Cody! Where are you?!?" Lucille called out, slicing another pizza and sliding it into its cardboard box. "You're needed!"
Behind her the door to the employee bathroom loudly swung open as a young man emerged, a 19-year old blonde college dropout and minimum-wage pizza delivery boy Cody who was still struggling with zipping up his fly. Having been one of the store's only late-night delivery drivers for the last few months had left him tired, and the nocturnal schedule he had been operating on had left him looking for something to shake things up for once. "
Yeah, yeah
, I heard you the first time." He muttered, rinsing his hands in a nearby sink. "It's nearly eleven. Who needs this much pizza on a Tuesday night?"
Sliding a half-dozen pizza boxes into a warmer, she handed the stack to Cody's outstretched hands. "Max went out for a smoke break right before we had this big order come in, so we're already behind. I need you to drop these off ASAP."
"No worries, boss." Cody replied nonchalantly, digging into his pocket for his keys and exiting through the back of the store. Wrestling with the locks on his beaten-up secondhand Ford for a brief moment in the parking lot, he threw the pizzas into the passenger seat and revved the engine. Almost immediately, the dusty old cooler blasted cold air into his face before he had a chance to turn it down.
"Lemme see here..." he said, adjusting the dials on his radio before picking up a signal for a local radio station blasting old school rock tunes. "It'll have to do..." Shifting the vehicle into reverse and backing out of the lot, he began his regular journey. Pulling up the first location on his phone, he recognized it as one of the dorms from the local college. Some sort of frat party or something, he assumed, considering the order was for six pizzas to one location.
Turning out onto the highway, mostly empty with the bulk of the city's usual traffic already at home at this late hour, he hit the throttle and went speeding down the road. Looking at his own reflection in the windshield, visible as he passed under the dirty yellow streetlights, he absentmindedly began brushing his hair, trying to make it settle properly on his head. There was no harm in going a little over the limit if
nobody was around
, was there?
Cody was making good time when the telltale sound of sirens began blaring behind him. Checking his rear-view mirror, he could see the flash of red-and-blue lights from an undercover cop car. "
Shit!
" he exclaimed to nobody in particular, nervously pulling over to the side of the road. Waiting anxiously in his seat, he waited as an officer walked up to his window.
"Do you know how fast you were going there?" the middle-aged cop asked, pulling a pen and paper from a pocket in his jacket.
Cody didn't have a good answer, only able to watch in horror as he saw the policeman's pen trace the letters of what would easily be another expensive road violation.
And just when I finished saving up
, he thought dejectedly, his shoulders limp. A few minutes later he was behind schedule once again, with a three-figure speeding ticket to be paid and a stack of quickly-cooling pizzas. "Fuck me..." he said, driving the limit this time. "I really need to
change my life up
. Or at least let something happen that gets me out of this shitty job."
Finally pulling into the front of the small house marked for the delivery a few minutes later, he jumped out of the car and grabbed the tower of pizza boxes. Much to his surprise, the place appeared to be mostly silent. He expected some sort of big party, like these big orders were usually for. That was at least until he approached the door, where he could hear the unmistakable muffled sounds of a woman moaning. Trying his best to avoid the awkwardness and remain professional - after all, this wasn't the first time he'd interrupted somebody's '
personal time
' - he gingerly knocked on the door. "Hello?" he called out, checking the ticket stub. "Delivery for...
Alexis
? 6 pepperoni and cheese pizzas?"
The voice suddenly went quiet, and he heard the sound of two pairs of footsteps walking up to the door.
I guess there must be a few people here after all
, he thought, as the door cracked open slightly and a slender hand poked out, holding a handful of crumpled notes. "Yes, that's me. How much is it? I think this is enough..." a woman's voice said, an eyeball peeking through the small chink in the door.
"I'll just leave these here then?" Cody said, less asking than announcing, and grabbed the change out of her hand. Quickly counting it, he saw that it was exactly how much the order was worth just as the door slammed shut. Annoyed, he almost considered handing it back to her. Any other day, he probably would have just put up with it; he was used to college kids being stingy, but today the ticket had put him in a bad mood. He knocked on the door again. "
Really?
No tip? You really ordered six pizzas for yourself?"
Much to his surprise, the voice on the other side responded. "Alright, alright, that was kind of a dick move. Okay, give me a second, I think I have something here..." the door swung open suddenly and Cody was finally able to get a better look at the strange woman.
"
What the fuck?
" Cody almost screamed, stepping backwards in surprise as he marveled at the figure stood in front of him. Instead of a normal human lady, the thing stood before him was barely a person at all - instead there was the pale, thin figure of a mutant woman, six naked breasts in three pairs down the front of her chest and her long brunette tied up behind her in a ponytail. With piercing, soft blue eyes and flawless skin, Cody might even have considered her attractive were she not so strange. Though what really shocked him was the back of her body. Where a human's ass would be was another body like the black of a horse, still hairless like the rest of her form, four long legs and soft feet holding her up. Scanning up and down, he could see another four bloated, heavy breasts swinging underneath her, knocking against both pairs of thighs as she rifled through a leather handbag, the only thing covering any of her body.
Pulling out a small strange furry key-chain, she reached out to pass it to him. "This might not seem like much, but this was extremely valuable. We tried everything we could to reverse the transformation but it was impossible. You can have it now. And for the record, I've got a big body to support, and I still love pizza."
"
Is this some kind of joke?
