. Or, if something did happen, later we'd regret it."
"Why 'regret'?"
"OK you fox, I'll play your game. Because despite being one of the sexiest women I've known, and despite having fantasised about you a dozen times, YOU ARE MY DAD'S SISTER!"
"Oh, a dozen times huh? I'm flattered!"
"Paula, you always could get my blood boiling. Please, don't tease me just because you can. You've had a bit to drink so maybe you went too far. OK?"
"OK Dave. No more teasing. Look, you've drunk almost half a bottle of my expensive Irish whisky. Don't drive home, OK? Stay here."
"Um, OK. Thanks. I'm just going to the loo, back in a sec. Let's finish the bottle and talk shit for the rest of the night!"
I went to the bathroom and when I returned Paula had poured a very large whisky for me over a heap of ice, and a smaller one for herself.
For the next hour we talked about all kinds of rubbish, and by then I was pretty sloshed although my aunt seemed to have held her drink well.
I couldn't stop my mind from returning to the image of her light blue panties flashing at me. Despite the whisky I had an erection. This time it was me that started the teasing.
"What would you have done if I'd called your bluff before?"
"I didn't think you would. That's why I kept it up."
"Why did you think I wouldn't?"
"Cos you never did. Not even at Andrew's wedding. Remember?"
It flooded back. Paula was my first-ever tongue kiss, I was barely 18 at the time. It came about like this: At the wedding party, late in the evening after much boozing in the garden at the reception place, the traditional family raucous teasing and dares had been going for a while and getting naughtier all the time. It started, as usual, with such tried and tested laughter-generators as trying to drink standing on one leg, trying to lift fat Aunt Vera off her feet from behind (we all could, but she sooo loved getting felt up by all the family). Then my cousin Lynn dared Paula to give me "A lesson in hot kissing", a dare she needed little persuasion to accept.
Auntie Paula playfully and exaggeratedly put one, then the other arm over my shoulders, pulled me slowly towards her, sexily hooked one leg around my thigh (wolf-whistles for that move), tilted her head up to meet mine and inclined it slightly, and pecked me briefly on the lips. We two smiled at our joke while the onlookers howled and booed.
Of course she wasn't done. When she did it properly, I tasted her sweet lips with a hint of white wine in a full mouth-kiss, our tongues twirling, she biting my lower lip and showing me how to reciprocate. I learned everything I know about erotic kissing in those ten seconds.
When we separated to applause and raucous laughter, she noted the boner I had and mercifully allowed me to put my arms around her from beside and behind as if it were just a family hug, thus hiding it from gaze.
Attention in the festivities shifted to my cousin Jackie who was dared to lapdance for grandpa. He loved it of course, but the joke is that cousin Jackie is butch lesbian.
As we watched, Auntie Paula reached back and gave my trapped dick a long squeeze. I wasn't expecting it and flinched, but she just giggled and moved away. I sat down to cover my embarrassing situation.
Now I quizzed her some more.
"At Andrew's wedding I couldn't have got anywhere with a stranger let alone my aunt."
"Why not?"
"Would you have let me?"