A strange little box arrived in the mail today. Keri looked for the return address, but what there was of it was not anyone or any company she recognized. The real problem with the return address was that it apparently was not printed with waterproof ink and was badly smeared. None the less, it was addressed to her and that part was perfectly legible. An innocuous little box, about six inches square, all brown cardboard with brown paper sealing tape holding it shut. Keri set the little box on the kitchen table and sorted through the rest of her mail, with most of it being junk mail and going straight into the trash unopened.
Finally, she turned her attention to the little mystery box. She got a small knife out of the kitchen drawer and cut the tape. Inside was a mass of bubble wrap. She pulled the mass of bubble wrap out and opened it. There, finally, was a bright fuzzy yellow ball that almost looked like a tennis ball, except that the lines of a tennis ball weren’t on this one. A set of plastic lips appeared to be stuck to this odd little ball. Red lips, not unlike the wax ones sold in novelty stores. Under the ball was a folded up piece of paper. Keri set the odd little ball down and unfolded the piece of paper. Maybe this would give her a clue about what it was and who sent it. There were just four printed lines in the middle of the page. They read:
You must be completely naked and sitting down to use this Kissing Ball.
To turn it on, say “Kiss me, kiss me, do.”
To turn it off, say “Kiss me, kiss me, not.”
This Kissing Ball only works three times.
Ha! Yea, right, she thought. Like this thing is actually going to do something? What was it supposed to do anyway, jump up in the air and plant one on her lips? She wondered who sent this and if it was some sort of practical joke. One thing was sure, she wasn’t going to get naked right here in the kitchen and try it. She glanced at the windows. Nope, not open. She had the blinds down as it was a hot day and she had been trying to keep the sun out while she was at work. No, no one could know her habits and think they could send her this little thing and get her to strip in her kitchen so they could see her naked. None the less, she wasn’t about to get undressed and try it.
She left the Kissing Ball and it’s directions on the table and went off to her bedroom to get out of her work clothes and into something more comfortable. Having never gotten completely nude, she never thought to try the Kissing Ball. Keri paid scant attention to the Kissing Ball the rest of that evening, making a quick dinner for herself and watching some television.
Finally, much later that evening, Keri took a shower before otherwise getting ready for bed. After the shower, now clad only in a terry robe, she went back to the kitchen for some ice water. She noticed the Kissing Ball on the table. She smiled, and finally said, kiss me, kiss me, do. Nothing happened. She read the instructions one more time to see if she had it right. She did. Then she read the first line again. Oh, she had to be nude and sitting down. She carried the little Kissing Ball into her living room and over to the couch. Keri noticed that the clock now read eleven o’clock. She set the ball and page of directions on the couch, dropped her robe to the floor, and sat on the edge of the couch nude. This is silly, she thought. I’m an idiot for even trying this. She rolled her eyes and slumped back against the back of the couch. “I’m really way too tired for this nonsense, she muttered.” But, now that she was following the instructions to the letter, she said the turn-on phrase one more time: “Kiss me, kiss me, do.”
The little ball slowly arose in the air about a foot, the lips now looking very real, and it quickly moved around in front over her above her crotch and slowly lowered itself between her slightly parted legs. In wide-eyed complete disbelief, Keri moved her legs apart as the Kissing Ball descended to crotch level with the lips aimed directly at her pussy. She stared at it in complete disbelief. There was no noise and it was floating in mid air! It paused there for a few seconds without doing anything. Then the lips parted and a very real looking and very long tongue came out and licked over the lips. It appeared to be waiting.
While Keri thought this was all very strange, there was nothing threatening about the little fuzzy yellow ball with lips, and the way that tongue had licked the lips, it even looked erotic. Okay, it looked very erotic. There was nothing about sex she liked better than being eaten by a guy with a talented tongue. She moved her legs a little further apart.
