Esther sat on the creaky wooden office chair next to the tiny desk in the cabin, feeling the ship rock all around her. Rough seas.
Her therapist, Dr. Sheenie Freundlich, sat on Esther's berth, her face urgent, her frizzy red hair reverse-haloed by the dark porthole behind her. So it's night? Esther thought. Maybe her cabin was far below the surface of the water. She didn't remember.
"What you're experiencing is called a dissociative fugue, Esther," Sheenie breathed in her nasal soprano squeak. Esther only looked at her, but did not respond. Since there was no way Esther's therapist was here on this cruise ship - she was probably drinking a glass of Pinot in her tasteful Santa Monica condo and browsing streaming movies on the Hallmark channel - obviously Sheenie was a hallucination produced by Esther's disordered mind. Given that simple fact, it probably wasn't necessary to speak to her own hallucination. Esther was unsure. "The gaps in your memory? Forgetting where you are? These elaborate hallucinations? It all fits the diagnosis."
Esther shrugged, lifting the jeweled straps of her elaborately decorated evening gown. She looked down at the glistening jewels on the gown. She couldn't remember having put it on. Great, a dissociative fugue, she thought.
"Don't be dismissive, Esther, this is important!" Sheenie squeaked. Esther attempted to focus on her face, which kept dissolving and reforming in her vision. Focusing was hard. "You're having some kind of psychotic break. The things you've been seeing on this ship - they're not possible. They defy the laws of physics and, frankly, the tenets of reality."
So I didn't have sex with three people at once on the banquet table at the Feast last night? Esther thought.
Sheenie sighed. "I think your own body will tell you that you did. But the things you saw around you while you were doing that? The crew growing goat legs and horns? Those people... dying? Those things can't have happened. Those things weren't real."
She had a hazy memory from the Feast, the previous night of being fucked by two men and a woman in masks on the banquet table, her naked ass squashed against a roasted turkey, of seeing the strangest things while she sucked one man's hard cock, the head of it fucking her throat, a second man's cock deep within her wet pussy, squatting on the woman's masked face as the woman licked her ass. She saw the banquet food coming to life and jumping into an obese man's mouth until he choked, a woman with a gas mask inhaling a cloudy substance until her head exploded, a man with a blood filled tube, connected to a slot machine that pulled his blood every time he pulled the lever, and he wouldn't stop pulling it. Why would I imagine such horrible things?
"Don't you see what they had in common? They're addictions, Esther. Food, drugs, gambling. You're projecting your own addiction to sex onto avatars that show you the deadly danger of giving in to your addiction. Your actions last night were, obviously... deeply concerning, but this is hopeful, not a thing to be frightened of - it shows you're beginning to realize that your addiction is causing you harm."
Am I even on a boat? Esther wondered.
"You are, but I'm sure it isn't this bizarre hellscape you've worked up in your head," Sheenie said. "It's probably just a normal cruise ship, and you're... embellishing it. But the thing is, Esther: you have to get off this ship. Find the doctor on board, and tell him you're having a psychotic break. You need to be brought back to the mainland and institutionalized, immediately. If this continues, I can't imagine what..."
Sheenie was gone. Esther's chauffeur with the sparkling blue eyes was standing in the cabin with her, just next to the desk, close enough for her to reach out and touch the shiny brass buttons on his double-breasted uniform jacket.
"Hello," Esther said, giggling. "Nice jodhpurs."
Her chauffeur grinned at her warmly. What was his name again? Something with an R. Why did she have a chauffeur and a jewel-encrusted gown? She was a production assistant for a struggling production company. She mostly ate rice and beans that she made herself at home in her tiny Echo Park apartment. Rice and beans were cheap.
"Ma'am. That joke is funnier every time you tell it. Delivery for you, ma'am." He held out a creamy thick envelope to her. The outside said, "Miss Esther Saxl" in black cursive letters.
She opened it carefully, her fingers were a little shaky. Inside was a thick yellow card, the cursive letters embossed on its surface. It read:
Mr. Lefteris is delighted to invite you to
A POOL PARTY
Esther, you shall be the main attraction!
Pavilion Pool, Deck 12
9pm
Come as you are!
Esther looked up at the chauffeur. "What time is it now?"
"It's 8:45, ma'am. I do wish I could've given you more notice, ma'am, more time to prepare, but we really must leave now. I have just received the invitation and I came straight here. As my employer planned, Mr. Lefteris did find you very... appealing. Last night. Everything is falling into place. If you're ready, we may go."
She stood up, swaying with the motion of the ship. "Do I need a bathing suit?"
"Ah. It's not exactly that kind of pool party. Come as you are, it says." He opened the door to the corridor and stood at attention. "After you, ma'am."
She stood, and walked out before him into the corridor. She stopped and looked back at him, pointing her fingers in opposite directions, the question on her face. "This way, ma'am. Please follow me." It was difficult to walk in shoes with spikes taller than the Converses she usually wore, especially with the entire ship rolling from side to side. Esther held the railing and walked slowly.
"What kind of a pool party is it, exactly?"