It was a hot summer day and I was home from college for the summer. My parents had been divorced since I was nine and my sister had moved out a long time ago so it was just my Mom and I. My Mom is forty years old (she was thirty six then)Her name is Daisy and she is still one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen. She has brown hair beautiful green eyes and a body to die for.
I had just finished my breakfast and decided to give Mom breakfast in bed. I had cooked eggs and toast and was carrying the plate into Mom with a juice box (we had ran out of fresh orange juice and it was the next best thing)
I opened the door and found Mom completely naked lying on her bed just waking up. I just stood there with my mouth gaping in awe of what I was looking at and quickly shut it when I realized what was going on. She looked up and saw me, screamed and grabbed the sheet. She pulled the sheet over her beautiful body and yelled at me at the top of her lungs " Goddammit Nick, Get Out! Get Out!" I quickly set down the breakfast tray and got out of her room.
As I closed the door behind me I turned around and said "Mom I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to see anything." she yelled back at me "Nick Goddamit just Get Out! I hate you" I could hear her sobbing as I stood at the door stunned. I went to my room on wobbly legs and wrote her a note.
Dear Mom
I really am sorry. I understand your feelings and I will respect them. I hope that sometime in the future you can forgive me for violating your privacy and your space. I know you don't like people in your room. I just thought I would do something nice for you. I love you very much and I didn't mean you any harm. Please forgive me.
Love Nick
I put my camping gear in the trunk of my car (I always leave my gear packed because I camp a lot) grabbed some clothes and toiletries, put my bike on the back of the car and left. On my way out of town I stopped at my best friend George's house and told him that I was going to go camping in the mountains probably up past White Pass. I told him he could join me if he wanted. He said he'd be working until Friday and then he'd come join me.
I drove up into the mountains by myself and a deep depression rolled over me. Mom had said she hated me. Mom had hardly ever yelled at me and now she threw me out and said she hated me. After driving for several hours I finally reached the campground. I got out set up camp and made myself dinner from some groceries I had bought on the way up the pass. I tried reading a book by the light of the lantern but my mind kept wandering over what my mother had said. I also kept seeing the image of her naked body just sprawled on her bed. Around 2:30 in the morning I finally got to sleep.
I woke up around 7:45 the next morning and then spent the day doing some rock climbing and bicycling. I spent the evening playing rummy with a retired couple at the other end of the campground. (the only other people in the campground as white pass usually doesn't get a lot of campers) I then returned to my own campsite and spent another night tossing and turning.
The next morning I rolled out of my tent around the same time and spent the rest of the day hiking. I couldn't get Mom's voice out of my head yelling at me to just get out. And to top off I kept having visions of her beautiful body. I stepped up my pace and took the most grueling trails the rest of the day just trying to make myself so tired I'd forget about it.
By the time I got back to my campsite I was exhausted. I noticed the old couple had left and I felt completely alone. More alone then I had ever felt in my life. I realized that I had probably ruined my relationship with my Mom and all because I had broken her one rule. To stay out of her room. Mom had always been a private person and I rarely ever went into her room. I don't know what her reasons were but I knew to stay out. I just was trying to be nice and wasn't thinking about it. I should have known better.
As I was cooking myself some steak and some scalloped potatoes on the camp stove I heard a car pull into the campground. I watched the headlights turn into a campsite at the other end and turned back to my cooking. I walked over to the river (about twenty feet from my camp site) and scooped up some water to warm on the stove.
I was just finishing my dinner and getting ready to wash my dishes when I heard my mother's voice behind me "Nick?" I stood up and turned around. I saw my mother standing just at the edge of the firelight. "Mom?" I sputtered out "What are you doing here?" She stepped closer and said "George told me where to find you." I took a step away from her and stopped, suddenly angry with her for throwing me out. She stepped closer and said "Nick?" I turned and started to walk away. "Nick. Stop please. Don't leave O.K." Her voice sounded desperate. I turned looked at her and said "Isn't that what you want. You told me to get out and I did. You said you hated me" She looked at me with tears in her eyes and said "Nick I'm sorry I said that. I didn't mean that. I was just angry and embarrassed. I want you to come home. Nick, honey I love you and I'm so sorry I ever said otherwise I've never felt so bad in my whole life."
I walked back over to her and took her in my arms. She looked up at me and I wiped the tears from her cheeks. She smiled at me and said "I'm sorry I'm just so ashamed of my body and when you saw me naked it was really embarrassing. I held her back at arms length and said "Mom, you don't have anything to be ashamed of. I think you should be proud of your body. You look better than most girls my age! Mom your beautiful." Mom looked at me and asked "Really?" I said "Mom I wouldn't lie to you." She just looked at me and smiled.
I fixed her some dinner and then started to pack up my gear. When she saw me packing she asked "Nick. What are you doing? I said "Well Mom, all I have is one sleeping bag and mattress. I mean it's big enough but I didn't think you'd wanna share. I can sleep in my car if you wanna stay though." She said she did and we sat quietly around the fire still feeling a little awkward. We eventually started talking to each other and a couple hours later had things patched up. Eventually we both started getting tired and I said I was going to bed.
I got up, kissed her goodnight and turned to go to my car. Mom grabbed my wrist and stood up. She looked into my eyes and said "Nick don't sleep in your car. I want you close to me. We've been separated to much lately and I feel so bad. Will you sleep with me in the tent? Please? I looked at her and said "O.K. Mom."
We crawled into the deluxe size sleeping bag together and I turned down the lantern. Mom asked me to leave it on a little so I did. I turned over and noticed Mom was looking at me. "What is it?" I asked her. She looked over and said "Nick I'm really sorry if I hurt your feelings. I didn't mean it. I have to tell you something really important. Do you promise not to get upset?" I looked at her and said "Sure Mom."
She said O.K. Nick here it is. Your Father and I adopted you when you were two years old. Your real mother died when you were a year old. Your father as you know is older than I am and he had quite a bit of money so we didn't have a lot of trouble with the proceedings and the paperwork. I'm sorry I should have told you a long time ago but I was afraid you wouldn't love me anymore. That's why I never let you in my room I didn't want you to find the papers." She continued "Nick I'm sorry please don't hate me. I love you so much." She started to cry. I just lay there staring at her blank-faced and stunned. She started crying harder when she saw the look on my face.
After about fifteen minutes I finally got my mind around what she had said and realized I really didn't care. I looked at her and put my arm around her I said "Mom it's O.K. it's alright. I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere." She sank into my arms and I said "Mom I love you no matter what O.K.? I pulled her chin up and looked into her eyes and said "O.K.?" She said "O.K." and I squeezed her tighter.
We eventually fell asleep and I held her all night. I woke up with her in my arms and realized something had changed overnight. I realized that my love for my mother was now different somehow. She woke up as soon as I moved and looked into my eyes. She Asked "Is everything O.K.?" I said "No everything's better than O.K." She said "Nick, do you still love me?" I said "Yes, if I didn't love you I would have left last night. I also wanted to tell you again that I was sorry for what happened the other day." She chuckled and said " Yeah I'm sorry you saw my ugly body." I frowned at her and said "Quit saying that. Who put that bullshit notion in your head? Your the most beautiful woman I've ever seen and hearing you put yourself down like that pisses me off. Who told you that you have an ugly body."