The Reality Blur

Note to the Webmaster: There are portions of italics throughout the story. These are necessary throughout as the intention is for the reader to understand a sort of 'backstory' or a story within a story. So please, if possible, keep the italicized portions as they are. Further, there are portions with "------------------------------", this is used to separate different scenes from another. Specifically, in the beginning my story jumps around a lot and this provides a method to alleviate any confusions that may arise from the reader. Finally, the statement of "HHHRRRRRNNNNHHHHHHHH" is intended to be an onomatopoeia for a siren that is long and drawn out. In my head it sounds exactly like the tsunami warning siren or military siren, I have no problems if you feel that it is necessary to shorten it. Thank you!

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Hi everyone! I have been an active reader on this website for a long time now. However, it was only recently that I finally decided to put this amazing experience that I went through down on paper. The experience that I am referring to is different from the conventional idea of an 'experience'; mine was lived through a lucid dream. Essentially, what I have written down and published onto this website is my story of a ridiculously crazy adventure, discovery, sex, and romance; unfortunately, as is obvious, a lucid dream cannot last forever. Here's the story of how I lived through the most exciting experiences of my life and had some immensely passionate encounters; only to have my heart and soul crushed eight short hours later.

Warning: The beginning is quite boring. However, I feel like it's necessary to keep these parts of the story in so that it is better understood who the character is before he discovers his adventurous gift.

Disclaimer: All people in this story are over the age of 18. Many of the characters in this are in fact real people. However, names and descriptions have been changed to ensure that none of these people could ever be associated with those in the story.

Introduction - A Flash Forward

"I can't believe this... I really love you. It all feels so surreal. I hate saying it, I hate it so much. But with you, it just seems to come naturally. Please tell me, where can I find you? Where? Its a big world. You're a tiny woman. It will be impossible." I said, as tears began to form in my eyes.

Through the watery film on my eyes I noticed the environment around me changing; mountains were growing out of dust, the colours of the sky were shifting, and great rolling purple clouds were forming. I won't have much time left now, I thought to myself. The level of control I was exerting wouldn't last much longer, but I held as tightly as I possibly could nonetheless. Just another minute, it's all I ask for.

"Don't cry Joseph." Olivia said. She moved closer to me, shrinking the gap between our two bodies. "Everything is going to be okay. You just need to be patient." She intensely watched the tears fill my eyes, all the while managing to remain smiling.

She traced her index finger up and down my forearm. I twisted my head to the side and observed what seemed like a 10000 foot tall mountain crumble into tiny bits of sand; my face was scrunched up. "I doubt it. I'm busy, very busy. I... just don't have time for patience!" Her head flinched at my sudden aggression. "Tell me, please tell me, is..is there anyone out there, like you?"

I continued exerting as much control on the situation as possible but I could feel a massive atmospheric change occurring. The humidity around me was rising quickly, it's going to rain. The ground beneath my feet was shifting, purple thorned plants began to rise through the cracks of the freshly split cement. I have seconds left.

Olivia's piercing bright green eyes were searing their image into my brain; I would never forget her beauty, never. She stared deeply, penetrating my skin and reaching through my soul. "Joseph." She paused on my name, a hint of sadness resting on her tongue. "Today was perfect, it was amazing. It was more than I could have ever asked for. We conquered the world together." She reached out and grabbed my hands. The touch of her soft-skinned delicate fingers sent electric currents through me. She leaned in and pushed her soft lips against mine, her scent was intoxicating, she rested there for a few seconds. I kept my eyes open and stared at her face; she had imperfections, blemishes, like any other... but in my eyes, she was astonishing. My heart was fluttering.

She pulled back and smiled at me.

The truest and most sincere form of an emotional connection had enveloped me. "I hope you know that I'm never going to forget you. Every chance that I get I will come looking for you."

She looked at me with discontent. "Joseph, before I go, there's something you need to know." Her face became serious.

"What- what is it?" Olivia's demand for attention was frightening.

"Do not make the same-".

Chapter 1 - Reality (Present Day)

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

I yanked the puffy pillow up over my face and wrapped it around my ears. "David shut that off!"

"Buddy, RELAX. It's almost noon." He sat up, slapped his hand down on the alarm clock, shot out of bed, and seemed to be ready to head out the door in a few seconds flat.

He was impressively quick to get ready in the mornings. But he was also oblivious to the amount of noise he was making. I pleaded. "Come on man, can you at least make a little less noise?"

David shook his head and exhaled deeply. "Don't you have something to do today?" He asked.

My grandfathers christmas dinner! And just as quickly as I complained about his obnoxious behaviour, I myself was bouncing around the room preparing for my shower. I jogged down the hall; shower caddy, two towels, and my phone in hand. I enjoyed listening to music while in the shower, it ironed my stressors out and prepared me for the day.

I stepped inside the largest of the three showers, I gave the girl who just walked in behind me a devious smirk. On my floor this was a coveted shower stall, today it would be mine.

I set my phone upright against one of the walls on the bench, hung my towels on the door, and turned the heat on full blast. After a few seconds of my skin adapting to the seemingly-boiling water, I reached for my phone and searched for some music. Quickly, I stumbled upon one my favourite piano pieces- Nocturne op.9 No.2 by Chopin.

I stood still as the water washed itself through my hair. I stared down at my chest and arms, a smile pulling itself across my face. I had done a lot of work for myself these past four months. This was my first semester in university, my first time living away from home, my first time managing every aspect and corner of my life; food, finances, health, happiness. It was all mine to handle, all mine for the taking. I began to reminisce about all the wonderful memories I had made in my time here so far. I had met some amazing people, all from different corners of the world; they each had different dreams, passions, ambitions, and each and every one of them left a lasting impression on me. I very quickly realized that there is a lesson to be learned from everyone; and the day you begin to believe otherwise, is the day you have failed yourself.

The song on my phone switched to the Spring Waltz, also by Chopin. I welcomed the change in tune. This piece was enchanting, it never failed to spark a sense of creation and imagination in me.

I grabbed the dripping-wet shampoo bottle and finished off my shower with a thorough cleansing.

As the music came to an end, my time in the shower would also end. I quickly dried my hair, threw on a towel, and then left the bathroom.

During my awkward shuffle back to the room, barely managing to hold my towel around my waist, I was halted in my tracks. Jessica stood by the elevator. Damnit! I thought to myself. Why does the god damn elevator have to be ten feet from my door?

She immediately made eye contact with me. "How'd your exams go?" She asked with disinterest.

"They went alright. Uh, how about you? I haven't- uh- seen you in a while?" I cleared my throat.

Jessica and I met each other during our first few days here. People on the floor could hear me training my Muay Thai switch kick against my freestanding bag. The switch kick was powerful, it was a relentless and rapid weapon that resembled the force of a bat. With all of the noise being generated, Jessica was the one who voted to come knock on my door and see what was happening. When I opened the door and saw her flawless face, my jaw nearly hit the floor. Her long dark-brown hair was curled in the most perfect spots and her eyes were sharp and seemed to glisten under the bright light shining above her head. The mixture of her Ukrainian and Japanese parents seemed to etch out the model of a spokesperson for intercultural conception. She had the sex appeal of a world-class supermodel. We both stared into each others eyes for a few moments and then she asked me in the most provocative voice I would ever hear, "So? You're a fighter?". What happened afterwards was an embarrassing attempt at enticing her.

The encounter ended as quickly as it began and I had forever destroyed my chance of getting to know her. How could I be so stupid? I constantly thought to myself.

The bell on the elevator sounded. "Busy." She responded, and in a flash disappeared behind the closing doors.

I stared down at the ragged carpet floor and scratched the top of my head.

I guess I should be used to this sort of thing by now. My inability to talk to any girl that I was attracted to had reared its ugly head time and time again. How could I ever meet a girl? Let alone date a girl when I couldn't even get past the first few sentences of conversation.

It wasn't always like this for me, though. In high school, I had the gift of gab. I could weave my words into charming statements of intent and allure. I was a social butterfly, and there wasn't a nerve that could be struck in any social situation, under any circumstances. However, ever since I rediscovered my passion for the field of medicine early in the semester, my entire focus has been on studying and volunteering. I was maintaining a perfect 4.0 gpa. But this came at a cost. My social life was taking a big hit, my only friend was my roommate; and that came with its own problems.

I need to stop loafing around about this stuff. Besides, now isn't the time to worry about my social life, it's the time to assign full focus into my academics.

I unlocked and opened the heavy set dead bolted door to my room and stepped inside.

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12:47 - Absent-mindedly, I take the wrong bus out of the university and head in the entirely opposite direction of where I was supposed to be. After riding a few stops towards the west end of the city I finally realized, I was lost. Slowly, I've come to understand some of the less enjoyable aspects of living in a huge metropolis; sometimes, an equally large amount of confusion can be whirled up. As a result, I end up spending two extra hours standing around in the freezing cold weather waiting for a set of busses, which may or may not come, to take me to some easterly, far-out, sprawling suburb.

15:49 - After a half-hour of walking from my bus stop, I finally arrive at my grandfathers house. As soon as I step foot through the threshold of the entrance my younger cousins come sprinting down the hall, their arms and legs flailing and whaling in unstructured form. They're overwhelmingly ecstatic to see me. Of course, I'm flattered and spend some time running around the house with Gerald, he's three years old and seems to have the energy of an antelope. His joy and excitement immediately molds my tired and moppy mood into a state of fun and play. We run around for what seemed like hours on end, occasionally hearing "Be careful! He could trip and fall!" yelled in my direction. Thankfully, dinner would be on the table soon enough and I could allocate the entirety of my energy left to engorging on a buffet of holiday cuisine.

19:34 - After an overly stuffed turkey, garlic mashed potatoes, pasta salad, tomato laiden whole-wheat bruschetta, and a load of apple pie, my stomach had reached its absolute maximum capacity. All in all, the food was amazing. It filled me to the brink of extinction, rumbling and grumbling sounds contributing to my oncoming lethargy. I stood up from the table, still occupied by all fifteen something guests, and made my final proclamation of the night. "Well. That's it for me guys. Thank you so much for the food! But, I'm exhausted, so goodnight!"

I began carrying my lethargic ridden body up a short flight of stairs. I opened the spare bedroom door and exhaled deeply. A feeling of euphoria pulsed through my veins. Finally. I thought to myself. A chance to sleep by myself. I pulled my socks off, threw my jeans and shirt to the ground, and dove underneath the triple layered comforter spread. Sleep's exhaustive and overdrawn grasps entangled itself around my psyche. Within moments I had fallen prey to its power.

Chapter 2 - The Dream World

"Could we get all volunteers in the neurology unit to the central kitchen immediately, please." A voice on the p.a. system announced.

I finished up my bagel and tossed my empty water bottle into the recycling bin. I tightly constricted my esophagus and forced the enormous portion of food through my throat. I rubbed the last bits and crumbs off my hands and headed out the door towards the elevator, rising to the seventh floor. As the doors opened up, the profuse smell of chemically enhanced floor cleaner stung my nostrils. Walking down the hallway towards the main kitchen I had to hold my right hand above my eyes, a shield from the ridiculously bright ceiling lights. With each step I took my shoes created a slight squeaking noise.

"Oh good you're here!" The nurse clapped her hands together. "You seem to be the only volunteer left. We're going to need you to feed the patients in room 741, 743, and 745." The nurse pushed the food cart towards me.

Why was I all alone? I thought. "Okay, no worries." I smiled back at the nurse and pulled the food cart out of the kitchen. I quickly started pushing the cart down the hall towards the first room.

"Good evening." I gave a warm-hearted smile to the elderly man in the bed. "Are you hungry? There's lots of food for you here, sir! It looks really, really good!" I tried to make the food sound as appealing as possible. It was often very difficult to get the patients in the neurology unit to eat their dinner. Falling to horribly unfortunate circumstances, most of the patients were paralyzed and suffering in the post-stroke recovery period. As a result, their interest in eating meals was often negligible. It also didn't help that their beds were in awfully aesthetically unpleasant settings. The walls were painted a dirty whitish colour and the only source of entertainment in the room was a TV, which appeared to be at least twenty-years-old. The bedside table was metallic, and the bulking medically related machines filled the room with an ominous shade of fear.

"Mhm." The elderly man responded. He lifted his right hand ever so slightly off the bed, just enough to point towards me, the food, and then towards his mouth.

"Okay perfect." I pushed the cart to the side of the man's bed. "I think you're really going to like this, it smells amazing." I insisted, while pushing the fork through its plastic packaging.

The elderly man forced out an agitated response. "Mmmmuuhh". He shakingly pointed his nimble index finger towards the mashed potatoes. His eyes flashed images of hunger-induced pugnacity.

I smiled at the man. "Okay sir, no worries! We'll start with the mashed potatoes." I cheerfully said. This poor man has suffered one of the most debilitating of diseases, I definitely could not hold his agitation against him. I silently thought to myself, while dipping the fork into the first mouthful of potato. "Alright, here we go sir." I lightly pressed the forkful of potato against his lips, and after a few seconds he opened up. "Just a bit wider for me. Thank you!" He opened his mouth as I had asked and was immediately gratified by the taste of fresh food in his mouth.

He nodded his head in approval. Sighs of relief escaped his mouth in between his chewing.

HHHHRRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!

The heart-stopping sound of a military warning siren roared through the hospital. I looked down, wide-eyed, at the patient in the bed. His body, suddenly, was completely limp, his lifeless eyes stared right through me. What the hell just happened? My heart rate accelerated to impossible speeds faster than the Bugatti Veyron. I was frozen in place for what seemed like an eternity.

HHHHRRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!

"Jesus christ. Shit!" I tried to wrestle with the onslaught of panic. "DOCTOR! I need a doctor in here!" I dropped the fork down on the table and ran to the door, my head darting from side to side; nothing, the halls were empty and filled with darkness. Not a single person was in sight.

HHHHRRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!

Once again the unimaginably loud siren sent waves of shock through me. I looked back at the lifeless man in the bed, "I'm so sorry". Suddenly the whole room began to shake. The windowpanes fluid motions instantly drew my attention. I ran to the window, hoping to see what was going on outside. "My god." I stood, petrified, staring at the wall of water raging towards me. Nothing could prepare me for what was about to come; in less than ten seconds it would be here.

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My eyes burst open and I was suddenly awake. The room was pitch black and quieter than the deepest depths of the Mariana Trench. I pulled myself up and walked to the bathroom. Dragging my lazy, sleep-ridden, feet across the carpet was a mission and a half. Slowly, my dream was coming back to me. In fact, it was quite odd. I thought to myself. It completely brought me back to my volunteering-at-the-hospital days, minus the wall of water of course.

I finished my midnight bathroom break and walked back to the bedroom.

I tucked myself back under the sheets and slowly began drifting off to sleep.

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I sat up in the drowned-out grass. The sun was shining brightly and the birds chirped the songs of spring. But the smell of muddy water revealed the true character of the environment. That of death and destruction. I intensely rubbed my eyes and tried to see what was around me. I was in, essentially, a decimated village; by some sort of flood it seemed. I cracked my back and pulled myself into a standing position. All I could see, far and wide, was the crushed remains of flimsy housing. All of the trees were bent out of shape and there was debris sprawled out across the fields of dead grass; some sort of flooding definitely had occurred here.

Suddenly, a horrific shrieking sound pounded through my ears. It was coming from a severely damaged hut, I ran towards it.

"Joseph!" The voice of a little girl stopped me dead in my tracks.

I spun around, looking for the source of the voice. Nobody was around. "Hello? Who was that?" I asked.

A little girl slammed into my back leg, hugging tightly. "I just wanted to say thank you." She said.

I couldn't see her face yet. "Umm.." I responded. I tapped her back shoulder, to sort of usher her, so that she was in front of me. She unhooked her grasp and walked around. "Oh..my...god.." I stammered. It was Rita, the little girl from the Philippines that I was sponsoring.

"I just wanted to say thank you. For all the letters, and the gifts, and the emergency support." She was only eleven years old, but her words displayed sophistication and intellect.