The sunset was just beginning to fade out of the sky, and as the shadows crept around me I felt the usual pangs of homesickness and loneliness. The inn behind me was humming with business as travelers began to soak up some news from each other and warriors began the work of drowning their memories.
I had my own dreadful memories, but I chose to keep them. I had found the oblivion of the bottle far too compelling and had ended up more than once in a gutter, puddles of sick around me without even knowing if they were my own. Tonight, though, even knowing what would await me should I choose to hoist a wineglass, I found myself tempted just to have a few hours when I wasn't subsumed with the desire for some affection and company.
No, I told myself, no, I would instead go for a walk to the meadow behind the inn, gaze at the stars until the moon set and the feelings became a sad sort of tranquillity. The flowers would smell sweet, and would be a restful pillow if I chose to spread my cloak and lie down there.
I had wandered a little way into the meadow before I realized there was someone else there. A large male figure sat on the ground, his shoulders rolled inwards in a posture of great weariness or sorrow. I turned to leave, when he spoke, "Audette? Is that you?"
"I... yes, I am Audette, do I know you?"
"Yes, though perhaps I have changed more than I have realized. It is Iakob, from next door."
"Skinny Yasha?" I cried, surprised and glad to see someone from my home village.
"Ha, I haven't been called skinny in quite a while," he said as he stood, and as he rose from the ground I could see why. He stood well over six feet tall, a foot and more taller than myself, and his chest and shoulders were as broad as my arms were long. Even in the twilight, I could see how well-muscled his arms were, the light from the inn glancing on the firm bulges of his biceps. I became suddenly self-conscious of my plump body, shaped by hours of sitting, studying, and memorizing magical texts for spells to protect warriors like him. I tried sucking in my round belly, even though I knew it was pointless.
"It is such a pleasure to see you, Yasha. I never thought I'd see anyone from..." I trailed off. Our village was destroyed and I hadn't spoken its name in years.
He cut me off, perhaps knowing a similar reluctance to talk about the past too much. "Me neither. Are you staying at the inn?"
"Yes, I am."
"Will you sit with me a moment? Unless your family is waiting for you inside?"
I shook my head, "No family for me. I've been in Lady Treyer's forces for the past five years. I had been studying at Kilnmark for five before that."
Yasha smiled, and I could see his eyes wrinkle at the corners in the low light. He turned his head towards the inn, and his aquiline profile was illuminated by the lanterns hanging on the outer wall. "You were always the brightest one in the village." He gestured to the ground next to him. "Come sit, if you would."
"Certainly." He had spread out a thick blanket on the ground and had another resting on top of it. "Were you planning on sleeping out here?"
"Maybe. I find most beds too short for my height. I hadn't decided if it would be damp enough tonight to warrant going inside. I also didn't feel like being surrounded by drunken louts." His tone became a bit peevish, and I laughed lightly. "I've become sour in my old age."
"I was actually feeling similarly. That's why I came out to walk here, and look at the stars."
"They are a soothing sight," he said agreeably, and we lapsed into a few moments of companionable silence. After a minute or two, I became aware of his gaze resting on me. I turned my head away nervously, certain that my hair must be frizzy or my face too red even in the darkness.
"Audette, I am so glad to see you. You look just as beautiful as I remembered," he said, his voice low.
"Me?!" I practically squeaked in surprise. "But I was always..." I wanted to say some variation of "so fat" but couldn't think of a way of expressing it that wouldn't further embarrass me. He said nothing, but took my small, soft hand in his great paw, and lifted it to his mouth to kiss the back of it.