(This story contains graphic sexual depictions, including m/f mutual masturbation with gentle femdom overtones. It also contains an abstract sci-fi dilemma surrounding valid consent, but all participants in the acts depicted are enthusiastic and over the age of 18. For the reading pleasure of interested adults only.)
***
"You're sure he's ready?" Delia asked when Captain Philips gave her the assignment.
Her question was less a question than a stalling tactic. She knew perfectly well that the captain of the Prospector wouldn't have begun this briefing without careful consideration.
"It's been seven months," said Philips. "Cog453 has made impressive strides adjusting to life on... a different sort of team."
"A third of his brain is still made of Crupp tech," said Delia.
"Which is disturbing," Philips acknowledged, "and unfortunate. For him. But it poses no threat to you. In fact, if you're concerned about his loyalty, or his stability, think of it as insurance. You'll be the one holding the controls."
"Me?" Delia put a hand to her chest, first to emphasize the word, then to pound her airway clear when she choked on it.
"Of course," said Philips. "No one else will be within range to use them during the mission."
"You want me to
use
Crupp tech?"
"I trust you to treat the task with sensitivity and respect," Philips told her seriously. "You'll have complete control over Cog453's actions. He'll follow your commands, and if you deem it necessary, you can use the full override mode and pilot him like a shuttle, but I really don't believe you'll need to for security purposes."
"I'd prefer not to have that option at all, sir," said Delia.
"It's not for you," said Philips. "So far, Doctor Kellan hasn't been able to fully deactivate Cog453's initiative inhibitor. The poor guy still needs to be
ordered
to eat. That's why, at least for now, someone has to be responsible for the controls at all times. If carrying them has the side effect of making you feel safer around him, fine. If not, find another way to deal."
"Do you think this is fair to him?" Delia reached for her last objection.
"Nothing about the last twenty years has been fair to Cog453," noted Philips.
"I know," said Delia, "But I mean, sending him back out into the same asteroid field where the Crupp kept him for all those years...?"
"He insists that he wants to help, and that it doesn't bother him," said Phillips. "If we really want him to live as one of us, we're going to have to start honoring his choices sooner or later, even if they don't make sense to us."
Delia nodded, accepting the truth of this, preparing herself. "Yes, sir."
#
Cog453 arrived in the docking bay of the Prospector at the appointed time, climbed into the starboard pilot's seat of the scanner ship, and looked to Delia, already waiting in the matching port seat.
His awareness of her encompassed three main points:
Firstly, she was to be his only source of new orders for the duration of the mission, and she suddenly looked terribly small to rely upon for that purpose. Yes, she was wearing the wristband with the controls for his implants. But she was just one person with one body, even shorter, narrower, and softer than his own, with all the usual organic vulnerabilities. If anything happened to that body while they were out in the field alone, she would be gone, and he would be completely alone. Lost.
Secondly, her face and posture were fixed in an expression Cog 453 had recently learned to recognize as discomfort. There were many reasons, Doctor Kellan had told him, why his new colleagues might experience discomfort around him — his inexperience with social interaction, his association with the Crupp, even the very nature of his existence. Most Humans didn't like being reminded how much of their identities could be boiled down to the physical workings of their brains, and how fragile they could therefore be.
Thirdly, Cog453 found himself observing that Delia was very pretty, with strong cheeks, dark hair that looked silky to the touch, and an intricate eyeliner design that must have required significant patience to master. He had been taught better than to mention this sort of observation at work, especially to a woman who was already showing discomfort, but he made a mental note to report it to Doctor Kellan in his next progress assessment. Just last week, he had not been able to distinguish the quality of "prettiness" in anyone or anything.
Delia entered the takeoff sequence, set the course, and then drummed her fingers on her side of the control console, as the scanner ship left the Prospector behind and headed for open space.
"So... how are you settling in?" She winced as if her own question had increased her discomfort.
"I have no frame of reference to judge the experience by," Cog453 answered. "It has been difficult, learning to tolerate unpredictability, but the difficulty decreases daily. I've found I enjoy interacting with other feeling minds. I hope to improve my skills in that area."
"Other feeling minds?" Delia isolated his wording. "So, your feelings are coming back?"
"Some," answered Cog453.
Delia's chewed on her lower lip.
Cog453 decided to ask. "Is there anything I can do to make this experience easier for you?"
Delia made a sound that would have to be categorized as a laugh, but was not consistent with humor. "Easier for
me?
I should be asking
you
... I just, I don't know how you can be feeling anything right now and not want to burn the universe down with everyone inside it."
"I don't know why anyone would want that," Cog453 told her in as comforting a tone as he could generate.
"This," Delia said, gripping her wristband. "This is why. I'm so sorry about this."
"Why are you sorry?" Cog453 asked. "You're preserving my life with that device."
"You shouldn't need me to," insisted Delia. "We should have done something to stop this from happening to you, before it happened."
Cog453 thought this over carefully. With so little experience, he was probably wrong, but it certainly
sounded
like something he had already been taught.
"Doctor Kellan says I had no control over what the Crupp did while I was under their rule," he said. "Or over what they did to the rest of my colony when I was a very small Human."
"Of course you didn't," Delia agreed immediately.
"But you did?" he asked. "When you were, I estimate, a comparably small Human?"
"...No," Delia sighed, with heavy resistance. "I guess not."
"So, there was nothing you could have done?" Cog453 confirmed. "And therefore nothing you should have done?"
"I get it," said Delia.
"Perhaps Doctor Kellan could help you as well," Cog453 suggested. "To better internalize the concept."
Delia's next vocalization sounded more like humor.
"Maybe," she agreed.
As they approached the Glittering Claim asteroid field, strewn with abandoned Crupp equipment, Cog453 became aware of Delia looking at him more frequently, with concern.
For most of Cog453's life, this field had belonged to the Crupp, and functioned like a massive machine, built from abducted and modified living cogs like himself, with a single Crupp administrator assigned to maintain the system and handle any rare glitches.
Now that the field was officially in Human territory again, all the mining equipment lay silent. Most of the cogs had been killed in the retreat, and others were being rehabilitated on Earth.
Only Cog453 was here now, out of tens of thousands, to help prepare the mines for very different management.
"Do you feel anything?" Delia asked eventually. "Being back out here, I mean?"
Cog453 hadn't expected to. He had been unable to feel anything during his captivity here, not even boredom or despair, so he had thought there would be nothing to reexperience when he saw it again.
"I feel... relief," said Cog453. "I think it's relief."
"To see that they're really gone?" Delia guessed.
"No," Cog453 said, then added, "Maybe, partly. I believe I'm most relieved that the work I spent my life on is
not
gone. It's all still here, ready to be put to a different use."
"Not a bad way to look at it," said Delia. "Once we get some solid readings on what's left in these rocks, we can start prioritizing which machinery to salvage. We're going to start with the largest one along the near edge of the stabilization array."
She looked to him, and Cog453 recognized that she was expecting him to do something.
"I need you to order me," he reminded her.
"Right, sorry, the initiative inhibiter," she said, and pressed the activation button on her wristband gently, as if she thought it might break. "Is this okay?"
"I am receiving your commands," Cog453 confirmed.
"Okay, then. Initiate the separation sequence and land on the outward turned side of the target asteroid. Once you're in position, activate your sensor node and watch to make sure it connects with mine. If it doesn't, or if anything else goes wrong, establish radio contact."
She touched one of the two-way radios mounted on either side of the split control console.
Cog453 nodded, entered his half of the separation command, and stifled a sigh as one of his implants released its reward chemical into his brain.
A partition closed between Cog453 and Delia, there was a shift of air pressure, and the ship split itself in two down the middle, allowing them to diverge and land on opposite sides of the asteroid.
The chemical kept flowing at a steady drip with his continuing obedience.
#
Delia anchored her half of the scanner ship to the asteroid and ran a check on its sensor node, confirming a complete circuit with the one on Cog453's side. She set the scan to run, reclined her seat, and took a moment to breathe.
In a way, Cog453's apparent indifference to his own ordeal was comforting. Blankness and a clean slate to build a life on was far preferable to the suffering she had imagined for victims of the Crupp. And it spared her having to figure out how to respond to the sort of feelings she would have expected to come up.
At the same time, his composure made her feel all the more inadequate. The Crupp had taken him, not her, and he wasn't letting it slow him down. What business did she have getting lumps in her throat at the mere thought of them?
It was bad enough having to imagine Crupp machines out there full of strangers. The longer she spent around Cog453, the more times she had to look at that cute smile he got whenever he discovered something new, or the wrinkle in the middle of his forehead when he was trying to understand other people, the harder it was to accept a universe where anyone would ever want to hurt him.
Her radio crackled.
"Delia?"
She pushed the button to answer. "Yeah, all good on this end, how's it looking for you?"
"Delia, I believe I am experiencing a medical event."
