"Be my Queen..." He said to me, I looked up because he towered over me, it really did hurt to look at him sometimes because even if he was opaque compared to the world that I belonged to he always tried his best to be there black umbrella in hand, sunscreen on his pale milky skin, and dark mysterious air which was begrudgingly the thing that I loved the most about him.
He was the culmination of Daddy and Mommy problems added with sibling problems, he reminded me of me.
"I want to be yours..." He went on, I was in shock, how, what?
My brain went blank. It felt as deep as the Pacific Ocean but I was not from the Pacific but Passaic. I sucked on my Ambrosia shake, he thought I did not know what I was doing but I knew exactly that his Mango Lassi Ambrosia shake which he had prepared for me in the kitchen he randomly conjured up in this dark room which reminded me of the Room of Requirement from Harry Potter.
I was taken there after I made it. I ended up pinpointing the odd strange man that moved to my town after that Jack Black movie Be Kind Rewind was filmed in my local library. He moved the next day after the filming of the movie. I saw him in the library and found him peculiar and strange.
I understood that he was not human when he walked across the first floor without making a single sound as he glided across the floor and he tossed his hair every so often and looked like he was breathing on a timer every 3 minutes he made his lungs rise in a way that was unnatural and I hate to admit it but I became attracted to his oddness to his choice in books. He went to the older tomes in the nonfiction section.
I hate to admit it but I loved following him, he came every day like clock work 4 minutes after the library opened and I just observed him as I hid behind the counter helping the patrons that frequented the library, the traffic did become bigger but not as big as it was expected after a Jack Black movie that was filmed in your town by a French Director and the closeness to NYC and the fact we can see the city from our downtown we somehow felt connected to the pain that happened in 2001 it had been been only 7 years and well it felt like the world was finally going to do what the body does after 7 years with its cells but that doesn't mean we do not forget what happened, no, but rebuild and get inspired to build bigger and make a world that the dead could be proud but what do the fuck do I know I am just a librarian that gets high on the smell on old books and trees, but now this man whose name I did end up finding out when he was forced to sign up for a library card but the thing is that he acts like he never heard of what a library card is then I remembered what my heart and my gut have been telling me all along.
I was face to face with a Kami of some sort, some sort of God, Demon, Angelic, divine being but based on the clues that I got after I took his wallet from him because he did not know which one was his ID, he mentioned his assistant must have put it in his purse. Guys, he called it a PURSE! I understood then that this man was not an English native speaker even though he looked like he fit the bill.
He must be one of those exotic white people, my brain thought. Me being Chicana, Mexican American was raised basically in a land close to NYC that was filled with minorities and according to my aunt when she came from Mexico it was not as easy to not speak English as it is now. I remembered how hard I worked to study English after 9/11 I was so scared to live in that area that I worked really hard to learn English to get out of that area but yet it is 2008 and I am still here even Jack Black came here and filmed a movie but I have not been able to just say good bye to Passaic I guess I will just stay here until the apocalypse.
" What if that apocalypse came to find you?" He said as I held the library card that I was trying to hand him some time had passed since I took his information from his wallet, it was odd and not lived in as if he never took it out as if it was a prop. I waited for him to take the card from me but he was not paying attention to my hand but he did not break eye contact with me. I cleared my throat. He snapped out of it and came to reality the way he was looking at me though it was not creepy it was with longing yes but it was also tender and loving. No one in this life has ever looked at me with that devotion and that admiration but the this is I do not know this guy and I decided to totally ignore the question but I felt a pull from him and I moved my hand away quickly and the card fell on the counter, it was a metal card and it made a haunting sound as it made contact with the floor, the sound echoed through the library.
"You did not answer my question." He said curtly as I was trying to esquivar his eyes that were constantly tracking me as if I was some sort of rabbit that he was in the hunt for and I knew it wasn't no Elmer Fudd type of huntin' goin' around here but the Playboy Bunny type and do not get me wrong I would love to get to know the guy he is incredible looking but that was the issue!
He was not a human walking in a human suit and looking at me like I was his bride to be and he thought that I was not going to be able to tell that I was standing in front of a very very old spirit and yet I did not feel fear from him unlike I did from other darker spirits instead this was sadness, he was a whole big sad emo boy that I wanted to mend.
Oh, fuck me. I am dead.
