I have wanted to make love to my mother for the last 25 years. I am 45 and my mother is 65. Although she has long been a grandmother and well into her "older years", she is fit and still remains a sexy woman who entices the most erotic fantasies for me. I was married for 20 years and had a son, but the marriage was not good, and doomed from the start. My mother also divorced my father 10 years ago in a surprise to all the family.
I am not sure if the bad marriage helped fuel my incestuous lust, but I do know that most of the time I fucked my ex-wife, I was fantasizing about my mother. I have had 4-5 affairs since the divorce 3 years ago, and although 2 of these women (including my current lover) were absolute knockouts & half my age, I still often fantasized about seducing my mother!
I used to believe this incestuous lust was only because I was not getting enough (or any, when a teenager) sex, but since I now fuck my 23 year old girlfriend 6-10 times a week, I am now sure it is a desire and need that will never go away.
On my last trip home, I was to find my desires so powerful that it was time to play on them and see what would happen. In past visits, my mother was always very proper and the only things she did that fueled my lust, I assume where innocent and meaningless. She would dress for bed in a light half gown, which I would get to see when she moved from her bedroom to the bathroom. I always thought it strange that she let me see this and wished I could make this a case of her trying to seduce me. She also would occasionally ask me things like memories about our first house, such as asking me if I remember the upstairs bathroom, (where I first saw her naked) but then only asked if I remembered the remodeling job we had done on it. Was this an attempt on her behalf to see if I would bring up the wonderful sight I had of her in the tub? I always told myself I was reading things into her innocent acts and comments.
As my mother never dated after the divorce, I once asked her years ago if she didn't miss being held and kissed, and she blushed and quickly replied no and changed the subject. At the announcement of their pending divorce, my father had told my older brother, who confided to me, that my mother did not like sex and that my father left because he needed more love in his life. This did not support my fantasy of seducing my mother, but I always used it to my advantage as in fanaticizing that I could make her love sex, or my father was not a good, considerate lover as I would be. In thinking about my mother's innocent questions and night dress, I often had to dismiss any possibility that she would want her son due to the "cold wife" comment made by my father, and her statement that she did not miss hugs and kisses. Lately though, I have begun to wonder if her subtle actions and the quick and embarrassed reply to my question of holding and kissing may not have been her refusal to admit to me that she did want to held and kissed, and by me!
I arrived at her house after not seeing her for over a year due to my overseas assignment. Of course we hugged and kissed the way mother and son usually would, but I did start to get hard at the feeling of her in my arms, and I wondered if she noticed. I tried to keep my hips away from hers to keep from being blatant about my desires. We settled in for a seemingly normal visit, except for my plans for some very subtle testing of the feeling I might draw from her.
I had found a book on psychology that had some large sections on incest, and brought it to fuel some discussion on this subject if the time and atmosphere seemed right. I commented on my mother's beauty and fitness many times in the first couple of days. She accepted the comments well and seemed pleased. I then worked my way into a conversation on her being alone all the time and how I wished she had remarried or had boyfriends. She scoffed this off and said she was happy. I then told her that if she had been my wife, I would not have let her go and that I would have made her so happy, she would die at the thought of being alone. She smiled and only replied that she thought that was probably true. I wanted to take her right then and show her, but it was all still simple and innocent discussions.
Later we talked about my post divorce life and she asked about my very young lovers. I replied that the two young ladies were indeed very sexy and pleased me, but the best (this is true) was actually the 55-year-old Swedish woman I had dated for about 6 months. She was surprised at this and asked some details on the woman and of our time together. I told her that this woman played no games and was the most beautiful lady I had ever made love to due to her mature and self-confident nature. My mother seemed genuinely interested in this particular affair. I was, as always, struggling to read my mother's mind and not play erroneously into anything out of lust.
After the first two days of our usual bantering and getting to know one another again, I decided it was time to push this to a new level. I sat in her living room reading the Psychology book, knowing she would ask what I was interested in now. My family knew I always read the widest range of topics and I actually subscribed to "Psychology Today" magazine for years. This book was not an unusual book for me to read, but I also knew, that she would ask what I was reading about if only out of the desire for conversation.
Finally she asked, and I replied that I was just reading the whole book but at this point I was on a section about incest. She looked embarrassed and just responded "Oh". I was not to let this end though. I let the silence sink in for a few minutes, hoping that her mind might wander in what I consider the right direction. Then I looked up and asked her if I could ask her opinions on some facts I just read. She looked a bit uncomfortable, but of course told me to go ahead.
I told he that according to the text, all children and parents thought about incest at one time or another, and did she think that was true. She squirmed a bit and said she doubted that "all" did, but probably many did. I let that drop for now and moved on to sharing some statistics with her. I told her that the text advised that the strongest attractions were between young boys and their mothers. She perked up at that and replied "really?" I was not prepared for her question that followed, "Did you feel that when you were young?" I looked at her and smiled, and told her that I did and that it was a very strong desire. She smiled pleasantly and said "that's sweet"!
I was now motivated and moved on to new areas to play and test. I told her that the experts advised that incest could be particularly damaging if forced, or if the child as too young to understand the significance and social implications. I further told her that they found that if the physical and mental age were "appropriate" then there was no evidence that incest was harmful and actually was a healthy and loving action between "adult" participants. I continued that studies had shown many mothers and sons and had relationships well into their middle age period that appeared to be nurturing and happy. Mother seemed to be listening intently and lost in thought while absorbing this info.
I told her I found this very curious and interesting and asked her again if I could get her opinions. Again she agreed, although I could see she had an idea what the questions were to be and was not real comfortable with this.
I decided to go for the gold, and I asked her if she ever thought about her two sons in this way. She looked at me and said that she was like most woman and had fleeting thoughts, but she would always banish them from her head and felt ashamed whenever the thoughts came to her. I pressed a bit harder, and asked when she last thought about me making love to her. She blushed and only replied that she did not want to discuss that intimate of a detail.
Not expecting this to go much further, but deciding that I had her thinking and wanting her to think more about this later, I decided to get us on a closing line of thought that would be the most provocative for her if the idea was ever to be one she would consider.
