1
1630, England.
Faith sat beside her lord father as the priest spoke. The church pews were old, hewn from trees felled long before her time. The cathedral itself was older still, its stone walls rose high, reaching toward the heavens. Angels stood on plinths jutting out from the walls, looking serenely down upon the congregation.
The cathedral was full of stuffy parishioners sitting prim and proper in uniform rows. Each of them wore black, the women were dressed in floor length dresses which concealed their bodies from view. As she looked around, Faith's eyes locked with Lily's; their intense green bearing down into Faith's soul. A devilish grin crossed her lips and Faith averted her eyes.
Her heart pounded and she stared steadfastly at the large crucifix mounted on the wall behind the altar. After a moment she looked again and the older woman's gaze was fixed upon the priest; her expression serene and holy.
A glowing hot ember burnt inside Faith, settling deep in the base of her stomach. She pressed her legs together and straightened her posture. As the priest called for them to kneel, she obediently fell forward onto her knees, prostrating herself before the large crucifix, Christ's mournful eyes following her every movement.
"Let us pray," the priest's low voice echoed around the room. Faith closed her eyes and spoke to God. In these moments, she could feel him as though he were standing right in front of her. As she prayed for forgiveness for her sins, she felt the burning heat of his hand upon her breast and a striking pain sunk into place where the ember had burnt moments before. She gasped silently, clasping at her stomach and stifling the urge to cry out in pain.
This was a warning; one that she had felt before, one that she knew all too well. She had always tried to listen to God, to follow his path daily. She had committed herself to a life of sanctity and restraint, never to stray from his path. But Lily had waylaid her once again, with nothing but a look. Faith's brow creased, she pushed the woman from her mind and spoke again to God.
"Father, guide my heart that I might once again follow your path. Steer me from the wicked ways of the devil and the temptation of his sins." As she spoke, she felt his warmth again, settling into her heart. He was with her even when she felt the pull of Lily's wayward lust. He would guide her path always.
"My brothers and sisters," the priest said loudly, prompting the parishioners to move back into their seats. "It is oft said, that we must bring Christ into our lives, that we must open the doors of our hearts to him," the priest paused meaningfully, allowing the echo of his words to trail back through the church, "But, my brothers and sisters, Christ does not come into our lives, he is always there; he has always been there." With this, the priest extended his arms out and turn his palms upward, as though bathing in an unseen light.
To Faith, the priest always looked holy, pious; he was someone to be revered. She could listen to his sermons for hours on end and never grow weary. He breathed life into the words she had dutifully read in her bible, he breathed fire into the teachings of Christ. There was but one other time when she had felt so consumed by fire, touched by the hands of some deity.
She turned her eyes to Lily, whose own gaze was firmly fixed on the priest, her penitent demeanour betrayed nothing of the devil within. To those around her she was as devout and subservient to God as any member of the congregation. But Faith had seen another side of her two weeks prior, the woman had led her astray, down a path she longed to forget. She wouldn't let it happen again.
While around her, the parishioners faded their attentions back onto themselves, Faith sat upright, taking in every word. The priest, noticing, turned to her as he spoke, "Christ, is not some beggar to be ushered in front of a warm fireplace, he is the fire that warms the hearth." The ember in Faith's stomach ignited again, but this time it was not the shameful urgency she had felt before.
The spirit of God was moving within her. Her insides burned with his spirit, it flicked at her ribcage and at the bones of her hips, spreading a warmth that echoed, almost temptingly, to her thighs. This was the true feeling of God; this was piety made incarnate. She closed her eyes, and listened to the final moments of the sermon.
Her breath was deep and heavy, it filled her lungs with life and, as he finished the homily, she felt as though she were floating high above the pew. She sat in quiet reflection as the priest said his final words, prompting the parishioners to move toward the grand exit and out into the daylight.
Her parents left her, knowing as they did, that she liked to seek confession each week after the service. She waited until the pews sat empty, then stood and moved toward the confessional. The voice behind her was slick, as though coated with chrism oil. It made her freeze on the spot, an icy chill running down her spine.
"Confession, so soon?" came the voice of the devil herself. Faith turned to see Lily standing behind her, bemused. She looked upon Faith from her height, her long neck craning back as she peered down through heavy eyelids. The corners of her lips turned up into points and, between them, the sharp peaks of her teeth glistened. "Surely you can't have been that wicked," the temptress taunted.
"May God bless you," Faith said, trying to hold firm. Lily gave a cruel laugh and walked away, disappearing around the corner into a side chapel. Faith's resolve waivered momentarily and she shook her head clear. She parted the curtain of the confessional and sat down inside, her body still chilled from the encounter.
She spoke into the wooden grate that separated her from the silhouette of the priest. "Forgive me father for I have sinned, it has been seven days since my last confession." The priest did not answer and she continued. "I have been covetous, I have been lazy, and..." she paused, afraid to speak the words aloud.
"Tell me child, so that God may forgive," came the comforting voice of the priest in the chamber beside her. Her mind turned to Lily; the feeling of her lips pressed against her neck, how she had drawn such convulsions from Faith with nothing but a finger.
She calmed herself, taking a breath before speaking, "I have been lustful."
The priest considered a moment, his frail breathing passing through the grate. He was an aged man, of some 80 years. He spoke wisely, despite being so many years older than her. He was able to relate to all of his flock, and Faith was glad of it.
"My child, we are all guilty of desiring that which we know we must reject. So often we seek comfort in places that cannot provide it. Turn instead to God, where you will find not lust, but love. Consider this, and offer three Hail Mary's as penance for your sins."
"Thank you, Father," Faith whispered.
"God, the Father of mercies, through the death and the resurrection of His Son has reconciled the world to Himself and sent the Holy Spirit among us for the forgiveness of sins; through the ministry of the Church may God give you pardon and peace, and I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit."
As the priest finished his prayer, Faith made the sign of the cross and exited the confessional. Her mind was clear, her soul pure again. She knelt in a pew and said her penance. As she turned to leave, something moved behind her, she turned in time to see a trail of green fabric slither behind a pillar. She rushed for the exit and breathed a sigh of relief as the warmth of the sun fell upon her skin.
---
As Faith lay down to sleep, her mind was clouded once more. Phantoms roamed the edges of her room and visions of hellfire haunted her as she closed her eyes. She held her crucifix in her hands, she knew Lily could not reach her here- her chamber was in another wing of the castle- but somehow, she still felt her pull. Here, in the bareness of her bedchamber, the temptress's hands clawed at her urgency. She could feel Lily's fingers pawing at her thighs, beseeching her to follow her into the night.
A cool breeze blew through the open window and the thin cloth of her shift rippled over her body. The cool air chipped at her nipples, which rose with intensity as her breath deepened. Her hands fell from the crucifix, to her lap. The night around her swallowed her resolve and she delicately ran her fingers over the tender mound above her spot.
Nothing could compare to Lily's touch but, in these moments where she could close her eyes and imagine, she felt almost as good. She slid her fingers down to her spot, pressing the fabric of her shift between her folds. The fire ignited within her stomach and she gave herself over.
"L-lily," she moaned into the night.
---
When she awoke, it was dawn. The sins of the night were forgotten as she stared out through her window. The town was bustling already, farmhands bringing the days produce to the market. Below, in the courtyard, servants rushed to-and-fro. Faith pulled her undergarments up around her hips and stowed her night slip beneath her pillow.