Veil Watchers

"What did you think you were doing?" the hoarse whisper, androgenous and formless stirred the tiny hairs at the back of my neck. I shivered, unable to contain the fear that voice elicited.

"I do not know, sir," my own voice could barely maintain the cool civility that was required of all Veil Watchers.

"What you did was irresponsible, reprehensible and, worse for you, illegal,"

My hands clenched in my lap, white knuckling briefly. It took some effort to keep my features schooled of emotion. A Veil Watcher does not have emotion.

"I know, sir," I replied quietly.

"You know...you know..you know!" the voice grew instantly louder, causing my ears to ache. I longed to cover them. I tensed, waiting for the judgement, knowing it must come swiftly. But before me, a screen illuminated, the white panelling of the walls suddenly coming alive. And there she was. I could feel the muscles of my jaw tense as my teeth clenched, knowing what I was about to watch.

She slept, her alabaster form perfect beneath the white cotton of the sheets that she always made her bed with. I took a deep breath as though I would be able to inhale her jasmine scent and not the sterile, thrice cleaned air of the holding room. The Veil was still intact, just as it had been then, creating that haze that separated them from us. Protecting them, enfolding them, giving us purpose as we cared for them and watched.

I knew her form as well as my own; the clear pearl lustre of her skin, the singular curve of her breast, the violin arch of her back and hip. In her sleep, she moved, exposing one rose tipped breast. I could not stop from licking my lips. Seeing this was excruciating, the memory sharp still, but the awareness of what was to come pricking painfully. That pointed breast paused as it had not whilst the events had happened, the picture frozen.

"When did you start to desire her?" the question came almost idly, but rife with purpose.

"It took many months," I replied, knowing any dissemination would be discovered and swiftly punished, "I did my job." The latter was given added emphasis, but held little conviction.

"No, Watcher, you did not. If you had, we would not be here," the answer was soft, somehow more menacing than the earlier shout, "You lifted the Veil."

"She..." I paused, my eyes devouring her delicate features, "She was different."

There emptiness as my interrogator fell silent and the image on the wall began moving again. A hand came into view, mine own. I would recognise it even if I had not been aware of my actions.

My hand traversed barely an inch above the satin that was her flesh, circling the nipple without actually stimulating. Unbidden, it became erect and my hand clenched in my lap again, even as the virtual hand upon the screen jerked back in shock. I remember the surprise as it had coursed through my system. They were not meant to feel us, not sense us. But sometimes, only sometimes, there were a few who could sense there was something different, something odd if we were in a room.

Her back arched upon the bed, as though her breast sought my hand again. The sheet slipped further down that exquisite plane of flesh that was her torso. The image paused as both breasts, rounded and full, were revealed, the nipples hard; her pale pink cupid's bow mouth falling open in her sleep to take a breath. The slightest of blushes had begun to colour her chest, the beginning of arousal.

"Was this when you decided to drop the Veil?" came the question. "No, sir," I replied, faintly surprised that there was no awareness in the Order as to when it happened.

"What did you feel?" the question was unnecessary, but rich with curiosity.

"Feel, sir?"

"When you observed the human, what did you feel? What made you turn your back on everything you were taught?"

I looked back at the beautiful creature halted in repose upon the wall.

"Look at her, sir," I murmured, "I had never felt that before her. Never seen anyone else feel that. I have never been the cause of it. How could I not feel something as I bore witness?"

There was silence and after several breaths, many heartbeats, the movie of my downfall continued. She stopped arching her back and her brows drew together in a frown, as though disappointed she was denied contact with my fingertips. After a moment, the rest of my form came into view. I looked more corporeal than she, viewed from this side of the Veil.

My hands were placed on either side of her body, but she would feel no press of my weight upon the bed, nor the heat of my form so near her own, for the Veil was between us, an inexorable barrier that could not be denied. I witnessed my mouth draw near her own, as though I would kiss her, and in the here and now, I chewed on my lower lip, worrying it as I watched.

"You wanted to kiss her," it was a statement, not a question, and the scene was not paused this time.

"Yes, sir," I could not disagree.

My hands on screen ceased the appearance of supporting my weight. Her thighs fell apart and her arms shifted as though wishing to embrace something. But of course, to her, there was nothing there. My right hand slipped down her body, not touching, but my presence obviously felt as the ripple of tiny hairs upon her body went erect. There was the faintest of sounds as she took a gasping breath.

I remembered feeling then that I wanted to project this intense desire for her that I was feeling across the Veil. But it seemed inadequate. I wanted to touch her flesh, feel the silken folds of skin at her sex, her mound lightly dusted with light brown hairs that matched in shade the spiralling curls that cast about her shoulders, flowing in untidy waves about her oval face.

My touch must have stimulated her, for her hips ground against the opalescent sheen of the sheets, wrought by the moonlight streaming in from the open windows.

"Even before you lifted the Veil, you broke several laws," the disapproval was pervasive, "Even before the more serious charge, you would have had to answer to those."

"Yes, sir." What else was there to say? I could deny nothing, it was there in living colour before me. Had it not been, would I have wanted to?

"Your actions will have serious repercussions for us all," now there was sadness. Was it false?

"Because I dared do this?" I waved at the wall.

"Because you risked letting them know we exist! Once they know, it is over. All of this is over and they will have no protection! The Veil is gone, we are gone!" The desperation was palpable. I had not even considered that. My heart sank deeply. Had I truly...ended us? For the first time, my eyes dropped.

"Watch," the voice hissed, "Watch your selfishness so you are aware of what you have done. After this..." The voice trails off, and I am wise enough not to ask the ending of this sentence.

My eyes slide upwards to the screen, painfully aware now. My past self was lying alongside her, eyes locked upon the fascinating, finely crafted features that shifted and twitched in arousal as I stimulated her. Even now, I do not know how I did that, just that in her dream state, I was in that room with her, in her bed.

My fingers slid into the creamy folds of her sex. I could feel nothing of her through the Veil, none of the heat, none of the silken damp but somehow I just knew what she was like. I could taste it on my tongue.

Her hips ground against my hand, unable to feel anything at all beyond that which her dreams told her. Her hands slid across the bed, and in her sleep she clutched at the fabric, bunching and wrinkling it in her palms. She bit her lip and I remembered longing to kiss it. And through the Veil, I did. I filled in the sensations that were missing with my imagination. I could taste the honey of her mouth, the soft redness of her lips, the heat of her breath mingling with my own as she sighed.

The quietest of whimpers fell from her lips and she trembled beneath my touch, arching and writhing, but somehow not awakening, as though she was denying herself the displeasure that consciousness would bring. The flush travelled up to her cheeks, and I traced a kiss across the perfumed flesh. I slid a finger into her, testing her, marvelling at the way she reacted, gasping out soundlessly.

When she came, I had committed the worst crime of my kind. I lifted the Veil. It was no more than a heartbeat, but it allowed me to whisper the three words that condemned me.

"I love you."

Even as the Veil fell into place, her eyes snapped open. I do not know if she saw me. I do not know if she was aware of what happened, but upon wakening she lay upon the bed, staring sightlessly upward. If she had known I was mere inches from her face, memorising her features, she perhaps would not have laid there uncovered. But the damage was done. I had lifted the Veil without the proper authority.

And finally, the picture froze, forever etching that perfect form in my mind.

"Have you anything to say before we pass judgement?"

"There is nothing I can say, sir. I betrayed the trust placed in me."

"Then, I hope your actions were worth it, Watcher. Henceforth, you are banished. You will not be permitted to return."

I could feel the burning in my chest that meant the end of my time as a Veil Watcher, the end of my time here.

"We cannot afford the luxury of love," the voice continued, "We must protect them."

And as I faded into the black, I could not help but feel that uttering those three words, feeling her tighten around me, made it all worth it.